- The new cruiserweight champion comes out, accompanied by the reigning Uni^H^H^HCanadian Champion.
- Skipper cuts a pretty bad promo. But, his wrestling is fine for someone of his experience level.
- The Misfit contingent come out with Super Soakers, spraying the crowd.
- Chavo and Hugh get a U. S. A. chant going.
- Chavo reverses a whip and hits a clothesline, followed by a scoop slam and dropkick.
- Chop in the corner.
- And a European uppercut.
- Skipper gets whipped to the corner.
- They do some floatover attempts, and Chavo gets a monkeyflip in.
- Chavo with a backdrop suplex.
- Chavo goes up top, but Storm interferes with the Canadian flag.
- This prompts Hugh to charge Storm, and the two fight into the crowd.
- Skipper gets a chair in the ring but misses a swing.
- Chavo gets the chair, but the referee tries to take it away from him.
- This allows Skipper to load the Grey Cup ring on his hand and punch Chavo for the win.
- YOUR WINNER: "Primetime" Elix Skipper via pinfall in 2:08.
- This had potential to be the match of the night, and they go and ruin it. Go fig.
- Why is this guy on my screen?
- Russo makes a Wizard of Oz reference referring to a local sports team. Scott Hudson then brings up the mid-80s NWA midcard tag team Kansas Jayhawks.
- As Russo rants, Goldberg hits the ring and dumps security.
- Meanwhile, Russo tries to act like a badass in front of Goldberg, making him look weak.
- Russo talks about Goldberg's guaranteed contract.
- Russo shows Goldberg a release form from WCW.
- Russo says if Goldberg signs the form, there will be no problems.
- Goldberg rips up the form and tosses the pen.
- Russo mentions Jeff Jarrett, Kevin Nash and Scott Steiner while begging Goldberg to hit him.
- Russo talks about Goldberg's girlfriend, Beth, and Bill snaps.
- Meanwhile, on the TurnerTron, Scott Steiner breaks into Goldberg's hotel room and kidnaps Beth.
- Umm, not even the doors of a room at a Super 8 break that easy.
- Russo celebrates, but before he can leave, Booker T walks out.
- The announcers play up Nash's heel turn from Thunder.
- Booker tells Russo to deliver a message to Nash: he's going to be so far up his behind it will be hard for him to breathe.
- Is that like Stevie Ray saying this?
- Russo talks about Booker being at the bottom for eight years, where he belongs, so he says.
- Russo tells off Booker, and gets a kneelift for his troubles.
- Booker hits the axe kick, and Russo gets laid out.
- I guess the rumors of Papaya being let go were true.
- Schiavone confirms my darkest fears by saying this is a mixed tag match.
- Oh, damn it all. Was a SINGLES match too much to ask?
- Kwee pounds on Lash.
- Lash whips Kwee into a back bodydrop.
- Lash with the punch/strut/clothesline combo for one when Paisley comes in.
- Lash takes Paisley down.
- Lash whips Kwee into a gut shot.
- Tag to Gunns, who gets a middle rope sunset flip for two.
- Gunns tags Lash, and Kwee gets pissed off.
- Kwee with a slam and some stomps for two.
- Lash with a suplex takeover for two.
- Lash argues with Paisley, allowing Kwee to interrupt from behind...
- But he misses the right hand.
- Lash with a double-leg takedown.
- Lash slingshots Kwee into Paisley and dumps him from the ring.
- Meanwhile, Gunns goes for the running butt to the head and hits turnbuckle, but Paisley sells it anyway.
- Gunns covers, but Kwee pulls Gunns off.
- A bad sequence leads to Gunns slamming Paisley.
- Gunns goes up top and Lash hurls her on Paisley for the win.
- YOUR WINNERS: Lash LeRoux and Major Gunns via pinfall in 2:57.
- To complete this farce, they play the Monday Nitro music instead of the M. I. A. theme.
- Post-match, the heels blindside the winners and beat the crap out of them.
- Note to WCW bookers: Keep the women away from the ring unless they are properly trained!
- Tank debuts a song -- a really bad song.
- So bad that it's actually amusing.
- Tank stops the act and accuses the boys of screwing up.
- Tank walks onto the aisle and lectures Three Count about practicing.
- Meanwhile, Dark Carnival and the Insane Clown Posse knock down Tank and clear the ring.
- Vamp says something about Juggalo Championship Wrestling taking over.
- Vamp "breaks kayfabe" by mentioning Sting's real name. * sigh *
- Apparently, this is an invasion angle, and maybe it might be as successful as the NWA angle was in the WWF!
- Tank gets a mic and challenges Vamp for the JCW Title.
- The NBT hit the ring.
- "Above Average" Mike Sanders talks about the A-1 guys getting above average paychecks despite below average ratings.
- Sanders refers to his group as genetically jacked individuals.
- Sanders puts over his teammates.
- Sanders talks about opportunity, and how they plan to kick the door down.
- The Filthy Animals hit the entryway.
- Konnan: "And I thought Tank Abbott's promos were bad." Hah!
- Konnan cuts a quasi-shoot promo on the rookies.
- The Animals charge the ring and we go to commercial.
- When we come back, Juvi beats on O'Haire in the ring.
- Juvi tries for a dive on O'Haire and gets caught and slammed.
- Tag to Jindrak.
- Jindrak with a clothesline.
- Jindrak tries a whip, but Juvi blocks it.
- Juvi with a bodyscissors into a bulldog.
- Tag to Rey, who hits a gullotine legdrop for two.
- Rey tries a crossbody from the middle rope and gets slammed for two.
- Rey dropkicks Jindrak in the leg.
- Tag to Disco, who gets a drop toehold.
- Rey with a legdrop.
- Disco with an elbowdrop.
- Spinning neckbreaker.
- Jindrak whips Disco into Sanders' knee.
- Meanwhile, Konnan makes fun of the old guys on commentary.
- Sanders tags in O'Haire, and the two hit running kicks.
- Disco reverses a whip to the corner and eats elbow.
- O'Haire goes up top but Disco trips him off.
- O'Haire sends Disco down and covers for two.
- O'Haire with a jawbreaker.
- Tag to Jindrak, who gets a nice flying clothesline in.
- Jindrak whips Disco to the corner but misses the flying splash.
- Disco with a Russian legsweep and an atomic drop.
- Tag to Juvi, who hits a springboard heel kick.
- Juvi with the ten punches in the corner.
- Juvi taunts the heels, allowing Rey to run interference while referee Jamie Tucker is distracted.
- Juvi with a top-rope frankensteiner for two.
- Rey goes up top, but O'Haire kicks him out.
- Jindrak with a suplex and a tag to Sanders.
- Sanders with a legdrop.
- Tag to O'Haire, who gets a powerslam for two.
- O'Haire nails a sitout powerbomb for two.
- Tag to Jindrak.
- Rey ducks under a pair of leapfrogs and hits a tilt-a-whirl takeover.
- Heel miscommunication leads to a Juvi tag.
- Juvi tags in Disco and the two assault Sanders in the corner.
- Rey with the Bronco Buster.
- O'Haire tries to interfere, but Disco takes him down.
- Bronco Buster on O'Haire.
- Jindrak tries the same thing, which results in a Buster from Tygress.
- It breaks down, and Disco and Sanders are left in the ring.
- Sanders with a reverse hangman's noose neckbreaker for the win.
- YOUR WINNERS: Mark Jindrak, Sean O'Haire and "Above Average" Mike Sanders via reverse hangman's noose neckbreaker in 8:15 aired.
- Post-match, Tygress gets set up for a Sean-Ton Bomb.
- Sloppy, but acceptable.
- When your world champion is taking on a rookie and the champ comes out first, something is wrong.
- David Penzer notes no referee and brings one out...
- Vince Russo.
- Cripes.
- If they give this fool the belt...
- Bell rings, and Russo admonishes Booker.
- Booker with a hammerlock.
- Palumbo elbows out and whips Booker...
- But he reverses and nails the Harlem Sidekick.
- Booker with a back elbow off the ropes.
- Palumbo blocks a suplex and tries one of his own...
- But Booker counters with his own suplex.
- Booker reverses a whip into the 110th Street Slam.
- Booker covers, but Russo doesn't count.
- Booker screams at Russo, allowing Palumbo to take control.
- Palumbo covers and gets a quick two-count.
- Palumbo with a vertical suplex for one.
- Palumbo with a kneelift.
- Palumbo whips Booker to the corner, but Booker floats over and sunset flips Palumbo for a five-second one-count.
- Palumbo with a powerslam, and the count is a wee bit faster.
- Palumbo with a surfboard.
- Booker makes the comeback and hits a backdrop suplex.
- Booker blocks Palumbo's punch and hits his own.
- Palumbo with a rake to the eyes.
- Booker comes back with the flapjack.
- Breakdance. Harlem Sidekick.
- Booker sizes down Russo, and the NBT hit the ring.
- Reno hits Roll The Dice on Booker.
- Before the big heel beatdown, Big Vito comes in and clears house.
- Kevin Nash hits the ring and nails Booker with the chair.
- Palumbo covers, but Russo is distracted by Big Vito.
- But, that doesn't matter, because Russo counts a quick three for Palumbo at 6:03.
- The Cat and Ms. Jones walk to the ring.
- Cat says Bischoff put him in the commissioner role, Russo is the writer and thus Cat's equal.
- Cat calls the match as unofficial, and the belt is returned to Booker T.
- Booker says he didn't pin Palumbo, so he doesn't want the belt.
- Cat restarts the match and tells Russo to write his ass out of the ring.
- Cat will be your referee for this bout.
- Palumbo misses a charge to the corner and Booker rolls him up for two.
- Booker with the kneelift.
- Booker with the usual finishing sequence, leading to the Book End for the win.
- YOUR WINNER: Booker T via Book End in 7:25.
- If the goal was to make Chuck Palumbo look like a legit threat to the title, it failed.
- I can't rate this.
- ICP takes over at the announcing booth, in case I haven't been tormented enough tonight.
- This is for the JCW title.
- Vamp tries some kicks, but Tank slams him down.
- Vamp evades a charge and gets a kick in.
- Tank with an armdrag.
- Vamp with some kicks to the leg.
- Tank with a headlock.
- Tank goes for the KO punch, but Vamp ducks and Charles Robinson takes it instead.
- This prompts the Russo Run-In Extravaganza, in this case, ICP hits the ring but they get up by Tank.
- The Great Muta sneaks in from behind with an axehandle and the green mist.
- Heel beatdown follows, and Three Count makes the save.
- Abbott walks away from his boys.
- That was craptastic.
- This was booked because Smiley doesn't want the title. Can't blame him.
- Smiley dumps the contents of the garbage can.
- Clarke shoves Smiley down, and Smiley responds with a kendo stick.
- Clarke goes nucking futs with the stick, and Smiley resorts back to his "Screaming" persona.
- Clarke kicks away in the corner.
- Smiley floats over a charge, wiggles with a trashcan and gets kicked.
- Clarke sends Smiley out of the ring with a shoulderblock.
- Adams mocks Smiley and gets slapped.
- In the ring, Clarke shoves Smiley into an Adams full-nelson slam.
- Clarke hits the Meltdown.
- Adams pulls out a table and brings it into the ring.
- As Clarke sets up the table, the Harris Boys run interference and put Clarke through the table.
- The Harrises put Smiley on top for the win.
- YOUR WINNER: Norman Smiley via pinfall.
- Post-match, Smiley reluctantly takes his title.
- God forbid Smiley is actually made to look good in his matches.
- It's time to play that favorite game of bookers everywhere -- Kill The Midcarder's Heat!
- Lock-up, Nash starts out early.
- The usual stuff -- knees in the corner, elbows, boot choke -- all done at the exciting pace of a snail.
- Vito comes back with a Mafia Kick.
- Vito with a suplex.
- Vito goes up top and hits an elbowdrop for 2.9.
- Vito drops a pair of legs.
- Vito goes up top again and hits a flying headbutt for two.
- Vito pulls the straps down.
- Vito whips Nash to the corner but runs into an elbow.
- Nash with another elbow.
- Nash with a side slam for two.
- Nash hits Snake Eyes.
- Nash with a chokeslam, but no Frankengood impression. :-(
- Cover gets two.
- Nash whips Vito into a big boot.
- And the leg drop gets thr... wait, wrong wrestler.
- Anyway, Nash pulls HIS straps down and gives Vito the powerdrop.
- Production F***-Up #98,451 sees Booker T's music cued after the powerdrop.
- Nash signals for one more, and Booker hits the ring for the DQ.
- YOUR WINNER: Kevin Nash via DQ in 4:04.
- Booker gives Nash the Harlem Sidekick.
- You know, I thought this was relaxed rules because the fans want finishes!
- All kidding aside, Nash actually made Vito look good for a couple minutes, which is more than I expected.
- Storm: "After the reception I received in Canada, I go from first to worst tonight."
- Storm calls for the Canadian anthem.
- Jeff Jarrett walks out.
- The heels tease dissension before the match.
- Here comes the faces, and the match starts.
- Morrus clotheslines Storm.
- Morrus with some punches and kicks.
- Chops in the corner.
- Morrus whips Storm to the corner and hits a charge.
- Morrus with a gorilla press slam.
- Storm comes back with a side kick for two.
- Storm with a jawbreaker.
- Storm whips Morrus into a flying shoulderblock for two.
- Morrus gets whipped into a dropkick for two when Jarrett makes the save.
- Storm eyes Jarrett, allowing Morrus to cover for two.
- Morrus clotheslines Jarrett out of the ring.
- Morrus powerslams Storm and goes up top.
- Morrus misses the diving elbow.
- Storm puts on the Canadian Mapleleaf, but Morrus tags Awesome.
- Awesome clocks Storm.
- Awesome with a sit-out powerbomb for two when Jarrett saves.
- Awesome and Jarrett go outside, leaving Morrus in the ring.
- Morrus with the moonsault but Elix Skipper does the run-in for the match.
- Morrus dumps Skipper and goes outside.
- Awesome enters the ring and goes for the Awesomebomb but Storm slips out.
- Jarrett hits the ring with the guitar, takes a swing...
- And hits Awesome.
- Storm covers for the win.
- YOUR WINNERS: Lance Storm and Jeff Jarrett via pinfall in 3:40.
- Underwhelming.
- The announcers contrast Beth to Midajah, saying that Midajah is a performer while Beth is an innocent bystander.
- After all, what you see in WCW is a work, except for what you see NOW.
- Steiner tells Goldberg to save his girlfriend, who is "petrified." In fact, Beth is so petrified that her only reaction over this terrible matter is to laugh.
- Speak of the Goldberg, and he shall appear.
- And so does Jeff Jarrett -- with a chairshot.
- Jarrett brings Goldberg into the ring for the heel beatdown.
- Booker T hits the ring to even the odds.
- Kevin Nash runs in to deal with Booker.
- Now, Goldberg makes the comeback.
- Rick Steiner hits the ring with a lead pipe.
- Rick pipes away at Goldberg.
- The heels handcuff Goldberg and Booker to the ropes.
- Goldberg is helpless as Scott puts Beth in the Steiner Recliner.
- Scott with a knee and some stomps on Goldberg.
- We fade out at 9:58 P. M.
- Thank God.