WCW Thunder - Thursday, June 3, 1999

• Ty Shaw comments on David Flair's (lack of) ability:

  It appears to me that David Flair learned to wrestle by spending a lot of time in front of his Sony Playstation playing a lot of Resident Evil. He looks like a friggin' zombie in the ring.

  Since when does a drop toe-hold make you fall face-first with your legs locked in rigor mortis?

  Since when do you stumble around and look at your opponent with your arms out to your sides like Sasquatch (or a bodybuilder, who Davey obviously is NOT) when you have him on the ground?

  I guess it's all part of the angle... but if an honest-to-God veteran wrestler like Dandy can't make you look good, then I hope being a half-ass crappy wrestler is going to be David's gimmick. I hope he does go to the Power Plant and gets seven shades of you-know-what kicked out of him.

  It's all a big conspiracy by our Congress to show wrestling fans the downfalls of playing too many video games.

• Jason Kreitzer catches something I missed:

  I was surprised you only pointed out two of the references to The Rock on Thunder. You mentioned The Shiryu Elbow and Vampiro using the Rock Bottom. But you totally skipped over Savage saying "If you smell what the Mach is cooking." Come on. When WCW copies the WWF, you should mention it as often as possible.

• Thomas Willoughby III draws some possible David Flair opponents:

  Just a lil' thought for the future:

  Charles "Lungless" Robinson vs David Flair?

  Naaaaah.

  Put the now half-winded Robinson in there with Konnan.

  David Flair vs Erik Watts.

  Can you feel the pain?

  No! No! It gets better!

  If not the main event (And, let's face it Flair vs Watts is a main event, anywhere!) then give it the Featured Match slot! Either a 20 minute marathon in the third hour, or that crucial 8:55-9:05 timeslot that keeps people from turning to RAW!

  Now *that* is the way to keep your 'Flair pushing his no-talent son" angle alive.

  PS: Konnan feuding with Hennig. This is a good thing for one crucial reason: Hennig's restholds, oversells, and classic heel 'Slip out of the ring and recover' tactics actually allow Konnan to catch his wind again!

  Editor's Note: This e-mail was sent to me three days before the most recent Monday Nitro aired.

• The infamous Bill Fluty makes his words known:

  Aldo, A couple quick comments:

  David Flair -- the only thing that will make this angle come out OK, is if after Flair eventually is unseated as head of WCW, each of the wrestlers forced to job to him (i.e. Barry Horowitz, Buddy Lee Parker, etc.) gets a rematch where they squash him. Now that would be worth watching!

  Savage's entourage -- I kinda' like having them around, but maybe because I miss women's wrestling, and this is as close as WCW has gotten in several years. I can only hope they eventually move the gals into the ring for actual wrestling, not just as a sideshow. I loved seeing Starla Saxton (Mona, Madness...whatever) get up on the top rope for the drop kick on Bagwell. Looked kinda goofy in her beauty queen outfit, but hey, I'll it.

  I was glad to see several cruiser matches featuring someone other than the almighty triumvirate of Rey, Kidman and Juvi. I like Lash LeRoux and Kaz Hyashi, but was sort of sad to see Lenny Lane do the job for Evan Karagias -- whose makeover with the dreadlocks leaves me pretty cold. But it was still good to see some tv time for these guys in competitive matches.

  Nice report. Thanks.

• A.C. Ansani speaks about our favorite restaurant:

  I stopped past the Nitro Grille this past weekend. Unfortunately it was on Sunday, so I guess all of the guests had left. I thought it was boring. The place is actually pretty standard, it almost looks more like a sports book than a restaurant. WCW better keep guys appearing there frequently, at least once a week, if they want to make a go of it. A place like the All-Star cafe (while it sucks also) at least has a variety of stuff to keep everyone interested.

  Even if you're a casual wrestling fan, there's not a lot there to hold your interest. There are some pictures, of course the first ones you see are Nash, Hogan, Piper, etc., the whole geriatric crew. There is also a big projection set that shows ring action on the wall. It wasn't busy, but I was there in mid afternoon. I'll give it another shot at night sometime and see if I think anything different.

• Finally, Jeff Tatarek gives his analysis on some talent:

  Just some random, rambling thoughts from last Thunder.

  Kaz's finishing senton splash looked pretty brutal; didn't look like a clean landing. One additional thought: why was Disco wearing an eyepatch backstage if all he was going to do for the night was get roughed up by Savage? Some subtle angle advancement? Seems odd and not as hamfistedly clumsy as I've come to know WCW lately.

  Van Hammer still gets zero heat from me. Maybe the fans should start chanting "no justice" whenever he wear the "no peace" singlet. And I couldn't help but laugh when Tenay tried to sell this as an "impressive win" for VH. C'mon, a pinfall over Prince Imajobber is impressive?

  Poor Madusa. She said her favorite wrestler "starts with an M, ends with an M and melts in your mouth". Eeyew. Seeing as how "Macho Man Randy Savage" doesn't end with an M anywhere, it's anyone's guess who she really meant, eh?

  I hate Kitty B. Badd. I really do. Perhaps even more than Gonnad or what used to be Rey Misterio, Jr. (for God's sake just give him the mask back!). Hide all the microphones in the arena. Anything! I've never seen Vampiro wrestle until tonight--I'm usually at work before I realize I've forgotten to set a tape for Nitro or Thunder--and he's really damn smooth to watch. But he seemed really, really stiff against The Cat. Sloppy ending with a camera angle that showed Vampiro's shoulder WAY UP THERE at the three count. At least that's how it looked to me.

  As an aside, please help me understand "stiff" correctly: in the context of my little recap, "stiff" meant that Vampiro didn't look particularly comfortable or polished against Ernest Miller. But I've also heard "stiff" to mean a particularly hard-hitting move or match. Like a couple of months back when Scott Steiner got hit from behind by a cup of soda. I recall he got -extremely- upset with the thrower, and the following match (against DDP?) was called "stiff". Plus you were hoping that Vamps would go "all-stiff on Cat". Me confused. Anyway...

  Knobbs was prattling on about how he was hardcore for as long as he'd had those letters on his chest, or something. Well at the time the only word I saw was STY. Appropriate for such a wallowing time-wasting hog, innit?

  I'm also very, very unhappy that the cruiserweight battle royal was not allowed to finish cleanly. What good did it do Morrus to run in and spoil all the fun? (never mind killing the buzz of luchador fans like me) Obviously, it set up Kidman/Rey Minithug for next week, but...

  Any word if the Tank Abbott/Woof-Woof Steiner fisticuffs were at all "shootish"? Rick seemed to get pretty red around the neck, and my urge to call it as "shootish" was caused by the number of people who came out to separate them and the rapidity with which they arrived.

  A good point made that Savage doesn't seem terribly intimidating if his "ho train" has to do all the work for him. Mona's missile dropkick (which has to be the best move I've seen from a female "wrestler" in MONTHS on the Big Two) only serves to emphasize this. And I think Gorgeous George would've been better served to clock Buff with that lunchbox-sized shoe than trying to choke him with it. :)

  To answer your question, the definition of "stiff" can be found on the RSPW FAQ & Resource Guide, which is maintained by Scott Keith of WrestleManiacs fame.

Why doesn't that guy just pull on his earring?

Bill's right. Wearing earrings while performing distracts from the believability of wrestling. Just thought I'd bring it up.

The Fall Brawl: War Games pay-per-view comes around in September. It's June now, so that gives WCW a good three months or so to build this up and have this year's War Games to be the big blow-off match. By saying War Games, I don't mean last year's bastardized version, but the War Games we all know and love, in which two men start, one from each team enters after "x" amount of minutes until all eight men are participating in the battle.

You could come up with some interesting pairings. One I considered for the old guys was Ric Flair, Randy Savage, Diamond Dallas Page and Bam Bam Bigelow. If you ignore the fact that Flair and Savage recently had heat against each other, this could work. (I'm sure WCW will ignore their feud, though.)

The young guys could be comprised of Konnan, Rey Mysterio, Jr., Buff Bagwell and Disco Inferno. Not a lot of star power, I know, but these four have either been beaten up by Savage or made comments about the older guys stealing their thunder. You could probably substitute Chris Benoit and Dean Malenko for Konnan and Rey Mysterio, Jr. if WCW focuses more on the Horsemen being divided. As for Kevin Nash, if he doesn't have a title shot you could throw him in just to get at Savage, despite the fact that he hardly qualifies as young at age 40.

Keep in mind, all of this is just rambling on my part. I realize that some of the pairings don't make sense (i.e. Flair and Savage together, Nash representing the young guys), but I seriously doubt WCW will make sense out of it all either. Anyway, that's my take on it. What do you think?

I'd like to take a little opinion poll of sorts. Who do you think would best represent the teams in WarGames? I'm not really looking for opinions, just wrestlers, as I will tally the results and post them on next week's report. If you're interested, submit your predictions by clicking on the pretty link.

• The crowd chants for some Goldberg person. Hey, morons, Whoopie's on Hollywood Squares.

• Wha? A match? This soon?!
• Mirror, mirror, on the wall, to whom will Scotty lose this fall?
• Riggs gets referee Johnny Boone to hold the mirror as he checks himself out.
• Riggs is going to get his daily amount of squash, courtesy of Bigelow.
• They talk about Nash's affiliation with Louis Septic Services last Monday night.
• Bigelow pummels Riggs out of a lockup.
• Bigelow sends Riggs cross-corner.
• Repeat above line.
• Bigelow picks up Riggs for a slam but he slips out.
• Riggs pushes Bigelow to the turnbuckle.
• Riggs hits a dropkick.
• Riggs gets in ten punches on the turnbuckle.
• Riggs with another dropkick.
• Riggs applies a boot choke in the corner.
• Bigelow comes back with a clothesline.
• Riggs regains control and lands some kicks.
• Bigelow applies a double-leg takedown and drops a headbutt on the left leg.
• Bigelow does a snapmare and a chinlock.
• Riggs elbows out of the chinlock and heads to the ropes.
• Riggs runs into a knee to the midsection.
• Bigelow stomps on the gut and goes outside.
• Bigelow administers some blows to Riggs' chest.
• Bigelow pulls Riggs outside and runs him into the safety rail.
• Riggs fights back and introduces Bigelow to the rail.
• Both men go back in.
• Riggs with a trio of punches and a cross-corner whip.
• Bigelow evades the running splash.
• Bigelow lands a diving headbutt for two.
• As Bigelow argues with Boone, Riggs rolls him up for two.
• Bigelow levels Riggs with a lariat.
• Bigelow sends Riggs to the corner and hits a running lariat.
• Bigelow with another cross-corner whip but runs into a boot.
• Bigelow tries charging again but Riggs raises both boots this time.
• Riggs drops an elbow for two.
• Riggs applies a Rocker Dropper. (Legdrop DDT)
• Riggs goes up top and lands a crossbody for two.
• Riggs goes to the middle turnbuckle and tries an axehandle but Bigelow catches him with a right fist.
• Bigelow finishes off Riggs with the Greetings.
• YOUR WINNER: Bam Bam Bigelow via Greetings From Asbury Park in 6:50.

• Morrus comes out.
• He'll be facing Kidman.
  • An interesting tidbit is that the casual fan would probably think that Morrus attacking Kidman on Nitro would set up this match, when in reality it was taped last Thursday before this week's Nitro aired.
• Morrus attacks Kidman from behind.
• Morrus lands a right.
• And another.
• Morrus whips Kidman to the ropes.
• Kidman ducks a clothesline and hits a headscissors takeover.
• Kidman goes off the ropes and applies a frankensteiner.
• Kidman dropkicks Morrus out of the ring.
• Kidman goes to the top rope and flies onto Morrus with a crossbody.
• Kidman sends Morrus to the stairs.
• Kidman no-sells a Jimmy Hart axehandle.
• Back in, Hart distracts referee Randy "Pee Wee" Anderson.
• Kidman grabs Hart and nails him but gets clotheslined by Morrus.
• Morrus drops an elbow.
• Morrus distracts Pee Wee, allowing Hart to choke Kidman on the bottom rope.
• Morrus covers for two.
• Kidman gets whipped but tries a sunset flip.
• Morrus punches Kidman in the face to break free.
• Morrus lands a couple of headbutts.
• Morrus whips Kidman, gorilla-presses him and drops him to the mat.
• Morrus covers for two.
• Morrus stomps on Kidman in the corner.
• Morrus pulls Kidman by his legs to the center of the ring.
• Morrus splashes Kidman in the corner.
• Morrus whips Kidman to the corner but misses the axehandle.
• Kidman goes up top and lands a missile dropkick.
• Kidman whips Morrus, but he reverses.
• Kidman lands a kick on Morrus.
• Morrus, in retaliation, clotheslines Kidman over the top rope.
• Back in, Morrus goes up top.
• Kidman evades the elbowdrop.
• Kidman grabs Morrus and does the bulldog off the turnbuckle.
• Morrus blocks a whip and hits a clothesline.
• Morrus tries a powerbomb, with the usual results.
• Kidman goes up top.
• Brian Knobbs comes to ringside and knocks Kidman off the turnbuckle.
• Pee Wee sees this and makes the appropriate decision.
• YOUR WINNER: Kidman via DQ in 6:40.
• Post-match, Knobbs and Morrus lay waste to Kidman.
• Kidman gets introduced to the Pit Stop.
• As Jimmy Hart holds Kidman's legs on the mat, Morrus goes up top and hits the No Laughing Matter.
• Hak makes the save and clears the ring of the First Family.
• Kidman offers a handshake as Chastity looks on.
• Hak responds with a kendo stick to the head.
• Hak and Chastity leave a prone Kidman in the ring.

• "Thumper" and Virgil come out.
• It looks like it will be up to "Buff Daddy" to carry this match.
• Adams goes for a handshake. Buff's response? A pose.
• Lockup, Adams breaks clean in the corner.
• Buff gets a face pop by slapping the turnbuckle.
• Lockup, Buff evades a punch and hammers away.
• Buff does three punches in the corner before Adams goes for the atomic drop.
• Buff no-sells and hits an atomic drop of his own.
• Adams picks up Buff, who squirms out.
• Adams pummels Buff and hits a scoop slam.
• Buff gets whipped, slides under Adams and does an armdrag takedown.
• Buff sends Adams outside with a dropkick and we go to...
• Commercials.
• Back in, Adams sends Buff to the opposite corner.
• Adams applies a bearhug.
• Buff tries to elbow out, prompting Adams to apply a side belly-to-belly suplex.
• Adams puts on a neck vice.
• Buff gets to a vertical base and elbows out.
• Adams catches Buff off the ropes with a backbreaker for two.
• Adams tosses Buff outside for Vincent to beat on.
• Back in, Adams lands a right.
• Adams applies a sloppy backbreaker.
• Adams goes up top but misses the kneedrop.
• Buff is whipped, ducks a lariat and hits a swinging neckbreaker.
• Buff does a crossbody for two.
• Buff lands a running clothesline.
• Buff struts and charges at Adams in the corner.
• Mickey Jay gets between the wrestlers and eats a lariat.
• Adams holds Buff as Vincent gets a chair.
• And, as you could have guessed, Adams eats the chairshot.
• Buff decks Vincent and makes a cover.
• Mickey Jay counts to three and "Buff Daddy" plays over the P.A.
• BUT...
• Mickey Jay says it was two, so we restart the match.
• Adams no-sells a vertical suplex and lands a big boot.
• Adams sends Buff out of the ring.
• Vincent tries some punishment but Buff sends him to the rail.
• As Adams argues with Mickey Jay, Buff goes up top.
• Buff hits the Blockbuster for the win.
• YOUR WINNER: Buff Bagwell via Blockbuster in ~7:40.

• Norton comes out, pissed off as usual.
• Silver King comes out to die tonight.
• King immediately goes for a missile dropkick but Norton no-sells.
• Norton lands a clothesline.
• Norton hits a chop.
• Norton headbutts King.
• Norton with a short-arm clothesline.
• Norton whips King into a back elbow.
• Norton with another headbutt.
• Norton hits some chops in the corner.
• Norton with a double-cross chop.
• Norton lands another headbutt.
• A back elbow sends King down.
• Norton screams into the camera. He can't wrestle all that well, but plays a convincing bad-ass big man.
• Norton whips King into a shoulderblock.
• Norton goes to the ropes and hits King as he is getting up with a shoulderblock, sending him to the mat.
• Norton whip a cross-corner whip followed by a charge.
• Norton tries this again but King gets out of the way.
• King goes up top and tries a moonsault, but he literally bounces off Norton.
• Norton hits a clothesline.
• As Norton goes to finish the match, Silver King pulls out a Mahistral Cradle for the win!
• Just kidding. Powerbomb. Splat. Pin.
• YOUR WINNER: Scott Norton via powerbomb in 3:43.
• Fun little squash, that was.

• Our heavyweight vs. cruiserweight motif continues in this epic struggle over music supremacy in WCW. Yay.
• Mysterio could have probably passed for a stunt double in the Samuel L. Jackson movie One Eight Seven.
• Hennig nails Mysterio coming in.
• Hennig slaps Mysterio in the corner.
• Hennig sends Mysterio to the corner head-first.
• This is like watching a drunk father beat up his son. "A D- in Phys. Ed.?" *WHAP!*
• Hennig picks up Mysterio.
• Mysterio squirms his way to the apron and sends Hennig down with a hair pull.
• Mysterio does a springboard legdrop.
• Hennig ends up outside.
• Mysterio goes for a plancha but fakes Hennig out.
• Mysterio tries to pull Hennig in but eats a jawbreaker.
• In the ring, Hennig drops a couple elbows.
• Mysterio flies toward the turnbuckle after an atomic drop.
• "You failed chemistry?" *WHAP!*
• Hennig lands a right fist.
• Hennig hurls Mysterio to the turnbuckle chest-first.
• Hennig drops a boot on Mysterio's face.
• Hennig goes to the floor and clubs on Mysterio.
• Mysterio is pulled out of the ring and sent to the rail.
• Hennig rolls in and out of the ring to break the ten-count.
• Hennig picks up Mysterio and drops his throat on the rail.
• Commercials.
• Promo for the "Two months behind? The hell you say!" WCW Magazine.
• I think the Miracle Whip commercial would appeal more to wrestling fans if they placed John Nord in the role of the viking who ran out of the product. Huss! Huss!
• In the ring, Hennig chops Mysterio at the ropes.
• "You failed basic algebra?" *WHAP!*
• Mysterio sent to corner, floats over, leaps on Hennig and applies a headscissors takeover.
• Mysterio targets the knee and hits a dropkick.
• Mysterio baseball slides into the knee.
• Mysterio sets Hennig in the corner and does a running dropkick on the injured knee.
• Mysterio with the ten punches on the turnbuckle.
• Hennig goes for the eyes.
• Mysterio rolls to the apron.
• Hennig goes outside and lands an elbow on Mysterio's chin.
• Hennig punches Mysterio on the right cheek.
• Hennig drops his weight on Mysterio.
• In the corner, Hennig lands a chop.
• Hennig does his rolling snapmare.
• Hennig pulls off the straps to his singlet and pays homage to Rick Rude.
• Hennig hits a running knee.
• Hennig does a standing dropkick.
• Mysterio blocks a punch and hits his own.
• Mysterio with a dropkick to the knee.
• Mysterio brings Hennig to the ropes and hits a springboard split-legged moonsault!
• Mysterio tries a springboard moonsault from the middle rope but Hennig catches him.
• Hennig tries a running powerslam but Mysterio shoves him into the ropes.
• Mysterio comes off the ropes with a dropkick to the knee.
• Mysterio hits a springboard Thesz Press that sends Hennig to the mat.
• Mysterio with a roll-through dropkick, sending Hennig to the corner.
• "You skipped an A.A. meeting to cheat on Mom?" *WHAP!*
• Mysterio sets up for the Bronco Buster but Bobby Duncum comes to ringside and trips Mysterio.
• Duncum pulls Mysterio by the legs to the ringpost.
• Hennig holds Mysterio as Duncum comes in the ring and hits him. Sound the bell.
• YOUR WINNER: Rey Mysterio, Jr. via DQ in ~11:13.
• Post-match, Garth Brooks and Bill Ray Cyrus stomp on Mysterio until Kidman and Konnan make the save.
• The faces run the heels out of the ring.

• Benoit comes out to the coolest theme music in wrestling today.
• As Flair makes his way out, Asya poses. Ugh.
• Some idiot in the crowd shows his mastery of spelling by having a sign that says "Rowddy."
• Supposedly, Arn Anderson and Dean Malenko are in the building.
• As the bell sounds, Flair stalls on the apron.
• They lock up.
• It's a chop-fest to start, with Benoit coming out ahead.
• Benoit lands some fists in the corner.
• Flair bails and backtracks to the dressing room as Benoit follows.
• Flair summons Asya, who walks past Benoit and receives instructions.
• Flair back in.
• Lockup.
• Flair does a side headlock and goes to the ropes.
• Flair hits a shoulderblock and goes to the ropes again.
• Benoit applies a drop toe-hold.
• Benoit puts on the figure-four.
• Flair's shoulders touch the mat for two.
• Flair struggles to reach the ropes and gets another two-count.
• Benoit breaks and kicks a begging Flair.
• Benoit drops on Flair's leg.
• Benoit chops away in the corner.
• Benoit grabs Flair's left leg and applies a dragonscrew leg whip.
• Flair shoves referee Johnny Boone.
• Boone shoves back, knocking Flair down.
• Flair pokes the eyes.
• He does it again.
• Benoit gets sent to the mat with a chop.
• Flair covers for two.
• Flair tries to cover Benoit three times, getting two.
• Flair sets Benoit on the middle rope.
• As Flair distracts Boone, Asya rakes Benoit's eyes.
• Flair stomps on Benoit and blatantly chokes him.
• Flair deals with Boone again, allowing Asya to choke Benoit.
• Flair lands a right.
• And another.
• More punches. And a kick.
• They fight. And fight. And fight and fight and fight.
• Benoit gets ten punches on the turnbuckle.
• Benoit whips Flair to the corner and does a back bodydrop.
• Benoit hits a running clothesline.
• Flair begs off and gets kicked.
• Benoit does a corner whip into a back bodydrop.
• Flair trips Benoit and covers with his legs on the ropes. Two.
• Benoit does a backslide for two.
• Flair and Benoit go outside.
• Benoit lands some chops and brings Flair in.
• Benoit gets whipped but tries a sunset flip.
• Flair misses a punch and gets snap-suplexed for two.
• Flair whips Benoit into a head-on collision.
• Flair makes a desperate cover for two.
• Benoit turns an Irish whip by Flair into a sleeperhold.
• Flair shoves Benoit into the ropes and applies a sleeper.
• Benoit shoves Flair into the turnbuckle.
• Flair Flop!
• Benoit gets some offense in the corner.
• Flair whips Benoit into the turnbuckle chest-first.
• Flair tries a backdrop suplex but Benoit flips out.
• Benoit pushes Flair to the ropes and rolls him up for two.
• Flair goes for the eyes.
• Benoit chops Flair, sending him into the turnbuckle.
• Benoit with a back bodydrop.
• Benoit pummels on Flair's head.
• Is it me or has Benoit been bleeding hardway inside his mouth for the majority of the match?
• Benoit whips Flair but telegraphs a back bodydrop.
• Flair lands a kick and goes for the figure-four.
• Benoit cradles Flair for two.
• Benoit no-sells a chop and lands his own.
• Flair applies an atomic drop on the knee.
• Flair puts on the figure-four.
• Benoit points to the ceiling as his shoulders touch the mat for two.
• Benoit sloooooowly rolls Flair over.
• Both men head to the ropes.
• Flair holds Benoit's leg and eats an enziguri.
• Flair with a rolling cradle for two.
• Some mat wrestling follows, and Flair bridges Benoit for two.
• Benoit gets to a standing position and does a backslide for two.
• Benoit is whipped, ducks an elbow and hits a lariat.
• Benoit clotheslines Flair and goes up top.
• The diving headbutt connects!
• One... Two...
• Diamond Dallas Page is at ringside and he pulls out Johnny Boone.
• Bam Bam Bigelow makes his way ringside.
• Benoit fends off the heels for a few seconds but succumbs as Ric Flair comes to.
• Johnny Boone calls for the bell.
• YOUR WINNER: Chris Benoit via DQ in 16:05.
• Post-match, Page and Bigelow combine for a Greetings and Diamond Cutter on Benoit.