WCW Monday Nitro - Monday, 12/29/97WCW Monday Nitro - Monday, 12/29/97
- You ever sit in the boss's chair while he's away? Put your feet up on the desk, just to see what it's like? That's about how I feel getting to do Bill's Nitro report for him this week...
- They open with still pictures of Sting (half his face paint gone) as the New WCW World Champion! Yes!
- We're in Baltimore, Maryland, in a very small arena, as tons of WCW-colored (purple and gold) balloons fall in celebration! Did I mention that Sting is World Champion?
- Nitro Girls - I like the techno music they're playing, and the redhead does some one-handed push-ups, a handstand on the turnbuckle, and waves to the crowd. Not bad.
- Sorry, I don't know them all by name yet. I keep getting them and the Spice Girls mixed up.
- Tony and Mike start, as they give Larry Z his own entrance, complete with Nitro music, cheers from the crowd, and kisses from the Nitro girls. Mike, while bowing down: "We are not worthy!" Heh.
- Tony: "Let me suggest, to all you 18-25 year-old, who live at home with your parents, have no jobs, and are nWo fans, let me suggest the Cartoon Network!" Then: "nWo is now for... losers!" Larry adds that nWo is for "gotten!"
- Goldberg squashes Glacier in a surprisingly short match with the Jackhammer!
- Fortunately, the announcers have plenty to talk about during Glacier's long entrance. As he spends a long time posing, several laser pointers take aim but no one takes him out.
- Goldberg! This man rocks! If he can keep from injuring himself, he'll go far!
- Lodi has a sign "Beware the Raven!" If he ever shows up, I might.
- Glacier attacks before the bell, but Goldberg fights back, and picks up Glacier, holding him there for a good fifteen seconds as though the Iceman just jumped into his arms. Then he just drove him into the mat! Wow!
- Goldberg provides a stomachache for Glacier with a nasty looking football tackle! The Jackhammer is next - it is a shame to see Glacier so quickly trashed, but I'm sure some of you are standing and cheering. (Sit down please, Bill.)
- Promo for WCW Saturday Night, which I'll be back to covering next week.
- Mean Gene wants to interview "the newest member of WCW," Bret "the Hitman" Hart!
- His new music is decent, but I feel it's too mellow. Kinda like to the WWF theme, but Musak-ed out.
- Bret, talking slowly with a lot of thought, looks like he's trying to remember his lines.
- Heh. Bret: "As far as the nWo goes.." (fan yells "nWo sucks!") "Yeah, they do suck!"
- Bret: "The nWo reminds me of the scum I just left behind!" Ouch!
- "I look forward to great matches," including Giant, Lex Luger, Chris Benoit (yes!), and WCW Champion Sting! "Those are the kinda guys I want to wrestle, test my skills against."
- He names off all the members of the nWo as scum that will be dealt with, then he says the biggest one on his list is Hogan! "I've been looking for you for a long time! ...you ran away from me a long time ago, but this time Hulk Hogan - you can't run, and you can't hide!" Yes! I know WCW will tease forever and a day, but Hogan/Hart will sell out whatever arena they put it in.
- While the announcers discuss what just happened, Raven pipes up on a house mike to put down Benoit. "If he wants to have pain inflicted every week, we will be more than happy to inflict it!"
- Benoit beats up Hammer until the Raven's Nest rushes the ring for a DQ.
- Benoit passes on the match to jump into the Raven's Nest, who surprisingly beat the hell out of him and throw him back into the aisle, where Hammer brings him in the ring. Gee, what does you expect, with Riggs, Raven, Lodi, Kidman, and Saturn?
- Nearly blown spot as Hammer superplexes Benoit but not before he almost drops him!
- Ha! SIGN: Raven Fears Soap!
- Hammer runs into the corner, but Benoit isn't there, and as the Nester staggers out, the Crippler catches the arm and slaps on the Crossface!
- The Nest rushes the ring, and with 5 on 1, they trash Benoit.
- Mongo is out! Benoit and McMichael clear the ring, leaving Saturn and Mongo fighting in the ring! And McMichael tosses him out Saturn!
- A plug for America Online, the best part being the kid who says "It's so easy, my dad can use it!"
- Mean Gene now brings out... the "Nature Boy" Ric Flair!
- When Flair shows up, can you do anything BUT raise the four fingers? And Whoo! along with him?
- He congratulates DDP for winning the U.S. title from Curt Hennig, "now you can style and profile!"
- Sting is congratulated also, "he did what he said he was going to do! He beat Hogan!" Excuse me? When did Sting SAY anything?!
- He even congratulates Bret Hart for doing the right thing, but says that he forgot to name the Nature Boy in his list of potential challengers.
- Flair pulls out a newspaper clipping from the Baltimore Sun, with glasses to read it. ("You need these at my age.")
- The article says that no one goes out and puts on the best show every night, except Flair. He throws the clipping in the air and walks off, throwing down the gauntlet to Hart.
- Ultimo Dragon gets the Dragon Sleeper on Eddie Guerrero and WINS THE CRUISERWEIGHT TITLE!
- Ultimo Dragon comes out, you know I really th... LOOK OUT! Eddie Guerrero rushes out to blindside the Dragon with the Cruiserweight belt!
- Quick power bomb on the Dragon, followed by a sharp vertical suplex. But a superplex attempt sees Dragon fight his way out and go for the spinning hurricarana from the top, but Eddie tosses him off and hits a rolling DDT!
- Dragon slips out of Guerrero's grasp and slaps on the Dragon Sleeper from nowhere! Eddie gives up, we have a new champion!
- Eddie beats on him afterward, but it's too late.
- We come back to "Voodoo Child" (Tony: "Loser music!") and Hogan comes out with Bischoff.
- ...with no belt. Hahahahaha!
- Hogan screams to the camera that "he beat the man!" But as Tony says, Hogan doesn't have the title, so he's not the man!
- Eric says "the Heavyweight Champion of the World has something to say, so Shut Up!" Right, that's just a way to get the crowd to make noise!
- Hogan apparently has the latest issue of nWo propaganda, and is willing to share. Isn't he nice?
- It takes about 5 seconds for the "We Want Sting!" chant to begin.
- Hogan reminds us that J.J. Dillon (shown in replay) announced Nick Patrick as the referee, and that Nick called for the bell after Hogan pinned Sting for a (allegedly fast) three-count.
- They show Hart slugging Patrick, which causes the crowd to cheer.
- Hogan says WCW better have some suggestions to fix the situation, since JJ screwed it up.
- Um, I didn't see Starrcade for myself, but everyone is saying Nick Patrick's count wasn't all that fast... Did Nick forget and count it normally or something?
- SIGN: Nitro Girls 4 Life!
- Tony and Tenay are ready for a two-man broadcast until Heenan joins them, pleading his case, wanting his job back. Tony: "What, tonight?" Heenan: "Okay." and sits down. Ha!
- More plugs for the Nitro videotape contest. Sigh.
- Diamond Dallas Page retains his U.S. Title over Mortis.
- Mortis has cool music, a cool costume, and some cool moves. If they could get him out of the "Blood Runs Cold" motif, he could be a big name.
- BANG! Yes! The United States Champion is here! Diamond Dallas Page comes out, complete with jeans, boots, and taped ribs - his normal attire. Oh, and that cool championship belt!
- Vandenberg is up on the apron, having a discussion with the referee about a good place to catch a movie after the show.
- Page has Mortis in the corner, pounding on him, when he catches a low blow. He gets Page up on his shoulders and drops him in some kind of face-first power bomb!
- James Vandenberg chokes DDP with a short piece of rope. Ouch!
- Mortis mocks DDP, but riles up the champion who attackes with a fury! But his offense is broken with a bulldog-like move.
- Hey, I keep up with the technical names of wrestling moves, and I still don't know how to call half of Mortis's moves!
- Page slips behind for a roll-up, but only gets too, and Mortis fights back with a back spinning kick! Smooth!
- Here comes the Flatliner, but Page slips out, reverses around and nails the Diamond Cutter! BANG!
- DDP goes out into the crowd, holding the belt overhead. He better hope no one steals it again tonight...
- Before we go to commercial, second-hour fireworks go off. Heenan: "We are live, from downtown Beirut!"
- Huge reaction for J.J. Dillon! Just kidding, no one notices...
- Dillon thanks Larry Z for keeping it WCW Nitro!
- J.J. says they will let the decision stand, Sting is still the WCW World Champion!
- He just came from Sting's dressing room (a.k.a. an Auto Body & Paint) and Sting SAID he will put the title on the line here in Baltimore tonight! He must be lying, every idiot mark knows Sting doesn't actually speak!
- Booker T. shocks everyone by beating Disco Inferno with a Harlem Hangover and WINS THE TV TITLE!
- Disco Fever! Yeah, yeah, yeah! Funky graphic in which we see DI though a spinning disco ball.
- Booker T arrives as Tony explains the "raise the roof" gesture used by Harlem Heat. Sort of.
- We come back from a quick commercial break to a popularity contest. I guess people like Booker's "raise the roof" gesture better than Disco's dancing...
- The announcers are discussing how fast Patrick counted, and suggest you judge for yourself by getting the replay. Cheap, guys.
- Booker misses Disco with an elbow, but DI is nice enough to fall down anyway.
- Disco tries to whip Booker T into the rail, but gets it reversed and a free chiropractic adjustment in the process.
- I'm not sure if the spot was blown, but Disco takes Booker right out of the ring, going with him!
- I understand WWF is announcing Tyson signing with them, which is probably why the announcers suddenly won't shut up about Sting and Hogan's rematch.
- There's a guy in the third row wearing an old Razor Ramon T-shirt. Heh.
- Booker T hits a running forearm shot, and both men go down. A slugfest ensues, and Disco catches a back spinning heel kick by the Harlem Heat member.
- No way! Booker just won the TV Title! Guess I better go back and re-write the match result... Wow!
- In case you don't remember which is which, the Harlem Hangover is the top rope, somersaulting legdrop - awesome looking move, especially from such a big man.
- Oh great - J.J. Dillon is back out with Mean Gene.
- Apparently, the challenge is to ANY member of the nWo. Hmm...
- Eric comes out after Dillon says he hadn't heard anything from nWo.
- Eric: "Two things: One, you're mine!" He couldn't take Larry, so he's setting his sights lower. "Number two, you're on!" Hogan will face Sting!
- JJ "It took 18 months to get it the first time!" And it took about 18 minutes to get it tonight!
- This is too easy. Something bad is about to happen, I suspect.
- Curt Hennig beats Chris Jericho with the Fisherman's suplex.
- We come from commercial break to nWo music, and out comes Curt Hennig, with Rick Rude, who looks awful! Mostly shaven, looking like he's put on a lot of weight. Heck, it almost doesn't look like him.
- Jericho comes out to Pearl Jam's "Evenflow" and gets right in Hennig's face before the first lock-up.
- Curt nearly catches his foot on Jericho during a leapfrog, and gets the bullfighter treatment as Jericho moves out of the way of his dropkick.
- Hennig tells Rude "Someone's going to get hurt... I'm not a happy man." He shows this with slaps and punches on Lionheart in the corner, but Jericho returns the favor, ending with a spin kick to the jaw!
- This match is having problems. Hennig and Jericho aren't working well together. Hennig is mistimed, and Jericho blows his Asai moonsault, falling on his back instead.
- Hennig snaps on the Fishyplex, and leaves after the win. He tells the camera: "You're lucky it wasn't you, Page!"
- Jericho goes nuts! He bashes a chair into the ringpost repeatedly, saying he's sick of it! Rumors of a trip to Titanville are fueled...
- More Nitro girls, ending their routine by laying down, and Heenan offers mouth-to-mouth to revive them.
- Scott Hall shows up for a quick survey.
- Hall comes out with the nWo music, wearing an nWo Nitro shirt, and one of the 'nWo tag team belts.' Tony: "That's the only gold the nWo has!" Heenan: "I wonder how many boxes of cereal he had to eat to get that thing."
- Tony takes a quick survey of the champions, and there are no nWo among them!
- HA! One fan has a sign that says, "Fear This!" It shows a WCW belt held overhead by Cartman from South Park with a tank top that says Beefcake!
- Hall decides to take his survey, and apparently Baltimore is nWo country.
- Coming back from commercial, it's a quick Nitro tape.
- DDP look alike, who's actually pretty good! Taped ribs, and drawn-on tattoos. Even a cigar and blonde curly wig!
- At this Nitro Party, they're serving Macho Nacos, Harlem Heat Salsa, and Alex Wright. He's the Cheeseball! Too funny!
- Lex Luger beats Buff Bagwell with the Torture Rack for some payback!
- Buff talks about all the ways Lex can't beat him, and challenges him to a rematch. Wait, isn't the rematch usually called for by the guy who lost?
- Lex comes out, nothing special. I really dislike it when a long-time wrestler thinks they can get by without doing anything interesting.
- Norton grabs Luger as he slips in the ring chasing Bagwell, but Lex kicks him away, and Buff stomps the distracted Luger.
- Bagwell goes to work on Lex with a forearm and a dropkick in the back, which sends Lex out of the ring and into a Norton beatdown on the outside.
- More beating on Luger, more cheap shots by Norton outside the ring.
- Buff goes to the top for the Blockbuster, but Luger steps aside and goes right after Bagwell! Several clotheslines, a powerslam, and a shove on Scott Norton, setting up the Torture Rack!
- Message to 'Macho Man' Randy Savage: "You see that, Macho? You're next, come and get it!"
- I guess Luger gets this win so he doesn't feel like a nobody after losing four matches to Bagwell.
- Very short promo for Souled Out, sponsored by Snickers.
- Sting and Hogan meet in a rematch, which ends with - a screwjob!
- Michael Buffer is "conveniently" on hand to announce this rematch...
- Hogan comes out doing his old schtick, posing, flexing, and shirt-ripping. Actually, he rips a tank-top. I guess its getting harder to do in his old age.
- Odd, Hogan comes out alone.
- Sting comes out to the awesome, haunting music played when he was in the rafters with the vulture. My hero is back!
- Sting's wearing a one-piece that is tights and a sleeveless shirt with a huge grey scorpion outlined on the front. Very cool.
- But Buffer doesn't even get to finish his rundown on Sting, when Hogan attacks Sting. He beats on him with the belt, the drops an elbow, and keeps choking my man Sting.
- Sting rolls out of the ring, gets slammed, and stepped on, then thrown back in the ring.
- Hogan looks obsessed as he hammers the back of Sting, until Sting pulls a "Hogan" and just stands straight up, as if unaffected!
- Sting is a house of fire with punches and kicks on Hogan, and even an eye rake!
- Hollywood slips out of the ring, Sting goes after him, slamming him into two totally different guardrails.
- The old man is tossed back in, and Sting stays on him with punches and kicks, then an inverted atomic drop.
- Poking him in the eye, Hogan gets a breath, which he uses to spit on Sting, then chopping him in the corner, whipping him to the opposite side and clotheslining him.
- A cover only gets two, so Hogan lands a series of right hand punches and a pair of big punches.
- It's the big boot of Hogan, but the pin only gets two, and he makes a complaint to the referee, Randy Anderson.
- The two men collide, Hogan falls right off, then Sting falls right into a headbutt on Hogan's crotch!
- Hogan rakes the eyes again, bodyslams Stinger, but misses the Leg Drop Of Doom (LDOD)!
- Sting stomps Hogan, flexes and roars like Luger, and delivers a Stinger Splash! Another Splash, but this time the referee gets caught in it as well!
- And now it's the WCW "You don't get to see what happens!" screw-job ending! I said something bad was going to happen, but this had to be the worst!
- That was pathetic. I was already to rave about what a great show this was, but the cheap cutaway ending just ruined it for me. The WCW wrestlers ruled the roost over the nWo tonight, with some shocking upsets, but it's cheapened by the terrible ending to the show.
- By my clock, the show ended at 7:07. I've seen a "Two Hour" Nitro run as late as 7:20 or 7:30, so don't try to tell me they were legitimately out of time. I have nothing to say about the ending of the show, except: Pathetic.
- I'm glad to cover Nitro, but it's back to Saturday Night for me - see you there!
From Bill: Unfortunately/fortunately, Creed's report was so good, there isn't a lot left for me to add, but...
- For anybody who was at Starrcade and Nitro in Baltimore, it is interesting to note that all four singles belts changed hands in a span of 27 hours. You witnessed history.
- There were no dark matches.
- A lot of signs got confiscated by the Keystone Cops tonight.
- Big pop when Goldberg pinned Glacier. I called this match a couple of months ago.
- Benoit and McMichael gave the four fingers on each hand after the Benoit match.
- Comment about Mortis unrelated to being in the arena: Watch this guy. I think he is the most innovative of any American wrestler in WCW. Good as Malenko and Benoit are, they don't add new moves to their repertoire every match. Mortis does.
- Big pop for Booker T. winning the TV Title. imho, a just reward for one of the best, and previously most underrated, workers in WCW.
- When Disco fell out of the ring with Booker, it looked painful...he fell right on his ass and probably bruised his tailbone.
- Creed was correct...the results of Hall's survey definitely showed Baltimore to be nWo country.
- I still think Sting looks like the Undertaker from the back.
- It looked like Randy "Pee Wee" Anderson took a wicked bad bump when he got caught in the Stinger Splash.
- After the live broadcast ended, Nick Patrick came out and wound up counting a pinfall in Hogan's favor. (Weirdly enough, this got a huge pop.) Hogan regains the belt? Guess again. Nick Patrick, of course, then got decked by Sting, Sting then beat on Hogan, and when Randy Anderson came to, he wound up seeing a tap out by Hogan as Sting had him in the Scorpion Deathlock by that point. J.J. Dillon came running down to ringside, grabbed the belt, and handed it to Sting, implying that Sting retained the belt. Then, all the nWo guys rushed the ring. Then, all the WCW guys rushed the ring...and I mean all of them. It was like last night except it was for a fight, not a party.
- Even though it looked like Sting retained the belt, I am guessing the title will be held up to build heat for the match at Souled Out 2 in the cage.
- Pretzel, small nachos, regular sized beer: $12.50