The Top 10 of the Reader Submitted Top 10 Lists
The Top 10 of the Reader Submitted Top 10 Lists
Start at 10 on each list and work your way up.
Sorry, but HTML ordered lists only ascend so I can't do them in reverse.
Until the end of May, 1997, readers were invited to send in their top ten lists. I have taken the best ten of them and put them here for your enjoyment. They are in reverse chronological order of when I first posted them. Click here to see the rest of the reader submitted top ten lists (note that they are 141K worth of stuff you've probably seen already if you are a regular reader). The top ten lists are closed to new submissions. Why, you ask?
Top Ten Things Benoit Should Say He's Going to Do to Sullivan Besides Beat Him Mentally, Physically, and Spiritually
by Ben at UNC-Greensboro
- Sullivan, I'm going to come to your house, and I'm going to wash a load of your and Jacqueline's undergarments, and I'm going to leave them in the washer to sour and mildew.
- Sullivan, I'm going to come to your house, and I'm going to shave my pits with your electric razor.
- Sullivan, I'm going to come to your house, and I'm bringing Glacier with me, and I'm going to make you watch him do his entrance into your house.
- Sullivan, I'm going to come to your house, and I'm going to overflow your toilet.
- Sullivan, I'm going to come to your house, and I'm going to leave some cookies for you with laxatives in them, and I'm going to put a note that says "From Jacqueline with love".
- Sullivan, I'm going to come to your house, and I'm going to use your restroom, and I'm going to wipe with your toothbrush.
- Sullivan, I'm going to come to your house, and I'm going to make you look at naked pictures of Dusty Rhodes, the American Nightmare.
- Sullivan, I'm going to come to your house, and I'm going to make you watch videos of my interviews.
- Sullivan, I'm going to come to your house, and I'm going to leave the caps off your soda bottles, so that when you get thirsty, you'll have to drink flat soda.
- Sullivan, I'm going to come to your house, and I'm going to make you try on one of Jacqueline's dresses.
Top 10 Things That Sting Was Doing While Under The Ring For Two Hours
by Bill from DDT Digest (sorry, had to put in one of my own)
- He had that Playboy with Kimberly in it and, well, he'd forgotten his white face paint...
- Counting the money he was going to make for two minutes of work
- Shooting craps with The Gambler
- Looking for Glacier's talent
- Still there waiting the WCW website to post the their up-to-the-minute Slamboree results
- Fell asleep watching tapes of Lex Luger racking big, fat jobbers
- Looking for a water bottle for Jacqueline to throw
- Staying out of the sun so a tan won't ruin that bleach white complexion
- Hiding from all the full cups of soda that were going to be thrown at Bischoff
- The New York Times Crossword Puzzle (it's easiest on Mondays)
Top 10 WCW Nicknames (If done by ESPN's Chris Berman)
by (another) Bill M.
- Super Calo "Fragilisticexbialadoshus"
- "The Artist Formerly Known As" Prince Iaukea
- Larry Zbyszko "Shredded Wheat"
- Konan "O'Brien"
- Eric Bischoff "The Old Block"
- Jim Duggan "Donuts"
- Gene Okerlund "Raiders"
- Chris "O" Benoit "Kenobie"
- Steve "Buick" Regal
- Stevie Ray "Cyrus"
Top 10 Reasons Dennis Rodman Joined The nWo
by Brad P.
- Tired of hanging with "his Airness" wants to hang out with "his Hairless"
- All part of secret plan to get Miss Jacqueline to kick David Stern's butt
- Wants to be the new "Queen" of WCW
- All the free fashion tips from Sister Sherri he can get
- Just like the rest of us, wants to know what the hell is going on with Sting
- All the "groin kicking" he wants!!!!
- Doing research for a book on Hulk Hogan, it is titled "As Bald as I Wanna Be"
- Thinks nWo stands for "Normally we offend"
- Wants to start pregame peptalk with "Ya know, brother"
- Gets all the old Johnny B. Badd costumes!!!!
Top Ten (Humorous) Predictions For The Near Future
by Al Simonis at Drake University
- After his brilliant work as spokesman for WCW Uncensored, Hugh Morrus will recieving a new gimmick. He will be now be known as the "Pitch Man" Hugh Morrus. He will wrestle in a suit a la IRS, and carry a demographic chart to the ring. His finisher will be changed to the "Ratings Drop", and will consist of Morrus whacking his opponent over the head with the chart.
- Based on the sudden popularity of "Stone Cold" Steve Austin, Vince has just announced that all WWF wrestlers are now required to shave their heads and grow goatees. Masked Mexican wrestlers will wear masks depicting Austin's face.
- After Bret Hart's recent "expanding of the WWF's vocabulary", several wrestlers have requested name changes to keep up with the excellence of expletivation. Look forward to seeing Shawn "Motherf___er" Michaels, "S__tman" Bret Hart, and "Stone Cold" Steve A_stin in the near future.
- The next member of the nWo: Joe. Joe who? Joe Mama! Just kidding.
- Vince is gonna find some way to hire Disco Inferno and change his gimmick to something ridiculing Eric B. Not that that's nescessarily a bad thing: the first batch of "Billionaire Ted" sketches were hilarious. This one I'm almost half serious about.
- The next big WWF feud: Sultan vs Mankind! Not that I'm a big fan of the Sultan, but I'd really like to see ol' Cactus Jack try to get the mandible claw on a guy in a mask.
- Jane Fonda will appear on an upcoming episode of Nitro and give Eric Bischoff a dirty look.
- Following the trend of Kevin Sullivan and Miss J, expect many WCW superstars to come up with really cool original catch phrases. For example: Lex saying "Can't touch this!" before racking some Schmo, and Ice Train exclaming "Stop that train, I wanna get off" before jobbing to someone, especially if he's submitting.
- Lee Marshall will (finally) run out of stupid "weasel" references. God, I really hope this one actually comes through...
- ECW wrestling will have a dramatic effect on the WWF. Vince is even thinking of renaming the Federation to mimic Extreme Championship Wrestling. The current frontrunner is the World Championship Wrestling Federation. Another original idea from the McIdea Factory!
Top Ten Reasons To Watch Robin Hood
by Al Simonis at Drake University
- You never know when the Giant & Hollywood might be dukin' it out in the breaks.
- Lots of realistic accents: none of them English!
- La Femme Nikita is probably just having sex or something.
- All those classic Robin Hood stories you remember from your childhood, like the one where Marion's cousin is turned into a zombie.
- It's a show about a bunch of guys in tights fighting each other following a show about a bunch of guys in tights fighting each other.
- The whimsical scenes of Robin Hood washing his underwear.
- Watching these guys trade lines makes even Benoit look like Clark Gable.
- Fight scenes make you wish that Nitro was a three hour show.
- At least it's not Thunder in Paradise (aka Hogan's nickel tour of Disneyland).
- Robin Hood's facial hair makes Jim Neidhart's goatee look cool.
Top Ten Ways You Can Tell The Sting "Crow" Angle Has Gone On Too Long
by Brad P.
- That isn't face paint!!!!!!!!
- "Diamond" Dallas Page was known as "Coal" Dallas Page when the angle began
- Dean Malenko has gotten more monotone (on the real side, does this guy ever get excited????)
- Sting "droppings" all over fans
- Sting spotted in the background of CNN news with sign "will drop stupid gimmick for food!!".
- Sting's wife complaining of his unnatural desire to hang out in the attic.
- Eric B. has accomplished life long goal to be the "most annoying human to ever walk the earth".
- Syxxs' perm gel used to way just 3 lbs. Now weighs world record 18 lbs.
- Dusty has gotten even less understandable!!!
- WCW coming out with a "Where is Waldo" type book called "Find the white faced freak in the stands".
Jeremy's Top 10 Reasons To Watch Wrestling
by Jeremy Moran at Hardin-Simmons University
- Sunny
- Sunny
- Lady Alexandra
- Lady Alexandra
- Marlena
- Marlena
- Sable
- Sable
- Francine
- Francine
Top 10 Things Miss Jacqueline Was REALLY Looking For Under The Ring On 2/3 Nitro
by Phil S.
- The recently-lost edge WCW had over WWF
- Ric Flair's sanity
- Kevin Sullivan's trunks, now invisible under his gut
- Woman's Thighmaster
- Scott Hall's American accent
- Scott Steiner's 'roids
- Steve McMichael's acting ability
- A shatterable chair (ironically, Benoit and Sullivan have used them all)
- Benoit's missing teeth
- Sting's allegiance
Top Ten Things Sting Is Really Whispering In The Giant's Ear
by Brad
- Whooooooo!!
- I AM the second coming of Doink!!!!!
- I can't believe it's not butter.
- You know what?.... That's what!! (followed by insane laughter)
- Ten bucks if you really hit Hogan with the bat.
- Is Syxx annoying or what?!!
- I love you, you love me, we're a happy family.
- It's not called "Sting's Army", it's "Sting's Doctors of Love".
- Let's go looking for chicks.
- Man, do I need some sun!!!