WCW Thunder - Thursday, 12/2/99

By The Cubs Fan

Hey, it's me, filling in for Aldo.

I haven't done a two hour show since WCWSN during Super Bowl Weekend, so we'll see how this works.

For those of you in the Chicago area still confused, here's what I last heard for the House show this Sunday at the United Center:

Hart vs. Goldberg for the title
Sting vs. Lex Luger
Ric Flair vs. Chris Benoit
Rick Steiner vs. Sid
Jim Duggan & Chavo Guerrero Jr. vs. Creative Control
Dustin Rhodes vs. Jeff Jarrett
Disco Inferno vs. Curt Hennig
Prince Iaukea vs. the Barbarian
Evan Karagias vs. the Maestro.
Tickets are still left...
I'm busy myself this weekend, with end of semester work and all, so I don't think I'm going.
Nice sounding uppercard, though.

Since they would have taped the two weeks of Thunder last week, but had no show nor a taping because of Thanksgiving, tonight's going be a live show.

Thunders soon will be all taped on Tuesdays, so live Thunders are a dying breed.

Thunder is on the air...

Topeka, Kansas is the site tonight.
Larry and Mike are the announcers
Right to our first match?

Screamin' Norman Smiley vs The Wall (w/o Berlyn) for the Hardcore Title

Norman comes out with a Judo outfit and the Hardcore Belt
Flashback to Nitro, with Berlyn walking in.
...like he will tonight, we all assume.
Nope, Alex comes to the ring as the Wall's taking off his coat, joining the commentators.
The ring's been loaded with foreign objects.
Smiley with a karate kid pose, and gets clotheslined.
Wall with a couple knees, then a trash lid shot.
Alex, talking in English tonight, is saying the Wall is going apologize to him.
Wall with a running slam onto a cookie sheet, then a running elbowdrop.
Wall with a garbage can shot. Smiley screams.
Wall with punches and a choke in the corner.
Wall's running garbage shot gets kicked back in his face.
Norman with a garbage lid shot, cookie sheet shot, garbage can shot, and a Big Wiggle.
Unfortunately, the Wall was still on his feet during the Wiggle and he Hotshots Norman as he was dancing.
Wall with a corner whip, big boot, choke slam blocked with low kicks.
Wall resets himself, but Berlyn jumps on the apron and clocks the Wall with the belt.
The Wall falls to the mat.

So, Norman hitting the Wall with three foreign objects didn't knock him off his feet.
But one belt shot from the mighty Alex Wright floors him?
Suuuuuuuuuuuure.

Norman, still stuck in the choke portion of the chokeslam, covers for the pin and win.
Your Winner: Norman Smiley
Alex is beside himself, but we cut back to the announcers before anything can happen.

Later tonight

JJ/Mona vs Evan/Madusa

La Parka and Kaz (the WCW.com hyped opponents) bumped off the card, sigh.
Mona's good, but Jeff? Eh eh.

Revolution in action.
Chris Benoit vs Lex Luger
Main Event: Luger vs Sid w/Bret doing commentary

Backstage, the Total Package walks into the tape room/trailer

He orders the tape of what was just said rewound...
And finds out that he's facing Sid tonight, without being so happy.

Backstage, Dr. Death and Ed are having a talking

Silver King, in English, complains that he wants his check back from Dr. Death.

Um, why hasn't he cashed it?

King wants a fight for it.
The Villanos show up for no particular reason.
Ed talks up Dr. Death.
Silver King knocks football.
Dr. Death has to hold back Ed, who challenges the Villanos and Silver King for any kind of match.

Elsewhere, Kaz cuts another interview with Mean Gene, re: the Maestro

Maestro vs Kaz Hayashi

Maestro is without Symphony
...but with a Nitro Clip: the last Flair/Symphony bit from Monday.

She's gone home after what happened on Nitro...
...rumors have her being in salary dispute, as is Torrie Wilson

Chain wrestling too fast to call, Kaz and Maestro are working
Ending with Maestro with a cradle for 2.
Tenay's got a meting with Russo tomorrow, re: Jarrett's actions on Monday.

Tenay wants to get Jarrett suspended.
That'll piss him off, for sure.

More quick action...ending with a Kaz dropkick to the back of the head.
Kaz and Maestro are up in fifth gear right now.
Maestro with a turnbuckle smash and slows it down with forearms and European uppercuts.
Maestro with forearm smashes then a choke, then stomping
Starrcade main event is no-DQ, must be a winner.
Maestro with a snap suplex, float over but 2 count.
Maestro with some weird submission hold in the chinlock family, although slaps are added.
David Flair (w/crowbar) comes to the ring.
Maestro with a German suplex, flip out of it, Kaz and Maestro with more reversals ending with Kaz hitting a dropkick.
Kaz with a forearm that hits the ref, then a sleeper on Maestro.
David tries to hit Maestro, but hits Kaz instead.
The Maestro takes off, with David Flair following.
Tenay sez that David was saying "Where is she [Symphony]?", but I didn't hear it.
The ref finally gets up, and starts a count out, instead of just ending the match.
Count out anyway.
Your Winner: Kaz
Kaz is shocked that he won.
I'm not, seeing as they telegraphed that run in at the beginning of the match.
That's 2 for 2 for screwy endings.

Back out in the parking lot

Disco and Lash quickly drive in a car that doesn't seem to belong to those two.

It's way too nice for someone who's in huge gambling debts, you see.

They both take off, and the Gangsters aren't far behind.
Elsewhere, Chavo looks ready to wrestle, but gets a cell call from a customer.

Backstage, Terry and Lex talk

Lex says he just showed up
Terry takes Lex's bag to put it in the locker room.
But that's really Jimmy Hart's bag, who Lex runs in to next...
And gets back his bag, leaving Hart to get his own.
Lex is already to leave...but his tires are flat.

Chavo Guerrero vs BuzzKill (w/ sign)

Chavo's got a package, a briefcase and his cell on the ring
Just to complete it all, BuzzKill has a NAO rip off theme and says "It's me, it's me, it's the B U double Z"
BK: "Make love, not money."
Chavo opens the briefcase and has tie dye stuff inside and incense.
Inside the package? Some really far out lamp that doesn't really seem to work.
BuzzKill tries to figure out how it works

More like trying to figure out why it's not working, as he messes with a switch

The crowd turns on the segment right...THERE, as Buzzkill kills time.
Chavo puts a Walkman on BuzzKill, who lays on his back to listen to the turns.
Chavo takes advantage and covers, but only gets two.
Chavo offers the contents of the briefcase, but no sale.
Chavo closes it up, but takes out a shirt to sell to the ref
While Chavo and the ref discuss, BuzzKill hits Chavo from behind with the briefcase, and covers.
Your Winner: BuzzKill
Larry "Was that a wrestling match or a sales pitch?"
BuzzKill seems surprised he resorted to violence, but borrows money from the ref to buy Chavo's stuff.
You know, there was a time where I'd look forward to Chavo vs Brad Armstrong
That's 3 for 3.

Mean Gene with Chris Benoit

Gene alludes to past matches between Benoit and Liger.
Benoit mentions the Dungeon, then going to Japan for half his career.
Benoit calls Liger the most technically proficient wrestler he's ever faced.

Elsewhere, Meng checks into his dressing room

But Lash and Disco sneak around the corner after Meng is in the room, take his name off, and put their names on.
I'd like Lash and Disco as a team, if they weren't in this mobsters angle.
And they actually wrestled, too.

Backstage, Evan and Madusa are talking about the title shot

Evan's feeling frustrated, I think.
Madusa promises that she'll give Evan "everything and more" once she gets the title shot.
Well, I think we can all guess what's going happen at Starrcade now.

Recap from the past few Nitros.

Goldberg and Sid teaming up for the first two times.
Opening interview on Nitro.
Interference in both Sid and Goldberg's matches on Nitro.
Replay of the Sting/Luger/Liz mud angle.
Jeff Jarrett guitar-ing Bret from two weeks ago.
Jeff Jarrett guitar-ing more people in the cage match.
End of the Nitro Girls' fight two weeks ago,

In fast forward to make it look like Skye could have possible hurt Spice.

More Nitro Girl stuff

They do still instead of clips for some of it, don't ask me why.
I don't care enough to pay attention.

Highlights from the Lash/Disco/Mobster bits from Monday end the clips.

Backstage, Lex is sweating out his match.

Then he comes to the conclusion that he's the best, so he has nothing to worry about.

Elsewhere, Mean Gene is talking to Sid

Sid's playing with a Luger action figure.
Sid vs Nash in a powerbomb match at Starrcade.
Sid breaks apart the action figure as a preview of the main event.
Back to Luger, who looks quite worried.
Luger calls for a cab.

I'd just starting running if I were him.

And there's Dr. Death and Ed getting ready to come to the ring.

Backstage, the mobsters are assaulting random arena workers to find out where Disco and Lash are...

They tell one to take a message to those two, and lock him in a freezer.

Dr. Death (w/"Oklahoma" Ed, BBQ sauce and a check) vs Silver King and the Villanos in a "Let's squash the luchadores" match

Well, they're calling it a "handicap" match, but let's not kid ourselves...
Then again, we haven't got a clean ending yet, so maybe Vamp and the Misfits can make a save here...
I'm calling him Ed, not the announcers.
The luchas don't get an entrance, of course.
Replay of the Misfits punking out Ed.
Larry walks out! He doesn't want anything to do with Ed!

Yep, Larry's going turn on Russo soon...

Ed takes his place at the booth, with the check.
Meanwhile, Silver King and the luchas finally take the advantage after a King missile dropkick.
Hard to keep track of the action between the cuts to Ed at the booth and Larry walking out.
Dr. Death isn't affected by a triple headbutt, and press slams Silver King

The Villanos just stand around while Dr. Death has King over his head.

Vampiro shows up during all of this, attacking Ed on the outside.
With Ed away from the desk, Silver King takes the check and takes off.
Meanwhile Dr. Death gets a pin after a powerslam, I guess.
Your Winner: Dr. Death
It might have been an Oklahoma Stampede, but the camera wasn't paying attention.
Vampiro is shown walking through the crowd in Ed's cowboy hat.

Backstage...

Lex nearly walks right into the camera man.
Then...Lex is trying to walk out and into the cab, but runs into the Mobsters.
They question him about Disco and Lash, and he directs him to their named dressing room.
Meanwhile, Silver King dives into Lex's cab and the cab takes off.
Lex is upset

Walk.
Take a bus.
Public transportation is good, ya know.
You can't be picky when you're running from Sid.

Jushin Liger is walking!
And so is Benoit.
They hype the new PacMan video game, which gives me a chance to catch up with the 50 different things happening at once.
Back to the mobsters, they're planning on punking out Disco and Lash.

Jushin Liger vs Chris Benoit

Larry's back, and complaining about the guest announcers
Liger gets an entrance and a clip of losing to Juvie
Larry: "I don't need fools coming down here to get in my way"
Juvie's music cues up after Benoit arrives, and he's followed by Psi and Parka!

I wonder if the proposed "Visa" angle is now over, since Russo said that he'd clear up the problems if Juvie won.

Juvie's arm is in a sling.
Liger invites them in the ring, but Juvie decides to commentate.
We watch Juvie put on the headset instead of the opening flurry.
Juvie says Liger has no respect for the youth or the wrestling business.
Liger and Benoit with some fun stuff, but no one else is paying attention to it...
Benoit and Liger struggle doing a backslide reversal, which Liger reverses, with a few near falls.
Juvie promises a big surprise

Tenay "Why are Psychosis and La Parka here?"
Juvie "You know why they are here?"
Tenay "Why?
Juvie "IT DOESN'T MATTER why they're here!"
X-Mas gift for Juventud: One of those Rock T-Shirts.

Liger winning a test of strength, then Benoit reverses his way out of it
Liger with a painful looking rolling heel kick.
Benoit with chops, and a running knee.
Just announced: Chris Benoit vs Kevin Nash on Nitro.
And Benoit vs Hall at Starrcade in a ladder match.
Benoit tries for a suplex, blocked and suplexed out of the ring.
Liger to the top rope, tope on to Benoit

Juvie: "Benoit's a professional. He didn't let Liger go to the floor and break his arm like Liger did me."
Larry: "What?"
Tenay points out that is was Juvie's offensive move that got him hurt.
In real life, Juvie's got a point...the receiver of a tope/plancha is supposed to catch the guy doing it.
But in the kayfabe world, why would Liger catch you?

Liger with a inverted surfboard in the ring
Juvie rips of Jericho's "Never eeeeeeever" as well.

Doctor's says he's out six weeks
But Juvie says he could beat Liger with one arm.
They may have to do that, 'cause Liger is supposed to defending the title on 1/4 in Japan.

Liger with a nice brainbuster, two count.
Benoit comes back, corner whip, Liger gets a foot up, Tornado DDT thrown off, double clothesline takes them both down.
Liger tries an enzuigiri, but Benoit ducks.
Benoit with an elbow drop and a slow recovery to his feet.
Benoit with a great snap suplex, followed by a great backdrop suplex.
2 count, Liger gets foot on the ropes.
Benoit with a side backbreaker, 2 count.
Benoit with chops in the corner.
Benoit with a cross corner whip, clothesline.
Benoit to the top, but Liger cuts him off at the top...HUGE SUPERPLEX!
Psychosis and Parka run in the ring and beat Liger, with Juvie cheering them on.
Your Winner: No one
Eh...Best match tonight so far, but not super.
Seemed like they were clicking and the fans getting into it when it ended.
Benoit helps Liger and the Canada-Japan connection clears the ring.

Mean Gene with Buff Bagwell

Buff's taking on Meng tonight.
Go Meng!
Gene says Meng could turn him into a speed bump.
Buff says he's going to be the roadblock.
Roadblock! He was something.
Anyway, Buff says he's going take out Meng tonight.

Backstage the Mobsters finally check the room

And get beat by Meng.
Tongan Death Grip for one of them, general beating for the other.

After a break, we go backstage some more

Lex is calling WCW
As a doctor with a fake voice about a family emergency and Luger needs to leave right away.
Terry Taylor pops in from the next room and says "nice try" but he's still in the main event.

Buff Bagwell vs Meng

Go Meng Go!
Meng with the afro/big pants combo tonight.
This will be a change from the last match.
Lockup, Buff thrown in the corner.
Buff tries to get the crowd behind him.
Dustin will be in the ring Monday, for his debut match.
Lockup, repeat, but Buff fights back with punches.
Buff with a whip, reversed, hiptoss reversed, Buff with a running clothesline, no effect.
Buff with another, no effect.
Meng tries for his own, Buff ducks under and hits a dropkick, knocking Meng of his feet.
And another dropkick which levels Meng again.
And the ten punches in the corner, except that Meng drops him on the ropes at 8.
Meng with a clothesline, then punches and kicks in the corner.
Larry puts together that the Outsiders might be working with Russo and Co. after getting helped by Jarrett Monday night

I think it's kinda been hinted ever since Russo waived Nash's retirement.
But...I wonder if Hall and Nash are the only ones secretly allied with Russo...

Meng with chops and a choke.
Buff is sucking wind now, and Meng beats on him some more with right hands, before a boot choke.
Buff kicks at Meng's legs, then another choke.
Meng with a side backbreaker, holds him, and another.
Meng with punches, whip, reversal, Buff with lefts and a swinging neckbreaker.
Buff of the ropes, cross body, 2 count.
The Mobsters are walking to the ring.
The ref goes down while we were watching the Mobsters walking.
The mobsters attack Meng...and Bagwell.

Okay, Meng I can kinda understand.
But why attack Bagwell?
Why not make him lose?

Meng cleans out Johnny the Bull.
Vito gets a chop.
Buff rewards Meng's help by setting up for the Blockbuster...
Vito starts to sneak up behind Meng
Buff waves Meng closer, either as a kayfabe break or to set up for a...
Blockbuster over Meng and on Vito.

Hmm, on replay, it looks like Buff was going for Meng, and Meng just happened to duck.

Buff gets back up, and right into a Tongan Death Grip
The fact that there are extra bodies everyone doesn't stop the three count
Your Winner: Meng
Tongan on Vito after the match, and Johnny the Bull attacks as we go to back...

Mean Gene with Mona and Jeff Jarrett

Mona complains about Gene looking at places other than her face.

Mona complains about being ignored after beating Madusa...why is she getting a title shot?
Jeff Jarrett complains about sharing interview time and calls Mona "Miss Slappy."
Jeff orders Mona away.
Jeff says he's got a hit list for Nitro: Goldberg and Dustin.

In the back, the Mobsters recover from the attack

with bottles of SURGE!
Johnny the Bull could really go for a cheese sandwich right now.
That's pretty much it.

Jeff Jarrett/Mona vs Madusa/Evan Karagias

Jeff Jarrett's opening is note for note from Kid Rock's Cowboy.
I wonder how Kid Rock feels 'bout that, seeing as he's on the Mayhem CD

They ask him to use some songs and not others?

Tenay promises more info on his meeting with Russo about Jarrett on WCWSN.
The first team comes out separate, the second together.
Jeff decides to leave Mona vs Evan and hang out on the outside.
After reversals, Evan with a hiptoss, then a takedown, which is reversed by Mona.
The crowd quickly chants something I don't make out...

Think it was "Jarrett Sucks"

Jarrett has words with Tenay about Monday Night, which is apparently more important then the match.
Back in that thing, Madusa has tagged in and just got armdragged and sloooooowly gets back to her feat
Another armdrag by Mona.
Madusa recovers, tag, double whip, double backdrop.
Jeff is till not on the apron.
Somehow, Madusa's still legal, and puts an armbar-esque move on Madusa.
Jeff's sitting on the steps, facing the crowd.

Kinda' like Mankind when he kinda' turned on the Rock.
Except no one cares about Jeff Jarrett
And Mona isn't (yet) the People's Champion
And the Hollys are more fun then Evan and Madusa
Okay, it's nothing like it. Sorry for even bringing it up.

Madusa with a snap suplex.
Madusa goes up top, but gets thrown off the top rope by Mona.
Evan goes to the top, but gets crotched...Mona with a top rope 'rana to a big pop
Madusa stops her from covering and hits a release German suplex.
Evan with corkscrew moonsault splash for the pin.
Your Winner: Madusa and Evan
Jarrett complains about Mona not winning.
Mona dropkicks Jarrett in the back.
Jarrett guitars Mona.

Tenay and Larry are outraged.
The sound guy is moved enough to start Jarrett's music
What was that someone said?
Something about Jeff not hitting women with guitars here?
Eh, must be making something up.
This puts Mona on Ivory's level, right?

Bret Hart montage full of clips

nWo's first celebrating of Bret's signing
Initial anti-nWo fighting.
Feud with Ric Flair
Skipping over him joining the nWo, saving Sting from Hogan and saying he's a good guy
Turning on Sting...
Helping Hogan win the title and join the nWo for the first time...

Which they seem to play off as happening after he turned on Sting.

Owen Match
Coming back and feuding with Lex Luger,

which happened around the Owen match, not after it.
Time is irrelevant to WCW story lines, I guess.

Vs Goldberg in the tournament
Mayhem and vs Sting and Benoit.
Offering Goldberg a Starrcade re-match

Mean Gene with the Revolution

"Earlier Today"
They're starting their own country, you know.
Malenko/Saturn vs Lash/Disco
Saturn cuts another goofy promo.
Saturn: "I know my geography...not only do we have our own country, but we have our own continent - Asya!"

Elsewhere...

Sid warms up.
Lex talks to Russo via Cell Phone, and finds out that he's getting something out of the match.
Winner of Sid/Luger gets a World Title shot on Nitro
Lex is happier about the match now.

Mean Gene with Disco and Lash

Gene recaps the whole angle in under a minute.
Disco says that they can outsmart the Mobsters
Lash says that the respect and the need to survive brought them together.
Disco asks Lash about the split/punch move.
Lash say's it's the Bourbon Street Blues.
Disco tells Lash not to do it tonight, because dancing is his gimmick.

Disco Inferno and Lash LeRoux vs Saturn and Dean Malenko (w/Asya and Ol' One Arm)

Clip of the Mobsters skit from Monday
For a close team, Lash and Disco have separate entrances.
Tenay talks about Lex being offered the title shot
Larry says Russo is just using carrots like that to get everyone to do what he wants.
I guess the Revolution needs more interview time because they take it.

Dean makes fun of Lash's Cajun heritage
And then Shane makes fun of Disco's Brooklyn accent

The Mobsters show and we get more talking, as Saturn taunts them.
The Mobsters run the ring, and fight the Revolution, and that's our match?
Lash and Disco stand outside and watch.
Double low blow from Asya allow the Revolution to take control.
T-Bone suplex by Saturn, and the Mobsters get tossed from the ring
The cops and security take the Mobsters away.
Disco and Lash attack Saturn from behind.
Disco with a Russian legsweep and a second rope forearm drop for a 2 count.
Tenay announces another match for Nitro: Evan vs Madusa vs Mona

Madusa's Cruiserweight shot is on the line
If Evan wins, no one gets a shot

Tag, but Saturn takes control with a clothesline.
Lash reverses a slam into a split legged pumphandle slam.
Lash with punches, spin, split, clothesline

Uh oh, that's the Bourbon Street Blues
Lash is mad, but he kinda' is used to doing it.

Disco's mad at him for dancing and gets tagged in.
Disco with a swinging neckbreaker and gets his dance move in.
While he's dancing, Dean checks in and gets a back heel kick.
Dean with a cross corner whip and a clothesline.
Dean with stomps and a forearm for Lash on the outside.
Dean tags to Saturn, corner whip, whip Saturn in, but Disco moves out of the way and sunset flips Dean for 2 as Saturn breaks it up.
Saturn with a cross whip, reversed, kip up, Last Dance blocked, but Disco's boot is in.
More reversals lead to Disco being badly crotched on the top rope, and Saturn springboard bulldogs him to the outside in a cool more.
Both men slowly roll in.
Tag to Dean, Tag to Lash, Lash ducks a clothesline, hits a dropkick.
Lash with a whip, backdrop.
Lash goes for the Whiplash, but Saturn breaks it up.
All for in, Lash gets whipped into Dean with a clothesline
Saturn takes out Lash with a Super kick.
Double clothesline on Dean and Disco, knocking him down.
Lash on the outside wants to hit Asya, but decides against it, till Asya tries to kick him.
Lash gets nailed from behind by Shane's cast, and gets thrown back in.
Dean hooks on the Cloverleaf, and Saturn holds off Disco for the tap out.
Your Winner: The Revolution
Lugz Replay shows that Saturn's Superkick didn't really hit that hard.

Thanks Lugz!

The Total Package vs Sid

Winner gets a title shot on Nitro
Bret joins the announcers

He spends the early portion of the match talking about facing Luger...

Lex gets the mic after both are in the ring

Bret talks over most of it.
But Lex wants to know if Sid wants to do it the easy way or the hard way.
The Hard Way being Luger beating Sid.
Before Lex can say the easy way, ref Charles Robinson notices a pepper spray bottle on Luger.

Luger turns to the ref and Sid elects "Hardway", knocking down Luger.
Sid with punches, whip, big foot
Sid with stomps in the corner
Lex with a low blow, then follows with an inverted atomic drop and a clothesline
Liz walks to the ring.
Luger with punches, not noticing Liz yet.
Luger with a whip, Sid ducks a clothesline, double clothesline knocking both down.
Luger crawls over to Liz, who tries to spray Luger with the pepper spray.
But Luger gets it and sprays it in Sid's eyes when he tries for a chokeslam
Luger quickly rolls up Sid

Putting Sid's feet well into the ropes...

A second referee runs in and counts the pin.

Man, he should try out for the Olympic track team, getting out there that fast.

Your Winner: The Total Package
So, it's Luger/Bret for the Title.
Sid, with his eyes now clear, sees Luger...powerbomb, end of show.

Hmm...when in Rome...

The Good: Liger vs Benoit probably wasn't super great, but it was fun while it lasted. The Maestro impressed me, keeping up with Kaz early, and that was fun while it lasted. And Meng beat Buff Bagwell, which is always good.
The Bad: Waaaaaay too many skits. Some of the Luger and the Mobster skits could have easily been taken out to leave more time for the actual wrestling. Seeing Vito and the Bull about 10 times a night doesn't make more interested in them...it just makes me more sick of them.
The Ugly: Every single match, except Dr. Death vs the Luchas, ended in a screwjob. And even the Dr. Death match had Vampiro running in, Silver King running out and Ed running his mouth.

See you this weekend for Worldwide...

WCW Thunder - Thursday, 12/2/99

By The Cubs Fan

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