WCW Monday Nitro - Monday 02/02/98

By Chan and Charlie

Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeere's Charlie, back at 'ya for another Monday Nitro report.
- Forgive me if you're a Jack Nicholson fan and find it offensive for me to use one of his classic lines.
I have to start out with some bad news....the La Parka profile will not be featured this week. Chan has been doing a lot of research and there is so little on the 'Net about him that he cannot successfully do a profile this week. Next week Chan will provide you all with an e-mail from Bill Goldberg's brother as well as a hitlist done by Charlie's friend Stephen. La Parka also WILL be featured in next week's report.
I would like to send out a Happy Birthday to the oft-mentioned Matt who turned 17 on Saturday the 31st.
- For all the ladies reading the report who want to see Matt, go to the Starrcade Report.
- We wanted to go to the Boston Brawl for such an occasion, but I can't even make it to Nashville without getting lost, so Boston was out of the question.
- By the way Matt, don't lose your Fiona Apple ticket, it was expensive.
  - Charlie is on the left and Matt is on the right
I have chosen 2 e-mails of the week this week:
- From Brad in Pittsburgh: "Bill may be the ICON of wrestling reports but you guys are the Show Stoppers!!"
  - Thanks Brad, and by the way, You Rule!!!
- From an anonymous reader in reference to my comment last week about a certain commercial:
  - "I'm a little hurt, all my opinions about which tampons to buy come directly from the commercials on during Nitro. If it wasn't for them I might still be using those bulky pads."
    - Alrighty then.
Question of the week:
- Who is the foxiest lady in wrestling? (Warning! If you select Chyna you will be named in next week's column as a way of embarassment and will be the topic of all jokes in the column.)
Now on to Chan's follow-up of last week's Bill Goldberg profile...
On to the show...
Tonight's wrestling vittles: Gummy Worms in honor of Mankind's interview with Jim Ross. "I ate one worm on a dare, Jimmy, and a rumor was spread that worms were a part of my diet." and Hershey's Nuggets (Shawn Michael's reference of Owen Hart) once again.
The show opens with footage from last week of Savage and Sting
We are live from San Antonio, Texas.
- WCW is in HBK land.
We are treated with the Nitro Girls all decked out in black pants and sequin tops.
- The girls without Spice defeats the purpose of having the Nitro Girls.
- Could the nWo's website "Spice up you life" be a reference to a Spice nWo heel turn?
Tony announces that Sting will face Savage in tonight's main event.
- Gee, I wonder what's supposed to happen on RAW?
- The broadcast crew continues to talk about the problems in the nWo.
- Tenay, Larry, and Tony are all matching tonight in the classy denim Nitro shirts.
Air Juvy over Psychosis
- Ref-Charles Robinson
- Rematch of "The #1 contenders"
- Same wrestlers, same ref, same finish
- Two fans are holding up giant foam hands in the shape of the diamond cutter.
  - Someone has a lot of time on his hands.
- The Flock arrives to chants of, "Raven Sucks!"
- Juvy's tights say "Juvy Juice"
  - "Juice" is an insider term for steroids. If Juvy is on 'roids, he should get a refund.
- Tenay mentioned that they started with a luchadore match because the luchadores are really big in the border states of Texas and California.
- It wasn't a squash as the larger Psychosis got 2 two-counts
- Psychosis is playing the heel as always.
- Whoa! Psychosis comes off the top rope and Juvy catches him with an atomic drop.
- While Juvy is on the floor, Psychosis climbs to the top rope and attempts a missile drop kick, but catches a drop kick from Juvy.
  - Nice spot
- Air Juvy wins with the 450 Splash
- Larry: "What's that written across his Bischoff?"
A promo for Sting/Hogan at Superbrawl VIII presented by WCW/nWo
They had a Shawn Michaels commercial during the break.
- Ironic since WCW was in Shawn's hometown.
Nitro Girls are out to please us again with the same tops as before and skimpy black shorts.
- AAAAAAH, close up of Kim
  - Kim bad, Spice good
"Larry" chants as the announcers talk about Benoit/DDP
- Tenay: "Benoit is the most accomplished wrestler to never receive a shot at a major championship." On October 20 Nitro he wrestled Eddie Guerrero for the Cruiserweight Title and on the October 6 Nitro he wrestled Hennig for the US title.
  - Thank you Chan-Tenay
- Unique because the Champ is challenging the challenger. The main eventer is challenging the undercarder.
- Does anyone know when Benoit lost that tooth?
- I pick the crossface
Mean Gene interviews DDP
- Huge pop for DDP
- I heard this song on the radio today and I had to add the "Self Hi-Five" at the beginning of it.
- DDP says that Benoit is underrated and that he respects Benoit's work ethic.
  - Finally, someone respects Benoit!
- Gene warns DDP about Benoit's crippling reputation.
- DDP continues by saying that Chris earned the name "The Crippler," and that Benoit earned the shot, wants the shot, and the fans want the match. But most of all, DDP wants it because Benoit is the upcoming best in the planet.
- DDP said "it's obviously obvious...."
  - Very articulate
- The interview closes with "I want to know if I can make you feel the bang"
Footage of the jackknife on Giant
- Tony says that the Giant suffered a mild concussion and vertebrae damage.
- Tony: "The most serious injury a person could have..."
  - I don't know about you, but I'd take a neck injury over castration anyday.
    - Please, no feminist responses for that one
- Show footage of Nash/Traylor from last week.
  - On film, Nash just laughs at Scott Dickinson.
    - I would laugh at Dickinson too
- They announce that WCW will start handing out $150,000 fines and jail time for anyone using the jackknife.
  - Larry: "That's almost how much my car cost"
Ultimo Dragon over Kidman
- 33 minutes into the show and we finally get our second match
- Tenay comments on fans at ringside with luchadore masks:
  - "That's the mask of a wrestler named Fishman"
  - Thanks Mike
- Larry: "I'm not even gonna ask"
  - We will. Anyone with info on the Fishman, please email Chan-Tenay
- Lodi's sign: "Kidman, the real luchador"
  - Lodi is getting environmental. He had "Kidman World Tour 1998" written on the back.
- Ref--Randy "PeeWee" Anderson
- WCW is finally making the "less built" wrestlers wear t-shirts
  - Kidman, Spicoli, Sting & Raven due to time out of the ring, and I must mention Dusty.
    - This is why they also make Dusty wear a hat, glasses, suit, everything.
- Dragon puts on the sleeper, but Lodi distracts the ref and Saturn breaks the hold.
- Dragon with a frankensteiner off the top rope to set up the Dragon Sleeper for the win.
- Ultimo Dragon lays out the flock until Saturn gives him a german suplex, but lands on his knees.
  - Where's Martel when you need a save?
- Kidman proceeds to apply the Shooting Star Press and Riggs dumps Lodi over the top rope.
  - Hey now, you don't mess with Lodi while you're on Kidman's world tour.
- Larry: "We gotta stop selling the Flock tickets"
Promo for this year's Bruise Cruise on May 24-28
- Hey Bill, any chance on talking to Arn about getting the DDT Digest staff special rates for this cruise?
- What a way for you to meet all of your staff.
- Let's take a poll open to DDT Digest staff only, if you wanna go gimme a hell yeah, if not then don't reply.
- If Bill pays, I'll definitely go :-)
- Send all "hell yeah's" to Charlie
Interview time with Big Kev
- Oh yeah, he wants to be called "Big Sexy, Giant Killer,...."
- Huge pop for Kev
- Excuse me while I stand up to do the Big Kev fist-in-the-air thing.....
- Kev's gonna make this short and sweet...
- He was sittin' in the back and even after downing a few cold beverages he sees Kidman use the powerbomb.
  - Why wasn't Kidman escorted in handcuffs?
  - Speculation is that the reason the move was banned is that Kev didn't want any undercarders to use "his move".
  - If you know who invented the powerbomb, email us
- Kev continues saying that it's not the move, but the man.
- "WCW thought that the Giant was the trump card, but I stuck him on his skull."
- Proceeds to say that Hogan will be happy to pay his fines.
- Kev does, "what he wants, to whom he wants, and when he wants because he's too big, talented, sexy, and sweeeeeet."
- At the end a la Rick Rude he says, "Hit the music"
  - Shawn has been referring to Rick in the same way in recent weeks.
We begin hour #2 ten minutes early
- Nice planning guys
Sign: "I'm Cajun, not Redneck"
- Very nice
Sign: "Jackknife Dillon"
- I'm game for that
- Wait a minute, I jackknifed my brother Josh the other day.....
Chris Jericho over Super Calo
- Ref--Scott Dickinson
- Jericho: "An apology isn't necessary but a thank you to all the Jerichoholics.."
  - Jericho was booed before he began talking, so he is definitely over as a heel.
- There were 2 Jericho Crybaby signs
- Ha! A fan just had a pizza delivered! That's nuts!
- Calo dropkicks Jericho to the floor and gives him a diving headbutt
  - Nice segment
- Calo misses a frankensteiner, Jericho powerbombs him, and turns it into the liontamer for the win.
- In another Larry financial statement, Larry claimed to have paid $1800 to have his dog, Duke, recover for a knee injury.
  - I wonder if Zbyszko will buy my '85 Corolla for $100,000
- Tenay mentions that Jericho starts to believe his own ga-ga.
  - Larry said, "You've been hanging around Strongbow too much."
    - The irony in that comment is since Zbyszko has been saying that he retired Sammartino and Bockwinkle for so long.
WCW World Television Champion Booker T. over "Every Flight Attendant's Nightmare" Steven Regal
- Mickey J is the ref
- 66 minutes into the show and we have our first heavyweight bout.
- Larry referred to Dusty as Uncle Fester.
  - He has also used the M.O.D. Squad in reference to Scott Hall.
  - He sure likes to refer to shows from the '60's
- Larry says, "I know he's a former TV Champ, I'm the one who took it from him."
  - This is true, for all you Chan's out there, May 2, 1994 in Atlanta, Larry defeated Regal for the belt. Larry's not the only one, Regal is a 4 time champ.
- Larry: "Booker T is a phenomenal athlete, no body fat"
  - Wish we could say the same about Regal.
- Sorry, but I had to cut to RAW once I saw Regal.
  - Nice segment where HBK and Stone Cold Steve Austin have a staredown
- Not much of a match, just a bunch of European Bellycuts, and Regal pushing up his "bogus bicep"
- Booker does his breakdancing and wins with the Harlem Sidekick.
  - Calo was the first to breakdance tonight. Is this a record?
- Sign: "Powerbomb Saddam"
  - Nice
- Larry: "Zbyszko has left the building"
Cut to RAW for a match between Cactus Jack and Chainsaw Charlie
- Chainsaw comes to the ring with a trashcan full of chairs.
- Cactus Jack: "That's not a garbage can, this is a garbage can!"
- Cactus drags a BFI dumpster out full of chairs and smaller trash cans.
- Now that was funny
Footage of Bret Hart's interview from last week.
- "Flair will always be the man"
  - Bret's OK in my book now
Konnan w/Vincent over Hugh Morrus
- Ref--Billy Silverman
- Why don't they call him K-Dawg anymore or even mention his Mexican Heavyweight belt which he has held for an incredibly long time?
- Vincent wore the Texas nWo shirt because they will be in Texas for a few weeks.
  - Vincent would have to brand the bull in his head before he would be over in Texas.
- Anyone know what K-Dawg's tattoos are? Email Chan
- Tony: "One of the things that makes the nWo is so strong is that they're unpredictable."
  - What show has he been watching?
- Very slow and boring match.
- Heenan: "I'm color" referring to his color commentary
  - Ironic with Vincent and K-Dawg in the ring
- They refer to Nash as "The Loose Cannon"
  - They already did this to Savage.
  - What's next? They give Pillman's music to Marty Jannetty?
  - K-Dawg has won two straight. Madden mentioned on the hotline that he signed a new contract so maybe they aren't burying him anymore.
- Morrus goes for the No Laughing Matter, but Konnan counters and gives a pedigree like move for the win.
Hall w/Dusty Rhodes over Jim "The Anvil" Neidhart
- Huge, and I mean HUGE, pop for Hall.
- It's that time in the show and you know what time I'm talking about
- It took a tremendous amount of effort for Dusty to do the Scott Hall point at Hall.
  - That's the most exercise he's gotten in years
  - They made an Outsider's shirt to fit Dusty. Anyone know the size?
  - This man once wrestled topless.
  - There are no words to say how stupid Dusty looked in this spot.
  - Dusty says that he's standing in council on the title situation.
    - If anyone knows the reasoning for this, don't bother to email, but seek psychiatric help.
- nWo wins the survey by a mile
- Talks about being denied of his title shot at Superbrawl VIII
  - "How can a guy in a skirt tell a workin' man what to do?"
  - Questions whether he should go after Hogan or Sting
- He also mentions that everyone else who won the battle royal got their title shot at the past 7 Superbrawls.
  - That's not true considering The Giant got his shot at Souled Out last year.
- Ref--Charles Robinson
- 95 minutes into the show and our first match with two Americans in it.
- Spicoli says that he's there to sub for Hall, but it was a set up to pearl harbor the Anvil when Hall hit him with the mic.
  - Similar to Luger's heel turn in '89 when he hit jobber Lee Scott in the mouth with the mic.
    - If anyone knows what happened to Lee, email Chan
- When Anvil is about to finish off Hall, Dusty begins taunting him.
- As Anvil goes to the corner, Hall sets him up for the edge and the win.
- Spicoli is punking Anvil until British Bulldog makes the save
Mean Gene interviews Lex Luger
- The only black that Luger wore tonight was his belt and boots
- Announces that he'll fight Savage in a no DQ match at Superbrawl
- Says that he once admired Savage, but no longer.
- Refers to Savage as the most dangerous man in wrestling.
  - So he's the most dangerous man in wrestling and he's the loose cannon. Will he soon be the Showstopper and lay down for nobody except for Liz in the future?
  - For the record, we know they're divorced.
- Warns Savage to be prepared for the rack
Nitro girls in the stand.
- Everyone is "standing"
- We will never look at silver sequins the ame way again. :-)
Bill Goldberg over Mark Starr
- A Huge pop for Goldberg in which no one sat back down knowing that it wouldn't last over a minute.
- It didn't
- Heenan: "Forget his name, he won't be here that long."
  - That's why they call him the Brain
- Scott Dickinson was the ref
- Tony: "He's the man who comes up with new maneuvers seemingly each and every time.
  - Whatever Tony
- He speared him and hit the Jackhammer
- Heenan: "Boy, would Raven love to be worked over by this guy"
- The real scary thing about this is that Goldberg has a college degree and we don't
- Goldberg Signs...
  - Goldberg 3:16
  - Goldberg fears no one
  - Goldberg for President
  - One that had a definition of a "goldberg"
Footage of Davey Boy Smith's arrival
- Smith: "You could be that bone"
- Mongo: "Mongo will teach the Bulldog some new tricks"
  - Steve must really be missing Debra
Mongo vs Bulldog to a double countout
- Mongo receives a huge pop
- Mongo: "Hello, Texas, Mongo's home"
  - He really did go to University of Texas. 90 miles from San Antonio - Thanks, Chan
- Mickey Jay was the ref
- There was nothing but an all-out brawl leading to a double count-out
Hogan interview
- I wish they would drown out his interviews with VooDoo Child
- Sign: Hogan fears Duncan
  - Ironic because Flair sat on the bench with Duncan at a Wake Forest game last year
- Compared Nick Patrick to Hogan and then to Clinton.
  - They are just killing what is left of Patrick's image.
- Continues from the last month about the injustice of the Sting match
- yada yada yada
- Says that Savage is on his own
Raven over Disco Inferno
- yeah yeah yeah
- Ref--Billy Silverman
- They mentioned selling out the Fleet Center in one day, but they didn't mention the Internet coverage.
  - Wonder why?
- Disco's new pants rule
- When Raven came out, Bobby said, "Right off the cover of GQ"
- Sign: "Replace JJ with Lodi"
  - We second that. Well, at least the JJ part
- Classic confrontation: grease vs. gel
- They continually mentioned that Raven right leg is an inch and a half shorter than his left, but they never have gone anywhere with this angle.
- I can't even do the play-by-play for this match as I was too busy marking out in my own house.
- An outstanding match in which both contenders each had their moments.
- Disco was not slaughtered because Bobby said, "this is the best I've seen Disco" on more than one occasion.
- Disco got six 2-counts
- Raven won with the DDT of course.
  - He now refers to it as the "Evenflow DDT"
  - As you know by now, Evenflow is a Pearl Jam song that Jericho uses a knock-off of for his ring music.
  - If anyone knows what shirts Kidman or Raven were wearing in their matches, e-mail Chan.
Nitro Girls
- It's just not the same without Spice
- Tony tries to promote the new WCW game by saying "You can use Tony or Bobby" which promotes Bobby to say, "I must've kicked your..."
  - If this is how they sell it, I wonder how they don't sell it?
The Steiners over Buff and Big Kev in a non-title match.
- Ref--Charles Robinson
- DiBiase barked on the way to the ring
  - He has reached a new low
- Buff said that the bottom line is that no one is as buff as meeeeeeeeeeee!
- Buff was taking total control over Scott.
- Rick is posing.
  - I don't know whether to label that as funny or pathetic
- There was a huge pop when Big Kev was tagged in
- Tony commenting on a move applied to Scott:
  - "Necks are not meant to bent that way"
  - Ummm, Tony, Scott doesn't have a neck
- Kev sets Scott up for the jackknife and Rick gives him a clothesline.
- Scott doesn't tag in Rick and gives Buff the Frankensteiner for the win
  - Very impressive for a guy his size
- Rick is pissed and has a standoff with Scott.
  - Kev is in the background saying "hit him, hit him"
  - Rick says that he gets no respect and Scott just replies with "I got the win"
  - Can anyone see a heel turn coming for Rick? Internet scuttlebutt has it that Rick may be the one to turn since Scott Norton used a dog collar at Starrcade and WCW never went anywhere with that angle. Tenay and Bobby commented that you can't argue with success.
Buffer is in town to announce the Savage vs Sting match
Buffer says that it is "a match that will determine once and for all who the better man is." I was unaware there was a debate.
- Ooooooh Liz
- Matt: "When you run out of neon war paint and bleach, and your company is too cheap to buy the rights to the crow, so they give you a vulture instead..."
- Heenan comments on the dramatic change in Sting's appearance.....
- Ref-Randy Anderson always gets the main event.
- Sting has a new uniform. He looks like he's doing a ballet.
- Stinger splash applied to Macho on the rail
- Savage gives Sting a piledriver, but Sting gets up.
- Sting gives him the stinger splash, misses the second one hitting his head on the turnbuckle for which Savage removed the padding.
- Savage gives Sting the elbow from the top rope
  - Coach?
- Hogan runs in to stop the count and gives Savage the DQ.
- Hogan slaps Savage and Luger runs in to give Savage the beating of his life.
- Sting clears the nWo out of the ring leaving him and Hogan until Hogan bails.
- Show fades to black with Sting and Luger side-by-side.
It was a good show. But not great because no Flair.

Christian McArthur sends the following arena report:

Before the show the wrestler's entrance music was played. There wasn't much of a response until the NWO A Team music came on, and the crowd showed their first signs that San Antonio is NWO country. ::sigh::
Penzer gave his speech about no coming over the guard rails, no throwing things, and no lazer pointers.
Dark Match: Riggs defeated Jose Someone, Jr (a native San Antonian). Was actually fairly boring, think Riggs got the pin after shoving Jose's face into the mat.
Teen Wolf came to the ring and did some gymnastics. Oh, my brother just corrected me, that's Wildcat Willie doing that.
The Nitro Girls introduced themselves, including the new one, Whisper. [This is about the time I realized when a pair of binoculars would be handy.]
After Kidman had his match, during the commercials he and Lodi would get up from their seats and taunt the fans, trying to encourage them to cross the railing and go after them. Unfortunately, no one took them up on their offer. ;-)
I'm not sure exactly when the cameras went off and Tony did his, "FANS, WE GOTTA GO!!!!" bit but lets see if I can't help piece what happened. Hogan made the run-in during the Savage vs Sting match [BTW, Sting's entrance was cool in person]. Luger came to the rescue and the NWO arrived at some point. Luger and Sting cleared the ring and were standing in the ring facing the NWO (I assume this is where they left the viewers hanging).

Hogan calls for Savage to come back to the ring, since he had already left and was backstage.
Luger and Sting had a message for the NWO and gave that pointing to the crotch thing.
A challenge to wrestle was made and accepted so we start the post-Nitro match of WCW (Luger and Sting) vs NWO (Hogan, Nash, Savage, Konnan, and Vincent).
Sting started off against Hogan and they did their normal bit, and Sting tagged in Luger.
Luger spent the rest of the match in the ring getting beat on by the NWO. All except Nash tagged in to pound on Luger.
Finally, Luger starts a rebound with Savage in the ring and puts him in the Torture Rack, Sting jumps in the ring to block the NWO from interfering.
Savage gives up and the NWO walk off, without Savage, who's still on Luger's shoulders.
The NWO, sans Savage, walk out the entrance way when finally Luger drops Savage.
Luger and Sting pump the crowd for a reaction, then Sting pulls Macho to his feet. Sting punches Savage in the mouth, down goes Savage.
Luger and Sting head backstage, leaving Savage left for dead (well, we may wish he were left for dead sometimes).

Wasn't all that bad a show, though I'm still kinda mad at DDP for giving Benoit the title shot on Thursday instead of Monday, but oh well, at least I saw Disco wrestle. :-)

Jason Kwak sends the following arena report:

The night started really slow.....it was terrible being in the arena while they featured two matches within the first 40 minutes.
Chan and Charlie were right to mention the huge pops for both Hall and Nash, however, you should have heard the pop for Booker T! It was just as big, if not bigger. Almost everyone in the arena was doing the "raise the roof" pumps.
I don't know if the T.V. caught this but DDP left the ring through the crowd as usual. The cool thing this time was he grabbed those two huge foam hands which formed the Diamond Cutter sign and ran up the steps with them. Pretty damn funny...
You know, I was never really a big Buff Bagwell fan until tonight. He was absolutely hilarious! During the commercial break between the ring entrance of Nash/Bagwell and the Steiners, Nash and Buff worked the crowd with quite a comedy act. First, Nash parked himself on the turnbuckle while Buff posed for him. After every pose, Nash gave him an ovation. It was quite comical. Afterwards, Nash started showing off his agility. He'd hold his hands high then he'd kick his foot all the way up to the hand. Then Buff tried the same thing. After kicking no further then his waist, Buff would fall down in utter agony, pretending to have pulled a muscle. It went over really well with the fans. Finally, Buffs "swinging arm" strut to the ring rivals La Parka's strut as being the funniest strut.
The Sting entrance was WAY cool! He was extremely high! I looked at the ceiling most of the night and tried to figure out how he'd enter. He literally came out of nowhere. It took way to long but it was worth it!
On a side note, when Michael Buffer came out, I yelled,"Mike, your job rules!" He then proceeded to blow me a kiss. What the hell......
After Nitro went off the air, Hogan was in the ring with Sting and Luger. Both Sting and Luger gave Hogan the Crotch Chop. Hogan got on the floor and gathered his troops. He then got on the mike and challenged Sting and Luger to a match against Hogan, Nash, Buff, Vincent, Konnan, and Savage. Hence...
Sting and Luger def. nWo when Luger racked Savage
- Most of the match featured nWo squashing Luger.
  - It was really cool seing 5 former World Champions in one match.
- During one point of the match, after they had Luger under control, Hogan tagged in Vincent and Vincent started whipping up on Lex. That kinda pissed me off.
- Nash never tagged in on this match.
- All the wrestlers seemed like they were having a good time. I noticed everyone of them laughing at least once during the match.
- After Savage tagged in, Luger made it over to Sting for the tag. Sting then opened a can, rest of nWo started running in, which marked the standard chaos in the ring.
- Lex then gives Savage that lousy powerslam of his. Sting signals Lex to rack him. As soon as Lex gets Savage in the rack, the rest of the nWo leave the ring, leaving Savage by himself, exactly like the ending of Boston Brawl.
- Sting and Luger both expressed this rather pathetic look of confusion.
- After Luger dropped Savage, Sting helped Savage up, gave a slight hint of forming an alliance, then pop him a hard right.
It was a good show except for the first hour. I had a sign which read "Viva la Parka" but since he didn't wrestle, the sign did not make it on T.V.

WCW Monday Nitro - Monday 02/02/98

By Chan and Charlie

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