WCW Thunder - Thursday, April 15, 1999

By Aldo

Drink Surge, the mouth-watering sport beverage.

Welcome to yet another Thunder report. Tonight's show comes from the DDT Digest Florida Chapter Headquarters of Orlando, FL! Isn't that lovely...
Here's a little mailbag for you folks deprived of letters to the editor:
- Andy Kieniksman starts us off with a little ditty on a certain valet:
  I just read your report on the 4/7 Thunder. Amen to your comment on the ugly! I've never seen ECW, but when the rumors started about Chastity showing up in WCW and the ECW marks talked about what a babe she was, I was quite naturally intrigued. Then when we finally get a good look at her, she is FUGLY. I mean, she makes Luna looks like Miss America. You don't suppose that Hak's singapore cane is really an ugly stick that Chastity's been whacked with too many times?
  
  Well, this shows the effectiveness of the Singa^H^H^H^H^HKendo Stick that Hak uses. Beats up opponents and makes women look so ugly you need a caseful of beer before making the move. Kills two birds with one stone!
- Some random thoughts, courtesy of Brian Moynahan:
  Aldo, the Thunder report was great, as always. Couple of things. First, I have to agree with you on the subject of Tenay. Not only does he know the correct names of just about all the moves you can imagine, but he can call more than thirty seconds of action without mentioning the upcoming PPV, or some other story totally related to the match. Even when Tenay does have to plug something (PPV, hotline) he manages to fit it within the framework of the match.
  Also, I agree that it is good to see the "old" Horsemen back. As someone who is fairly new to watching the sport of wrestling, I never got to see Tully, Arn, Ric, and Barry/Ole back when they were badasses. Now, I'm finally getting a chance to see why Bill loves Arn so much. One thing though - who will be the fourth Horsemen? It seems obvious that Mongo couldn't quite cut it, and I've heard some names tossed around: Bret Hart, DDP, Goldberg, Sting, and Saturn, just to name a few. I personally am thinking DDP, considering several things. One, he has recently started to turn to a heel, at the same time as the Horsemen. Two, he has seemingly been feuding with Flair for the last few weeks. And three, why else would he be in the four corner match? Granted, he is a very good wrestler, but there are a lot of very good wrestlers in WCW.
  Finally, why doesn't WCW stop using active wrestlers as its bookers? This obviously is not working (although recent matches have been very good, in my opinion). They need to look around and find someone who knows about wrestling, but won't play favorites. True, it may be only a fantasy, but someone like that must exist.
  
  This may bring out the "mark" in me, but I'll say it anyway. I enjoy seeing the Horsemen of old come out. Even though we know they will meet their end at the hands of Hogan and friends, it's nice to see actual heels running amuck instead of stables like the Wolfpac that try to get over with the crowd while beating up people.
  As for DDP, that's always a possibility. On that note, I was surprised when he won the belt at the PPV, not so much because I didn't think he could do it, but because of the four participants I figured DDP would be the one to eat the pin. Although I dislike his interviews and wish he had more of a wrestling arsenal, DDP is a decent worker and has paid his dues in the business, and it's good to see him hold some heavyweight gold for all he's endured.
  However, a few of the sheets are rampant with speculation that DDP is going to put over Kevin Nash at Slamboree. Only at the next PPV will we find out the truth to these claims. In any case, I am hoping the two can work in a good feud before the booker holds the top title in the promotion.
- Mat sheds some light on the use of Riki "The Son of Suck" Rachman:
  I got it! I got it! I got it!
  I know what Riki Rachtman is doing in WCW...
  WCW and WWF like to copy some of the other federation's talent (and I use the term loosely)...
  I think Riki's supposed to be...Shane McMahon!!
  Yeah? Yeah?
  Everybody pray they don't make Riki the TV Champ...
  
  I am already seeing a vision about how WCW is going to have Benoit put Rachman over at The Great American Bash. :(
A shout out goes to "Beautiful" Bobby Eaton for a signed autograph photo I received the other day. Also, thanks go out to some Bill guy for sending the photo.
Opening montage.
We are LIVE from a certain arena in a certain city for a certain second-tier wrestling show!
- Tonight, Rey Mysterio, Jr. takes on Juventud Guerrera in a Cruiserweight Title defense.
- The crowd sounds like they're booing.
- However, Larry Zbyzsko gets cheers when he takes his bows.
- We'll also get an update on Hogan's injury.
Match #1: El Vampiro vs. Buff Bagwell
- Hey, Xavier, does this answer your question? :)
- Zbyzsko runs down Schiavone as Buff's music plays.
- Your referee is "The Man Who Calls It Down the Middle" Charles Robinson.
  - I know, that name's taken already. But I felt like saying it. :)
- Buff mocks a Karate Kid Crane pose to start.
- Buff then dances to waste more time.
- Zzzz...
- Lockup, Buff breaks clean in the corner.
- Buff does another Crane.
- Buff does an armdrag takedown.
- Lockup, Buff applies a single-leg takedown and laughs at Vampiro.
- Lockup, Vampiro gets Buff to the corner.
- Buff blocks a punch and hits one of his own.
- Vampiro sent to the corner.
- Buff charges and tries a monkey flip but Vampiro lands on his feet.
- Vampiro sends Buff down with a kick.
- In the corner, Vampiro lands a chop.
- Vampiro comes off the ropes with a clothesline.
- Vampiro lands a headbutt.
- Near the ropes, Vampiro hits some palm thrusts.
- Vampiro applies a headlock on the top rope.
- Vampiro with another chop.
- The crowd is giving it to Vampiro tonight.
- Buff ducks a clothesline and hits a standing dropkick.
- Buff does a variation of Kidman's spinebomb.
- Buff goes on the turnbuckle and hits the ten punches in the corner.
- Vampiro picks up Buff and hot-shots him on the top rope.
- Vampiro comes off the ropes with a spinning heel kick for two.
- Vampiro sits on Buff at the middle rope.
- Vampiro applies a judo takedown followed by a cross armbreaker.
- Vampiro does a left front kick to Buff's chest.
- Vampiro lands another boot to the chest.
- Buff tries to fight back, but Vampiro goes for the eyes.
- Vampiro lands a chop.
- Vampiro comes off the ropes and puts Buff in a headlock.
- Vampiro, however, just brings Buff into the corner though. O-kay.
- Vampiro lands some kicks followed by a snapmare and a kick to the back.
- Buff becomes the proud recipient of a boot to the groin.
- Vampiro kicks Buff on the back of his leg and sends him down with another kick.
- Vampiro applies a chinlock.
- Buff gets to his feet and hits some back elbows but a kick to the chest sends him down again.
- Vampiro with a side slam.
- Vampiro applies an anklelock.
- Buff's shoulders go on the mat for a two-count.
- Both men to feet, Buff goes down after two kicks.
- Vampiro tries to suplex Buff, but Buff counters into a Tully Blanchard-style slingshot suplex!
- Buff lands some fists.
- Buff whips Vampiro into a powerslam.
- Buff floors Vampiro with a running clothesline.
- Buff goes up top but is caught by Vampiro.
- Vampiro does the Rock Bottom for two.
  - I know this isn't the WWF, but oh well. :)
- Vampiro puts Buff on the turnbuckle for a frankensteiner, but Buff doesn't budge as Vampiro flips.
- Buff then seizes the opportunity to hit his Blockbuster for the win.
- YOUR WINNER: Buff Bagwell via Blockbuster in 10:06.
Match #2: Jerry Flynn vs. Wrath
- Flynn comes out to work his 13^th minute of fame in WCW.
- Wrath comes out. Same squash, different combatant.
- Your referee is Billy Silverman.
- Lockup, Wrath shoves Flynn to the corner.
- Lockup, Wrath brings Flynn to the corner.
- Flynn trips Wrath with a single leg.
- Wrath comes off the ropes with a flying shoulderblock.
- Wrath sends Flynn to the floor.
- Wrath hits a couple chops.
- Wrath shoots Flynn to the rail.
- Next week, Hollywood Hulk Hogan is scheduled for knee surgery, in case anyone cares.
- Flynn levels Wrath with a clothesline.
- Flynn shoots Wrath to the rail.
- Wrath hits a kneelift before sending Flynn back in.
- Wrath goes up top and hits a flying clothesline for two.
- Wrath applies a snapmare then does a blatant chokehold.
- Wrath punches Flynn in the chin.
- Wrath sends Flynn outside through the ropes.
- Wrath rakes the eyes but Flynn fights back.
- Wrath does another eye rake and sends Flynn to the rail.
- Silverman calls for the bell and we have a DOUBLE COUNTOUT at 3:33.
- Wrath shoots Flynn to the ringside stairs.
- Both men grapple as Silverman tries to break them up.
- Flynn finally gets out of dodge.
- That was the most pointless booking I have seen in a while, by the way. (Editor's Note: It was later realized that Wrath blew his knee out, which accounted for the odd finish.)
Promo for the WCW Mastercard.
Local commercial with Dox Hendrix plugging the WWF RAW show at the Orlando Arena on May 10^th. Tickets go on sale April 20^th.
Match #3: Horace vs. Meng
- Horace Hogan comes out for his nightly dose of nepotism.
- He'll be facing... Meng. This is going to be scary to report.
- Your referee is Randy "Pee Wee" Anderson.
- Lockup, Meng pummels away on Horace in the corner.
- Horace fights back and sends Meng to the turnbuckle.
- Meng headbutts himself on the turnbuckle to show what a badass he is.
- Meng whips Horace, who does a sunset flip for two.
- Meng hits a side kick for two.
- Zbyzsko calls Meng a discredit to the scientific community.
  - Meng reminds me of the stock market. Like stock brokers, when people watch this guy wrestle, they yell, "Sell! Sell! Sell!"
- Meng chops Horace in the bank and does a choke.
- Meng sends Horace out to the floor and shoots him to the rail.
- Horace lands a boot to the face.
- Horace tries a running splash but flies into the rail when Meng moves out of the way.
- Meng breaks the ten count by going in and out of the ring.
- Meng no-sells a chop and beats on Horace.
- Back in, Horace takes control.
- Punch, punch, kick, kick, whip.
- Meng reverses the whip and does a powerslam for two.
- Meng does another choke.
- Meng whips Horace and hits a standing dropkick for two.
- Meng no-sells some offense and lands some chops.
- Horace with some blows to the head.
- Meng misses a chop, allowing Horace to apply the shittiest atomic drop in the history of atomic drops.
- Horace lands a clothesline.
- Horace sends Meng over the top rope with a lariat.
- Horace then does a suicide dive between the top and middle ropes!
- Back in, Horace applies a suplex for two.
- Horace tries a scoop slam but Meng turns it into a small package for two.
- Horace sends Meng to the corner and hits a clothesline.
- Horace with another clothesline.
- Horace then goes off the ropes and does Uncle Terry's Leg Drop of Doom for two.
- Horace gets whipped to the ropes and tries a sunset flip.
- Meng struggles to stay up then applies the Tongan Death Grip for the win.
- YOUR WINNER: Meng via Tongan Death Grip in 6:02.
- Post-match, Meng speaks some garbage in the camera and drools.
- I wonder who would sell less moves, Meng or Hacksaw Jim Duggan. Or, do I even want to know?
Backstage, Ric Flair, Arn Anderson, and Charles Robinson converse.
- Robinson is pouring champagne for Natch and The Enforcer.
- A WCW employee named Georgia hands Flair some papers to sign.
- Anderson argues to Flair over his signing the papers before reading them.
- Anderson wants to get the documents from Georgia, but Flair is confident that he did the right thing.
It's a new look for WCWSN, but the same jobber matches! This weekend, you'll get Bam Bam Bigelow, Wrath, and Chris Benoit/Dean Malenko vs. Rey Mysterio, Jr./Kidman.
Match #4: Mikey Whipwreck vs. Disco Inferno
- Generic rock music brings out "If I Could Job Like" Mikey Whipwreck.
- Disco comes out. Sorry, Mike.
- Lockup, Disco gets in a headlock.
- Disco comes off the ropes with a shoulderblock.
- Lockup, Mikey has a headlock applied.
- Mikey comes off the ropes and applies an armdrag.
- Mikey does another armdrag and puts on an armbar.
- Disco lands some kicks on Mikey near the ropes.
- Mikey again goes for the armdrag into an armbar.
- Disco kicks Mikey and trips him, holding onto his leg.
- Mikey uses both legs to kick Disco away.
- Mikey with YET ANOTHER armdrag takedown.
- Disco does a shoulderblock in the corner.
- Mikey sends Disco to the corner but eats an elbow.
- Disco hits a clothesline.
- Disco lands some boots in the corner.
- Disco goes to the middle turnbuckle and hits an elbowdrop for two.
- Disco whips Mikey, misses a clothesline and sends him outside.
- Commercials.
- Promo for the Goldberg and DDP videos.
  - Now THIS is tacky, advertising these videos during a live match.
- We come back to the match at the seven minute mark.
- Supposedly, Disco was serenading the crowd.
- Mikey shoots Disco to the rail.
- Mikey applies a sloppy Russian Legsweep on the rail.
- Disco re-enters the ring and Mikey goes to the apron.
- Mikey goes off the top rope and flips into the ring, snapping Disco's head in the process.
- Mikey covers for two.
- Mikey hits a springboard legdrop for two.
- Mikey whips Disco into a leaping forearm for two.
- Mikey does a scoop slam.
- Mikey goes up top and misses the splash.
- Disco picks up Mikey and applies the piledriver.
- Disco covers... Mikey's leg touches the rope right before the hand drops for three.
- Disco hooks the leg and covers again for two.
- Disco does a blatant choke.
- Disco whips Mikey and hits a boot to the midsection.
- Disco does a weird goosestep and applies a swinging neckbreaker.
- Disco does a snapmare into a chinlock.
- Mikey gets to his feet and elbows out of the hold.
- Disco nails Mikey with an elbow for two.
- Disco with another choke.
- Disco does a scoop slam.
- Disco misses the elbow drop off the second turnbuckle.
- Mikey lands two dropkicks.
- Mikey does the ten punches on the turnbuckle.
- Disco whips Mikey into an inverted atomic drop.
- Disco lands a clothesline for two.
- Disco telegraphs the back body drop, allowing Mikey to do a Rocker Dropper for two.
- Mikey comes off the ropes and Disco puts him in position for an inverted DDT, then twists him around and drops The Last Dance for the win! Impressive!
- YOUR WINNER: Disco Inferno via The Last Dance in 12:55.
Thunder Ringside Release: Plug for the new Eddie Murphy movie Life.
Gene the bald-headed pygmie calls out the nWo B-Team.
- Out comes Stevie Ray, followed by Vince and Brian Adams.
- Horace then brings up the rear clutching his neck after his match with Meng.
- To make a long story short, Stevie Ray berates Mean Gene and says he's overpaid (Yes!), says the black and white will police wrestling, runs down the Wolfpac, and challenges DDP to a heavyweight title fight later this evening.
- Oh yeah. Stevie refers to DDP as a no-good beatnik fruit-booty. Now, I know WCW's G-Rated policies results in goofy insults, but this is ridiculous.
This Week in WCW Motorsports.
- They waste my time by talking about the WCW car's new paint job. Oh yes, this is what I want to see when I watch wrestling.
- Next week, they threaten me with a photo shoot.
- If they really wanted to sell this segment to the fans, WCW should show a clip from many years ago in which an enraged Michael Waltrip punched Lake Speed in the face twice on pit row for causing a wreck. Even the B-Team interview was more interesting than this.
Match #5: Disorderly Conduct vs. Raven and Perry Saturn
- Disorderly Conduct will do the job to...
- Raven and Saturn.
- Raven gets a mic and does his catchphrase.
- Saturn mentions that he would like to accessorize his new outfit with the tag team belts.
- It will be Raven and Mean Mike to start.
- Mike pummels Raven in the corner.
- Mike sends Raven into the corner but runs into a boot.
- Tag to Saturn.
- As Raven trips Mike, Saturn hits a side kick.
- Saturn nails Tuff Tom on the apron and beats on Mike.
- Tag to Raven.
- Saturn whips Mike and as Saturn lands a blow to the midsection, Raven comes in with a kneelift.
- Tag to Tom.
- Raven drop toeholds Tom and takes it to him.
- Tag to Saturn, who goes up top.
- Raven does a gourdbuster as Saturn comes off the top with a rather stiff kneedrop.
- Saturn makes the lazy cover for two.
- Saturn with a backdrop suplex.
- Saturn gets sent to the ropes and is elbowed from behind by Mike.
- Tom now has control and tags to Mike.
- Mike does a scoop slam.
- Mike comes off the ropes with an elbow drop.
- Tag to Tom.
- Mike drapes Saturn on the top ropes and holds his legs while Tom hits an axehandle.
- Saturn tries to fight back but is overcome by the Disorderlies.
- Tom picks up Saturn and tags in Mike.
- Mike drapes Saturn on the top rope and covers for two.
- Saturn gets some elbows in, and comes off the ropes into a Mean Mike knee to the midsection.
- Tag to Tom.
- Tom does a jawbreaker for two.
- Tom whips Saturn into a side slam for two.
- Tom puts Saturn in a headlock, brings him to the heel corner and tags in Mike.
- Mike pummels Raven and holds Saturn for Tom.
- Tom goes up top and nails Mike.
- Saturn applies an overhead release suplex on Tom.
- Tag to Raven.
- Raven becomes a house o' fire.
- Raven sets up a chair and does his drop toehold spot.
- Raven covers for two.
- All four men in the ring.
- Saturn lands some rights on Mike in the corner.
- Raven and Saturn try to whip the Disorderlies into each other but it gets reversed.
- As Saturn does a T-bone suplex on Mike, Raven hits the Evenflow on Tom for the win.
- YOUR WINNERS: Raven and Perry Saturn via Raven's Evenflow DDT in 6:58.
- Good workrate by both teams.
Plug for WCW.com.
From the April 12^th Nitro: Rey Mysterio receives a Horseman-style punking.
Match #6: Juventud Guerrera vs. WCW Cruiserweight Champion Rey Mysterio, Jr.
- It's time for the cruisers!
- Lockup, Juvi breaks in the corner.
- Lockup, Juvi puts on a headlock, goes off the ropes and hits a shoulderblock.
- Juvi comes off the ropes again and lands a couple chops.
- Rey whips Juvi, leaps over him, goes off the ropes and eats a headscissors takedown.
- Rey takes down Juvi with the armdrag and applies an armbar.
- Rey whips Juvi, who tries a sunset flip.
- Rey gets out and does a bridge for two.
- Juvi tries a powerbomb but Rey squirms out.
- Juvi settles for a clothesline instead.
- Rey comes off a whip and hits a spinning flying headscissors takedown.
- Juvi ends up outside.
- Rey catches Juvi on the apron and flips Juvi into the ring.
- Juvi, landing on his feet, goes to the ropes and applies a tilt-a-whirl slam.
- Rey whips Juvi and kicks his leg, sending him flying into the ropes.
- Juvi bounces off the ropes and Rey sits on his shoulders.
- Rey lands some punches and headscissors Juvi over the top rope!
- Commercials.
- We come back at the 6:45 mark with Rey in the corner.
- Juvi taunts the crowd and hits a chop.
- Juvi sends Rey to the corner but misses the splash.
- Juvi whips Rey to the corner, who floats over but gets chopped.
- Juvi goes to the turnbuckle and gets sent belly first to the mat when Rey trips his leg.
- Rey does the Bronco Buster in the corner.
- Rey goes up top and Juvi picks him up for a running powerbomb, but Rey rolls him up for two.
- Juvi does a variation of an inverted DDT for two.
- Rey gets whipped but does a baseball slide under Juvi and a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker.
- Juvi hits a clothesline and blows a kiss to the crowd.
- Rey gets sent to the ropes and does the Fake Out.
- Juvi charges at Rey, gets flipped to the apron and applies a throatbreaker on the ropes.
- Juvi with a springboard legdrop.
- Juvi drops the Latino Elbow for two.
- Nick Weber adds:
  Juvi can't imitate it as well as Mankind, but, that was still pretty good, if ya smell-la-la-la... what Juvi... is cookin'.
- Rey gets whipped and goes to the second rope to bounce on Juvi's shoulders.
- Rey shoves Juvi into the corner.
- A series of reversals by both men lead to the Juvidriver.
- Juvy sets Rey up for the 450 Splash and goes up top.
- Rey strikes Juvi's foot, tripping him.
- Rey goes up top and is shoved off.
- Rey goes up again and does a top-turnbuckle frankensteiner WITH AUTHORITY for the win!
- YOUR WINNER: Rey Mysterio, Jr. via top-turnbuckle frankensteiner in 12:11.
- Good match!
Backstage, Flair and Robinson speak.
- Robinson compares Ric Flair's last match to the famous Flair/Steamboat encounter.
- Arn Anderson comes in and harps about Georgia not being around.
- Anderson kicks Robinson out of his chair and tells him to find Georgia.
- More dissension is teased here.
At 9:57 P.M. EDT we get the fireworks.
Match #7: Stevie Ray (w/ Vince) vs. WCW World Heavyweight Champion Diamond Dallas Page (w/ Kimberly)
- I smell a quick main event here.
- Kimberly leads out her man for this world title defense.
- Say, are those jellybeans sticking out of Kim's chest? Just wondering...
- Randy "Pee Wee" Anderson is your referee.
- Vince taunts DDP as the match starts.
- Slugfest ensues.
- DDP sends Stevie out with a forearm.
- DDP slingshots out to the floor landing on Stevie and Vince!
- Both men brawl near the entryway and announcers booth.
- Vince enters the fray and gets sent down.
- Stevie attacks DDP from behind and both men re-enter the ring.
- Stevie lands a double cross chop to DDP's throat.
- Stevie whips DDP into a clothesline.
- Stevie applies a bear hug.
- DDP slaps Stevie in the temple to get out.
- DDP comes off the ropes into a Stevie Ray side slam for two.
- DDP gets whipped but manages a swinging neckbreaker.
- DDP with some fists and his discus lariat.
- Vince gets a punch, too.
- DDP walks into a kick.
- Stevie whips DDP and sets up for the Slapjack.
- DDP does a back body drop to escape and goes off the ropes.
- DDP floats over Stevie and spins around for the Diamond Cutter.
- DDP then covers as Vince stands there like an idiot.
- YOUR WINNER: Diamond Dallas Page via Diamond Cutter in 4:45.
- Post match, Vince attacks DDP from behind.
- Horace and Brian Adams come from the back to help Vince out.
- Adams and Vince whip DDP to the ropes.
- DDP ducks a double clothesline and hits one of his own on the heels.
- DDP clotheslines Adams over the top rope.
- Vince clubs DDP from help but eats a Cutter.
- Kim comes in the ring to celebrate with DDP.
- Fade to black.
The Good: Rey Mysterio, Jr. vs. Juventud Guerrera. The Raven/Saturn vs. Disorderlies match also had a good workrate.
The Bad: What was the point behind booking a double countout with a random match such as Wrath vs. Jerry Flynn? Furthermore, Meng vs. Horace was kind of awful, and I don't see why we're supposed to care about the nWo B-Team.
The Ugly: Much like the Horsemen attacking Hollywood Hulk Hogan two weeks ago, three men from the nWo B-Team cannot take out one man.

WCW Thunder - Thursday, April 15, 1999

By Aldo

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