WCW Monday Nitro - Monday, 8/24/98

• Trivia #1: Raven's new theme is a knock-off of Nirvana's "Come As You Are." What song served as Raven's entrance music while he was in ECW?
• Trivia #2: The Ultimate Warrior is a former Mr. Georgia. What other current WCW wrestler can make the same claim?
• Disclaimer: This is one of our longest reports as we have a lot of venting to do. Also, Chad, Joyce and Stephen have co-written it and the extra people added extra ideas.
• We will begin with a personal update / shameless plug. Since our last column (06/22), we collaborated on a project with Stephen Adkins of the The Unofficial Bill Goldberg Home Page. We modified our original Chris Jericho feature from DDT Digest and entered a contest from Chris Jericho's Official Home Page. We won the competition and a pair of CJ's tights with our site, The Chris Jericho Conspiracy Theory. In a related note, we are contemplating filing a lawsuit against the writers of There's Something About Mary as the psychotic hitchhiker (Harland Williams) from that movie clearly was familiar with the numerology involved in the Conspiracy Theory.
• Our latest venture is titled Pro Wrestling's Unsolved Mysteries and is our rendition of the old DDT Digest Q and A Forum. In addition, The Wrestling Channel has added us to their lineup. Unfortunately, in conjunction with that agreement, we were forced to comply with a gimmick change and we are now known as the Answer Men. We were hoping to turn heel and don masks as the Three Stogies, but when you are new to a site its not a good idea to argue with the Booker Man.
• The Triple Threat also took a trip to Atlanta where we stayed with our friend Carey. Carey attends the same Woodstock church as Buff Bagwell. We were able to obtain an exclusive interview for DDT Digest. No, not with Buff, but with the ticket taker of the movie theater located in CNN Center adjacent to the WCW editing offices! He informed us that in the past he had seen Hulk Hogan, Eric Bischoff and even Ric Flair! When asked what the penalties would be if we attempted to enter the offices, he informed us that we would be trespassing on private property and prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law. Since this scoop will no doubt be reprinted throughout the web, please give credit to DDT Digest for this exclusive!
• While at the movie theater, we viewed Disturbing Behavior. Contrary to popular belief, this is not a biographical account of Scott Hall's recent past. WCW has been criticized for not punishing Hall for an incident in Louisiana. Our theory is that the WCW executives realize that releasing his middle name of Oliver to the public was punishment enough. (Note: No offense to actor Oliver Platt, director Oliver Stone or Oliver J. Gulley III, contributor to the WCW Drinking Game.) On the WWF's side, Vince McMahon has shown great restraint by not debuting a new heel named Oliver G. Roper. For those unfamiliar with this incident, here is the 07/31 press release:

  Pro wrestler arrested

  A professional wrestler in Baton Rouge for a performance was arrested Thursday morning after he allegedly groped a woman outside a hotel, city police said.

  Scott Oliver Hall, 39, of Chuluota, Fla., was issued a misdemeanor summons for simple battery and disturbing the peace by public intoxication after the 9:30 a.m. incident, Cpl. Don Kelly said.

  A 56-year-old woman told police she was waiting for a co-worker in her car outside the Radisson Hotel on Constitution Avenue when she saw Hall standing near her car door, Kelly said. She recognized him and rolled down her window to speak to him, Kelly said.

  Hall allegedly reached into the car, grabbed her breast and pulled her hand up near his crotch, Kelly said. He was arrested at his hotel room, Kelly said.

  Hall could not be reached for comment Thursday.

  The hotel did not show him to be registered there, a desk clerk said.

• Behavior like this may have helped Hall get over as a heel which has led some to believe the incidents are all pre-planned because Hall was receiving strong babyface reactions despite being in the heel faction of the nWo. Another of Hall's recent antics involved allegedly vandalizing the luchadors cars for no apparent reason in Cedar Rapids, Iowa (08/09/98). Due to the fact that the cars in question were reported as rental automobiles, we believe Juventud Guerrera's '68 El Camino remained unscathed (reference-Chris Jericho speech, 02/09/98 Nitro.
• Chad has concluded that hall had an ulterior motive for his attack on the luchador cars. He feels there was animosity between the two sides as Hall wants to be a Chicano and the luchadors harbored resentment against him for it. The attack was Hall's way of retaliating for their animosity.
• Speaking of luchadors, WCW is apparently very upset with La Parka. In a match on 7/20/98, La Parka defeated Pierroth in a mask vs. mask match in Nuevo Laredo Torero. This strictly violated his WCW contract which forbade him from working Mexican dates without permission. Psicosis seconded Pierroth, while Vampiro seconded Parka, though they were not punished because they did not wrestle. Unfortunately, the reason WCW cited for preventing the luchadors from working Mexican dates came to pass. La Parka re-injured the same knee he hurt on the 06/01/98 Nitro while Goldberg was on his way to 94-0.
• In other luchador news, Mark Madden reported on the WCW Hotline (08/21/98) that Eddy Guerrero's worked shoot on Nitro will lead to his captaining a Mexican contingent that will include the majority of the luchadors excluding Konnan. In his report, Madden also admitted that the interview was a work.
• Most fans had come to this conclusion on their own citing the facts that Eddy did not violate company policy as he refrained from the use of the word @$$ ("you can take this job and shove it up your you know what.") nor did he mention the WWF by name ("I may say my piece on another show."). To our knowledge it remains against company policy to curse on the air, though WCW has been lenient with this lately, particularly in Bret Hart's case. Most also realized that Guerrero's microphone would probably have been cut had he been voicing an unplanned opinion. (Note: Who would have thought Eddy Guerrero would be the WCW wrestler to reference Johnny Paycheck?)
• For the record, there was a point to Eddy throwing the "coffee" on himself and "saving Bischoff the trouble," since several months ago, in a fit of rage, Bischoff legitimately threw a cup of coffee in Guerrero's direction during an argument. The coffee also could have symbolized that Kevin Nash, a lesser worker, got over by splashing the Giant's face with the liquid earlier in the year. Also, it has long been an inside joke among the wrestling industry that while employed by Verne Gagne's American Wrestling Association, Bischoff's chief responsibilities were menial tasks such as fetching Gagne's coffee for him. Larry Zbyszko alluded to this on the 01/13/97 Nitro when he chastised Bischoff saying he should be careful or "you'll be mowing Verne Gagne's lawn again!"
• Despite most realizing this was an angle, WCW continued to attempt to swerve people throughout the week. On Tuesday, (08/18/98) on the John Boy & Billy Show, Gene Okerlund speculated that Guerrero would be "working for Vince" soon. Then on Thunder, WCW edited out a match that was taped on 08/13/98 in Fargo, North Dakota, in which Guerrero defeated Lizmark, Jr. This was probably because it would not comply with the angle but it may have been a way to work the smarts into believing the match was dropped because Eddy was now unemployed.
• This angle appears to be the beginning of the wrestler vs. management angle that Eric Bischoff had wanted to use with Ric Flair. It was to be patterned similar to the Steve Austin-Vince McMahon confrontations in the World Wrestling Federation. The downfall of using Guerrero in this role is that he is not Ric Flair or Steve Austin. His status is not as great as either. It is realistic for Vince McMahon to employ Steve Austin despite personal tension because Austin is so valuable to the company. In truth, the loss of Eddy Guerrero would have little effect on WCW. Also, both Austin and Flair receive strong babyface reactions regardless of their actions. This is not the case with Eddy as at one point the fans began chanting "Eddy Sucks" and Guerrero had to pause his soliloquy and acknowledge "this has nothing to do with you people" while pointing to crowd.
• Eddy's worked shoot on last week's Nitro also receives our vote for the worst use of props in a wrestling segment in 1998. First, he brought out his luggage. Why would he do this? It served no purpose in the segment particularly since he left them on the floor as he entered the ring. Since Chris Jericho revealed that Lenny Lane stole his precious Lover Boy tape on the 03/23/98 Nitro, we suppose it gives Eddy a reason to be protective of his possessions. His other prop was a glass containing the clear liquid which he referred to as "coffee." This made it ineffective when he threw it on himself. Did anyone else find it illogical that a man threw a liquid on himself while holding a live microphone? In our opinion, the entire segment came off flat. I guess, Eddy now knows how Spice feels.
• Speaking of breasts, what do the Sable Bomb and the Atom Bomb (the actual bomb, not Bryan Clarke) have in common? Answer: A chief component in each is silicon. (Note: That entire paragraph was inserted to use the segue "speaking of breasts." Aren't we always?)
• Mark Madden reported that Clarke was slated to re-emerge on last week's Nitro but his appearance was shelved (Reference- WCW Hotline, 08/21/98). Most believe it was due to time constraints after Warrior's 18-minute tirade. Many felt WCW ineffectively used Warrior's debut to garner ratings as they gave him no build-up but this proved inaccurate as The Warrior segment drew a 6.4 rating, more than doubling the 3.1 rating for the Bart Gunn - Godfather match on Raw. Actually, ratings were probably helped by the length of the segment because viewers who alternate between the programs could at least catch part of the speech.
• One point we found interesting in his rant was the line, "But different than you [Hogan] may remember, and albeit you may have beaten myths, legends, giants, and other great men, you NEVER, NEVER beat a warrior...AND, CERTAINLY, NOT THE ULTIMATE ONE!" This statement was made in this manner as Warrior is forbidden to use the expression "Ultimate Warrior." He did, however, win a suit giving him the rights to the "Warrior" name. This is why in Thursday, 08/20/98's Vince McMahon AOL chat transcript the following sequence occurred:

  Question: Hey, Vince... how does it strike you that Warrior won his case with you?
  McMahon: He hasn't yet.

  The other intriguing factor in the statement is that Hogan never defeated the Road Warriors either, despite both being stars for many years. To be technical, Hogan has beaten a "Warrior" since he did wrestle on the winning teams in the 1995 (09/17/95) and 1996 (09/15/96) War Games and technically every competitor in those bouts could be deemed a warrior.
• For younger fans, the only bout that ever took place between the two occurred as the main event at WrestleMania VI in Toronto (04/01/90). Warrior moved out of the way before getting hit with Hogan's Legdrop Of Doom© and shortly after hit his finishing splash to become the first man to hold the WWF Intercontinental and World Championships simultaneously. After the bout, figurehead president Jack Tunney deemed the bout too grueling for a rematch and thus far his ruling has stood.
• Warrior's "coat of many colors" allegedly hides the fact that he has lost his super human physique, though he is obviously in excellent condition. This along with Rick Rude's deteriorating presence puts a damper on our dreams of a rematch of their "Super Pose Down" at the 1989 Royal Rumble (01/15/89) in Houston, Texas.
• For those who do not know, Warrior exited through the ring. When the ring lit up with smoke, it was obvious that Warrior dropped through the ring. You could actually see the outside of the door opening on the "Monday Nitro" logo on the mat through the "M." Also, fans live at the arena pointed underneath the mat to allude to the Warrior's location. He remained there for the remainder of the program.
• After his appearance there was immediately a great deal of speculation as to what Warrior's future holds. On Tuesday, Gene Okerlund and Scoops reported that Warrior would found the One Warrior Nation (oWn) whose acronym is the inverse of the nWo. Later, Mark Madden reported on the WCW Hotline on Friday that there is already speculation that Warrior's last match in WCW will be a loser-leaves match in which Warrior will job to Randy Savage. We will believe that when we see it. In any event, if this were to happen Savage would avenge a loss in a "retirement match" at WrestleMania VII from Los Angeles (03/23/91). In the 20:48 bout, Savage hit his elbow drop five times, yet the Warrior still managed to prevail.
• Goldberg has already been affected by Warrior's presence. In fact, he may no longer be considered the company's top babyface. Considering Warrior-Hogan or bouts involving them will dominate the main events in WCW for the conceivable future, Goldberg, the World Champion's wait for the pay-per-view spotlight will probably be prolonged. In fact, he is not among the nine men at Fall Brawl. from appearing in the main events. Also, on last week's Nitro he had the first match of his career that he did not win via pinfall, with the exception of a match against Disco Inferno for the TV Title that went to a no-contest about 10 months ago.
• The truly scary thought regarding Warrior's tirade is that it may have been as much of a shoot as Guerrero's. While we agree with the consensus that the segment was solid, it took the president four minutes to apologize for committing adultery, purgery and lying to his family while it took the Warrior 18 minutes to announce his return to wrestling. What's wrong with this picture?
• We were disappointed that Warrior did not make his traditional sprint to the ring and shake the ropes. We suppose WCW is saving his energy so he may now be able to more effectively execute both of his holds. Warrior did do something many thought was impossible in his WCW debut, by finding a practical purpose for the Booty Disciple. Who knows, maybe Ed Harrison Leslie really does paint Hogan's beard for him...
• On the negative side, after the Bat Signal silhouette during an obvious attempt to present Warrior as a super hero, WCW is setting themselves up for a letdown if they do not supply a Warrior-mobile. It would be an excellent investment as it would not only add to Warrior's character it might be the only way Lance Hooper could actually qualify for a race. As Wade speculated last week after Warrior's Rain Man (1988) diatribe, having the Warrior drive would probably not be a good idea.
• The other main discussion regarding the 08/17/98 Nitro stems from WCW's commentating team. Tony Schiavone made comments such as "You're only going to get 10 seconds on some other channel tonight." This was obviously a reference to Raw being taped. They also claimed the program was taped "a few weeks ago" when in reality it had been taped six days earlier. This was particularly ironic since these comments were made in the first week that Thunder reverted to the taping sequence that Raw uses.
• These comments were also ludicrous as WCW main events are typically short and have inconclusive endings. On this night, that was just the case as Goldberg scored a disqualification victory in approximately three minutes. Ironically the Raw main event did not even begin until Nitro was off of the air, so Schiavone's attempts to sabotage its rating were probably fruitless. For the record, Raw's five-minute overrun with the main event scored a 5.4 rating. Nitro's one-minute overrun did a 6.3 rating.
• Furthermore, while Raw was taped, the commentary for it was done live in a studio in Connecticut leaving Jim Ross an opening to retort. Ross corrected Schiavone with the claim that the Austin-Undertaker appearance was "not a match, but a confrontation." Also, during the DX match, Ross claimed that the WWF "gives you action, not a debate" in reference to the Warrior's long spiel.
• In any event, WCW's announcing team is absolutely horrendous. Eric Bischoff has taken to giving them the angles prior to happening, as is done on Raw, because the announcers did not know what spin to put on certain angles. There has been a great deal of speculation that WCW will restructure their announcing team prior to year's end and that one of the many announcers may end up getting the pink slip. Monday's performance may only quicken the process.
• In our opinion, the greatest assessment of WCW's horrid announcing actually came right here at DDT Digest. In the 08/13/98 Thunder Report Jeremy claimed Lee Marshall is "WCW's best TV announcer (seriously)." That just about says it all for the sad state of the WCW announcing team. Dusty Rhodes needn't order anyone to gag with WCW's crew as most fans do it naturally. If only Rhodes himself would return to the booth to renew the standards they had previously set...
• In Schiavone's defense, he did coin the phrase "literally a cake walk." Also, reportedly Schiavone is as heavy as he has ever been in his life and is taking measures to eliminate this problem. Matt feels Schiavone should sue WCW over becoming fat. He could cite the Jim Ross case as an incriminating precedent. Could the DDT Digest Legal Advisor tell us if he has a valid case?
• With Guerrero, Warrior and the WCW announcing team stealing most of the press, one segment that went under appreciated was the Scott Steiner-Buff Bagwell-Cecil Schwartz interview. To the close observer, Buff showed his support of Chan and Charlie and Matt. Buff, sporting Tommy Hilfiger jeans on Nitro, repeatedly gave the Triple Threat hand signal while holding the microphone. Since he has no ties to ECW, he must have been signaling us. He also claimed that Cecil Schwartz was "the greatest doctor in the world" three rimes during the segment. Coincidence? We think not.
• Scott having the left half of body taped in the segment reminded us of when Roddy Piper painted half black and half white claiming he may revert to the dark side.
• It would be cool if Scott Steiner had a gas problem. Since his nickname is Big Poppa Pump and Big Poppa can be abbreviated B.P. which is a gas, it would be like gas pump. Nevermind.
• Who was Cecil Schwartz? We have read that he was the keyboard player from the nWo Nite Cap segments. To be honest, we channel surfed during these segments so we are uncertain. (Note: DDP receives our vote for Humanitarian of the Year for destroying Bischoff's Nite Cap set.) Also of note is that his character appears to have been patterned after the Doctor in Independence Day. Can anyone confirm?
• By the way, for those who do not know, the reason the Scott Steiner-Rick Steiner match at Road Wild was postponed because Rick is still sidelined with a shoulder injury and Scott is still nursing his bad back. But according to James J. Dillon, they will finally have a match at the next pay-per-view!
• Regarding Dillon, we have produced evidence that James J. Dillon was not always Satanic in nature. We may have even found the bout in which he was corrupted. On the tape of the first ever War Games bout, Dillon's last name is spelled "D-I-L-L-I-O-N," which is spelled with seven letters. He took a beating and surrendered the match for his team. Perhaps it was then that his life was changed.
• The WWF is not allowing WCW to even corner the market in developing a Satan figure. Commentators have taken to labeling Kane "Hell spawn." According to WWF storyline, this would make Paul Bearer Satan.
• We have a theory on an economical deal regarding Bearer's "son" Kane. There have been rumors that Devon Storm may be hired as a physical therapist and a wrestler? We wonder if Kane (Isaac Yankem, DDS) handles the WWF's dentistry. Matt feels this is logical as he would not have attended four years of imaginary dental school for nothing.
• Earlier we mentioned that the dream Super Posedown rematch will probably not occur. On a more positive note, WCW has the makings of a dream match. With Pepe the hobby horse debuting on the 06/29/98 Nitro, WCW now has the capacity for a battle of Pepe's pitting Steve "Mongo" McMichael's former chihauhau against the hobby horse. (Note: To those who have seen Dirty Works, McMichael was definitely doing the dog.) This Pepe match will probably not take place as such a high-profile bout would certainly secure upper-card status in WCW and Hogan would probably veto the bout as he does not like competitors with a superior workrate working near him on the card.
• On the 01/05/98 Nitro from Atlanta, Ric Flair claimed he once could have carried a broomstick to a good match, does that apply to hobby horses? Speaking of "The Nature Boy," one of Micasa's readers sent in a most ironic clip from an 11/19/97 Eric Bischoff Prodigy Chat. Here is the excerpt:

  Question: Internet fans have been mostly supportive of the WWF in the past. Were you surprised at the overwhelming negative reaction they got regarding the Bret Hart situation. Even long-time WWF fans are fed up and expressing outrage.
  Eric Bischoff (Speaker): No, I wasn't surprised. In fact, the only thing I was surprised about was that Vince McMahon didn't consider the type of fallout that was to come of his decision. Wrestling fans are incredibly loyal and a demanding lot. They are willing to put up with a lot of bizarre/questionable decisions, both from a creative and business point of view...but when you stoop as low as McMahon did with someone held in as high a regard as Bret Hart or a Ric Flair, then you are clearly underestimating the loyalty of your fan base. That's what surprised me the most.

• It it any wonder the WWF made significant strides in the ratings war without Flair in the fold. Another factor is the lack of actual wrestling in WCW. The NWA, WCW's predecessor, promoted its shows with the slogan "The NWA: We Wrestle." WCW could be sued for false advertising if they made the same claim.
• After the WWF finally caught WCW in the ratings war, it went virtually unnoticed when the WWF completely upstaged WCW in the "Saved by the Bell" war. WCW had held the lead since hiring Zack Morris-look-a-like referee Charles Robinson in November 1997. The WWF finally countered on the initial broadcast of Sunday Heat (08/03/98) when they brought in the real A.C. Slater (Mario Lopez)!
• The WWF has not begun to tap the virtually unlimited potential of A.C. Slater. Obviously he has extensive knowledge of amateur wrestling. Despite this stellar performance, his performance against Marvin Nedick (Gino De Mauro) in Episode 9.10 (#6323): "Pinned to the Mat" (10/14/89) was unforgettable. His credibility may have been tarnished after he inexplicably renounced a scholarship to the University of Iowa (Episode 12.5 (#6378): "Wrestling With The Future" 10/10/92) for a lackluster stint at California University. If his credibility cannot recover, perhaps he could enlist his services as an instructor at Dory Funk's Funking Dojo. He proved in Episode 11.14 (#6355): "Hold Me Tight" (11/23/91) that he has excellent rapport with trainees as he taught female grappler Kristy Barnes (Krystee Clark) holds. Chad feels we would be remiss if we failed to note that Barnes' victory was over Skipper Skulnick, who incidentally went unbilled in doing one of the biggest jobs in history. Furthermore, if either of those methods failed, the WWF could use him to taunt Hollywood Hogan. His performance as Slammer Slater, a disgruntled aging wrestler specifically patterned after Hogan, in Episode 9.10 (#6323): "Pinned to the Mat" (10/14/89) will not soon be forgotten. The viewer could easily sense Hogan's pathetic state from watching. (Note: This paragraph was used to refute any rumors that we may have obtained a life since our last column.)
• Now if only they could find Rodriguez, reigning nerd-toss champion, to handle Tenay...
• The WWF and WCW also battled it out for country music supremacy. The WWF landed a Sawyer Brown performance at In Your House: Unforgiven (04/26/98), while WCW retaliated with Travis Tritt's concert at Road Wild (08/08/98).
• Another ridiculous war the WWF and WCW may be waging is to see who can produce the best vampire character. WCW debuted Vampiro from AAA on the 06/29/98 Nitro having him defeat Brad Armstrong. In Friday's Hotline Report Mark Madden noted that he will reemerge soon and will play more of a romantic vampire a la Tom Cruise and Brad Pitt in Interview With A Vampire (1994). Meanwhile in the WWF, Gangrel (Dave Heath) debuted on the 08/17/98 Sunday Heat. Gangrel actually has sharpened "fangs," but it is difficult to get past the fact that Gangrel once married Luna Vachon. Neither federation developed these characters as WCW's vampire wrestled previously in AAA while Heath has paraded for years as Vampire Warrior. Do you think it is any coincidence that the main federations took notice just prior to Wesley Snipe's vampire flick Blade debuting in theaters (08/19/98)?
• Another wrestling couple that will supposedly be married soon is Chyna and Hunter Hearst Helmsley. They will supposedly be married on 11/21/98.
• Hear ye! Hear ye! Let it be known that Matt liked the 08/13/98 edition of Thunder.
• In last week's Nitro Report, Wade mentioned that he had not seen the finish of the Page-Hart match recently. Actually, the WWF used it in a very prolific match between Ken Shamrock and Rocky Maivia at the 1998 Royal Rumble from San Jose, California (01/18/98). Shamrock defeated Maivia but the decision was reversed when the referee found a pair of brass knuckles Maivia had used in Shamrock's trunks.
• If Horace said "uncle" when he submits, would he be calling for a Hogan run-in?
• Horace's appearance on Nitro last week was very uneventful. He came out to tell Raven, "You make me sick to my stomach!" If he really made him sick to his stomach would he go be around him? You can't expect much out of Horace though, he is Hogan's nephew. It would have been better if Darren "Puke" Drosdov had come out and claimed Raven made him sick because he could vomit on him. If anyone induces vomiting, its Hogan. And since he's feuding with Warrior, anyone remember Warrior was wrestling Brian Knobs and Papa Shango's "Voo Doo" caused him to vomit (05/92)? It would be great if he could put that vomiting experience to use claiming Hogan made him ill.
• In a related issue, WCW should use a disclaimer prior to Hogan's segments. This would not be that unnatural. It's almost as if WCW uses a disclaimer when High Voltage enters as it warns fans by playing "Danger: High Voltage" on the public address system before they enter. It would be great if they did this for Hogan appearances.
• "Tough guy" (not Duggan) Question: Who has less charisma, Bart Gunn or Dan Severn?
• The Undertaker and Steve Austin situation closely resembled the disgruntled tag team partners angle they ran with Austin and Shawn Michaels in 1997. More recently, ECW used this angle with Chris Candido and Lance Storm. Undertaker's monopoly of the championship belts seemed remarkably similar of a Twix commercial: Two For Me, None For You. Can you say "Copyright Infringement"?
• Speaking of commercials, the advertisements that run during wrestling of late have not seemed to fit. A Cinnaburst commercial mocking wrestling airs during both Raw and Nitro. After devouring a wrestler, one of the sharks (not John Tenta because he "is not a fish!"-reference 06/03/96 Nitro) makes the comment, "I didn't know wrestlers could walk and chew..." This odes not seem to be an effective commercial to air during a wrestling broadcast, yet it airs on both of the country's two premier wrestling programs.
• As an aside, we used our super sleuthing techniques developed from years of watching Scooby Doo to deduce that the eaten wrestler in this endorsement is none other than our beloved paragon of virtue, Chris Jericho. Perhaps this is another diabolical ploy by James J. Dillon. We came to this conclusion from the two clues found in the ad. In the commercial, the eaten wrestler is a champion and wears spandex. We began by confining the prospects to WCW and the WWF as the mainstream is ignorant to other wrestlers. We then ruled out WCW World champion Bill Goldberg, WWF champion Steve Austin,WWF Intercontinental champion Rocky Maivia, WCW tag team champion the Giant and WWF tag team champion Mankind because they wear trunks as opposed to spandex tights. Besides, if Mankind were to be eaten by a shark, he would simply wrestle the next night with some missing limbs. Next, we assumed WWF European champion D-Lo Brown's chest protector would aid him in a Shark (not John Tenta) attack. We also concluded WWF tag team champion Kane's size would make him an unlikely candidate. Then we realized that if WCW tag team champion Scott Hall were eaten by a shark (not John Tenta), not only does he typically wear trunks, but the shark (not John Tenta) would probably be commenting on other substances in his system over Cinnaburst. We ruled out WCW Cruiserweight champion Juventud Guerrera on similar grounds surrounding "Juvi Juice." Finally, we ruled out United States champion Bret Hart because the shark (not John Tenta) would not want to listen to Bret's whining about being "chewed" for the next year. This left the WCW Television champion, Chris Jericho.
• Also, they air a 10-10-321 commercial with John Lithgow and his brother dialing Paris. Who in the Unites States, much less wrestling fans, call Paris anyway? There is no wrestling in France. Andre the Giant (Lord rest his soul- reference 04/28/97 The Jeff Foxworthy Show) did not even wrestle there and he was a native!
• On Thunder there was an example of knowing your target audience, as immediately after Hacksaw Duggan defeated Barry Darsow, WCW noted that Bengay was a sponsor.
• Nevertheless, we miss the days of 1-800-YES-CREDIT! On that note, we will conclude our thoughts on WCW's advertisers.
• On that note, we will also begin venting our frustrations with WCW promos. The promo for Nitro that aired on Thunder was completely outdated. The three clips shown were Nash being beaten in a corner, Sting in black and white and The Giant beating up the nWo. This probably could confuse the casual viewer who had just watched Giant as a member of the nWo. This is nothing new to WCW as the commercial fo the colorful Sting discussing his "office" aired frequently during his black and white phase. The WWF is no better off in having outdated advertisements. The renewal forms in the latest WWF Magazine have pictures of Davey Boy Smith and the Smoking Gunns. Would Billy and Bart Gunn have gotten over by using the fact that both their initials are BG as the BGs? Disco Inferno answers that question.
• While on the subject from promos, on the promo for the nWo Black and White, Eric Bischoff is mentioned before Giant, Scott Steiner, Brian Adams, Buff Bagwell, Scott Norton and the Disciple. On the plus side, they did not show Vincent.
• The highlight of Thunder came while hearing Tony Schiavone attempt to answer Bobby Heenan's question, "What does Vincent do?" Eventually they concluded that Vincent is the "concierge of the nWo." What are the odds that Vincent knows what concierge means?
• We should not be as hard on Vincent after his stellar win over Frankie Lancaster on the 08/08/98 Worldwide. The sad thing is that Vincent is a low-carder even on Worldwide.
• The nWo promos also show the discrepancy between the size of nWo Hollywood and the Wolf Pack, though Hollywood's numbers are padded by the likes of the Disciple and Vincent. This has Kevin Nash disgruntled. This has led to Wade Keller of The Pro Wrestling Torch to speculate that Nash will be given the victory at War Games to appease him. The Wolf Pack does not even have an angle. On Monday they gave an interview essentially regarding nothing other than their presence in the War Games match. They have done nothing to build up to this match. Nash was probably half-shooting with his line, "Sweet to be back in Connecticut." The WWF headquarters is in Stamford.
• Nash is still the king of the advertisements. The "Property of nWo/Just Too Sweet" shirt with Konnan is hysterical. Evidently, he does a local Atlanta commercial for his chiropractor. Perhaps this is his way of thanking him for allowing him to get out of the 06/29/98 Nitro main event in which Goldberg defeated Glacier, instead of "Big Sexy." Nash also appears in a commercial for the TBS program Movie Lounge which will air every Saturday debuting 08/29/98. When Nash's picture is shown it claims, "You never know who might show up."
• In regards to the name Big Sexy, it is reminiscent of the days Michael Hayes referred to himself as "Purely Sexy" or "P.S." That would make Nash "B.S." wouldn't it? Hayes and Nash also both were in factions that used hand signals to show camaraderie. Hayes and the Freebirds used the Freebird handshake. Does anyone remember what word the Freebirds said while performing the shake? If you do, e-mail Chan.
• Also, anyone else notice that most people who where the "Big Sexy" shirts are only half right and we are not referring to the sexy part?
• Despite not having an angle, Nash's Wolf Pack partner Lex Luger has been racking up the championships (pun intended). The Good News: Luger is the only man to hold WCW's three premier championships over the past two years. He held the WCW World tag team championship with the Giant (02/23/97-02/24/97), the WCW World heavyweight championship (08/04/97-08/09/97) and the WCW United States heavyweight championship (08/10/98-08/13/98). The Bad News: His three championship reigns lasted a combined nine days!
• Sting may be getting an angle. Sting recently appeared in his black and white garb from a year ago. Though the announcers never fully got the point across, this was to symbolize his anger. They may have him return to this persona when has been wronged. This angle is patterned after the Keiji Muto-Great Muta characters in Japan. WCW feels that Mick Foley (Cactus Jack, Dude Love, Mankind) has proven that a schizophrenic of sorts can work in this country.
• Speaking of Muta, is there anyone who can explain the levels of pain involved in his mist. At times he sprays green, red, white, yellow, etc. We believe as the angle dictates that yellow is the highest degree as he blinded Sting with it in 1989. Does anyone have any info on the origins or levels of Muta's mist? E-mail Chan
• Another WCW wrestler who may be mimicking Muta is Psicosis. During his match with Juventud Guerrera on Thunder, Psicosis fingers were taped in a similar fashion to Muta. Muta does this to contain capsules to spray his mist. Why does Psicosis do this?
• Speaking of Air Juvi, he was recently was married to 19-year old Laura Perez in Mexico. The Mexican wrestling magazine Super Luchas ran pictures of the event. Several wrestlers were in attendance, many in their masks, including Super Calo, Konnan, Lizmark Jr., Rey Misterio Jr., Psicosis and jobber Norman Smiley who wrestles in Mexico as Black Magic. We have learned that Juventud is quite attractive from more than one source. The most reliable testimonial came from our friend Chad Taylor. He noted, "My mom said he's not a bad looking Mexican and my mom don't like too many Mexicans!" How can you refute evidence like that?
• Air Juvi's ring music does not seem to fit him. He headbangs down the aisle to stereotypical Spanish theme. At a house show we attended in Knoxville (08/22/97), Guerrera came out to AC/DC's Highway to Hell, which the WWF now uses in SummerSlam commercials. Similar ring music would appear to be more appropriate. Our fashion consultant, Joyce Smith, notes that this may not be a headbanging image, but rather he may simply be removing grease from his hair so that his aerial assault will not be top heavy.
• Guerrera's winning the cruiserweight championship with the help from Dean Malenko actually was logical as Guerrera eliminated himself rom the cruiserweight battle royale, allowing Malenko to win his last cruiserweight championship. This may not sound like overwhelming news, but when WCW uses logic in an angle, we are impressed. As an aside, Mike Tenay noted that Malenko once spent a summer as a referee. This was completely true but what Tenay failed to mention is that he worked for the WWF. One common taped match to view Malenko as a referee actually came prior to the summer he worked in the late-80's. On an episode of Saturday Night's Main Event that aired in January 1986, Malenko officiated a bout between Randy Savage and George Steele. He was used as the card was held in Malenko's hometown of Tampa.
• The length of Guerrera's second championship reign has already exceeded his first. The first lasted only seven days (01/08/98-01/15/98). Guerrera defeated Chris Jericho for his latest belt.
• Jerichoholics fear not, as Chris is the new Television champion and even made history with his victory. On 08/10/98, Chris Jericho became the first man to hold both the ECW television championship (06/22/96-07/13/96) and the WCW Television championship.
• The man who never the lost the championship Jericho now holds should be made a booker? That's right, WCW needs to make Booker T a booker. Why? This would be cool because he would then be Booker Booker T. Also, the wrestlers could then call him Mr. T. This rationale makes as much sense as most of the booking in WCW. At least when he returns they should title the promo "How Booker got His Groove Back."
• One man who will not be making a comeback is Rick Martel. The WCW Hotline confirmed on Monday (08/17/98) that Martel has retired after sustaining an injury in a match. He was injured when Ray executed a "Flapjack." Martel's last match occurred against Stevie Ray during the 07/13/98 Nitro. The only question remaining is whether he learned of his retirement before or after it aired on the WCW Hotline.
• The man who ended Martel's career, Stevie Ray, turned 40 on Saturday (08/22/98). This is a common thread in WCW this year as The Barbarian (09/08), The Disciple (08/21), Curt Hennig (03/28), Lex Luger (06/02) and M. Wall Street (03/30) all turn 40 in 1998.
• Speaking of aging wrestlers, Dusty Rhodes may return to is clubberin' if you wiiilll. (Note: To those who don't know what clubberin' means, we'll save you a phone call. Check out the Definition of Clubberin from Slobberknocker Central.) Mark Madden has reported that the gag order angle is building to a Rhodes-Zbyszko match. Earlier in the year, it appeared as though WCW was building towards a bout between Rhodes and Larry Zbyszko, though both denied it. When Zbyszko's scheduled pay-per-view opponent, Louie Spicolli (02/15/98), died tragically prior to SuperBrawl VIII, all mention of Zbyszko's wrestling career reverted to the past tense.
• A coroner in California finally signed Spicolli's death certificate. The cause of death was listed as atherosclerotic hypertrophic cardiomyopathy syndrome, which means that he died of an enlarged heart that is believed to have been caused by taking large does of sleeping pills.
• There was finally an intelligent chant at a WCW event. The "U-S-A, U-S-A" chant WCW fans used during the Barry Darsow-Jim Duggan bout on Thunder may have appeared foolish due to the fact that both competitors are from the United States. While this is true, Darsow had a stint as Russian Krusher Kruschev during the mid-1980s while teaming with Ivan and Nikita Koloff. It also may have been an a way for the crowd to voice their desire to switch to Raw which airs on the USA network.
• Speaking of Darsow, what is written on the back of his trunks? It is encoded in small red letters and does not show well against the background of his black trunks. If anyone knows, e-mail Chan. Our best hypothesis is "Shut your stinkin' mouth!" How often do you get an opportunity to use the word hypothesis in a sentence?
• Regrettably it appears as though Curt Hennig is growing his hair out, eliminating his semi-Afro. This may not seem noteworthy, but has Hennig done anything else recently worth talking about?
• We have some editions to Wade's Hailing from... page. In the latest edition of WCW Magazine (page 49) it lists brief biographies of the WCW officiating crew. They listed: Nick Patrick-Atlanta, Mark Curtis-Pittsburgh, Billy Silverman-Auburn, Maine; Mickey Jay-Quad City, Iowa; Scott Dickenson-Boston and Jimmy Jett-Florida. Rocky King and Charles Robinson's hometowns were not listed.
• Referee Charles Robinson has something in common with Ray Charles. No, we are not implying that Robinson is blind. Ray Charles' full name is Ray Charles Robinson. Think Charles relays this fact when he is asked, "Who's yo' daddy?"
• While on the issue of referees, does anyone know what happened to Randy "Pee Wee" Anderson? If you do, e-mail Chan
• Was Brian Adams' arm pit claw on Thunder the first time that hold was used or is it an Oriental hold?
• WCW has begun the process of repackaging Kidman from one of Raven's grungy lackeys to a clean cut cruiserweight contender. This is why during the segment on Thunder from WCW Saturday Night, Saturn challenged Kidman to win the cruiserweight belt for himself. One fact of this transformation that we object to is the t-shirt switch. Kidman has switched from mangled black shirts to white t-shirts that manufacturers refer to as "A-shirts." These are more commonly known as "wife beaters." This is probably not the best way to get Kidman over as an upstanding citizen.
• By the way, Kidman was the man posing as Jay Leno on the Tonight Show who did flips as a comedy segment.
• Also in the Raven-Saturn-Flock segment from Thunder, Raven claimed to give Kidman a home. This is interesting as his roommate is known as Pelican. Lodi fans will recognize this name from the 02/09/98 Nitro sign "Pelican is on Welfare."
• One final note on the Flock's living situation. As we have stated in the past, Lodi's roommate is Toad. What you may not know is that Toad appeared in the July 1998 edition of WCW Magazine under his real name, Curtis White. There is a picture on page 57. It notes that he is 5' 10", 215 pounds. His birthday is 01/19/71. He hails from the Outerbanks of North Carolina and graduated from Manteo High School in 1989 before attending North Carolina State University. He listed basketball and rugby among his athletic history.
• Two notes on recent Lodi's signs: Could the "Raven Is My Hero" sign be a reference to the Foo Fighters' song? Also we believe his sign on Thunder, "Original Original Original Sign Maker" alludes to the fact that he copied his gimmick from Sign Guy Dudley, who in turn copied his from ECW's original Sign Guy.
• Are there any wrestlers who use their first and middle names as their ring names. Brian Christopher and Kevin Christian do it to not disclose that their father is Jerry Lawler. While in Global, Raven went by his first and middle names, Scott Anthony. Hay anyone else done this? If you know, Chan.
• While on the subject of names, what kind of a name is Ole? Since this is not Ole Anderson's real name, how on Earth did he come up with it? Could it be a derivation of Ollie or a last ditch effort to become a luchador with the name Ole?"
• If the Giant were a boxer, would he still box as "The Giant?" Dave Meltzer of the Wrestling Observer has reported the Giant would like to pursue a career as a boxer without retiring from wrestling. This venture would almost certainly be unsuccessful. There are too many factors. The boxing commission might have to invent a new weight class for the Giant. Every blow would be close to a low blow. His chokeslam would be very difficult to perform sporting boxing gloves. Giant's two-pack-a-day smoking habit is typically not conducive to boxing training. Then again, maybe it could work. After all, it is in his genes. The Giant's "father" Andre defeated boxer Chuck Wepner in a mixed match (06/26/76).
• Speaking of the Giant's jeans, why was he wearing them in his bout against Stevie Ray? Why should that make sense? Nothing else about that feud did. On Thunder, Mark Curtis disqualified the Giant for Scott Hall verbally abusing him after he had liberally interfered in the match. Despite the typical illogical booking, the series did produce several good comments on Thunder. Stevie Ray referred to the Giant as "You overgrown sucka'." The Giant retaliated with verbal slurs at Ray's dental hygiene claiming: "I'm going to close the gap...and I don't mean the gap between your teeth!"
  The best part of the entire sequence was Gene Okerlund introducing the Giant and claiming that Bobby Heenan was one to "ruminate on his virtues." I don't believe we want to know what Gene meant by that.
• Do they call him Glacier because he draws no heat or because the fans react coldly to him?
• Security teams across the country must really love WCW. In addition to their wrestlers constantly winning confrontations despite being at a decided disadvantage, for the past two years they have been filming incidents that reflect poorly on them. On 06/24/96, during a Harlem Heat vs. the Steiners vs. Sting and Luger match, Hall and Nash entered through the crowd carrying aluminum baseball bats while Luger was battling both members of Harlem Heat in the ring. When they arrived at the ring, they began pounding on the steel steps with the bats. The ring soon filled up with "Charlotte's finest" police officers, who were actually carrying guns. A standoff ensued until Hall and Nash back away from the ring. Less than three months later, Sting and Lex Luger stole a police car without it even being mentioned on television the next week (09/02/96). There were absolutely no repercussions. Then, then there was the infamous Steiners of Hazzard video (02/17/97) where the Steiner Brothers opted to take the law in their own hands instead of pressing charges against the nWo who had run them off of the road. At least, the security teams have their secret weapon: mace. Obviously no wrestler could survive a macing after the way Scott Steiner sold the mace at Spring Stampede last year (04/06/97). But wait. After being squashed by Goldberg one week, Meng can take out two tag teams and a security force while being maced the next.
• Do you think Ric Flair is offended that his local Charlotte WNBA franchise is referred to as the Sting? Do you think anyone cares what any WNBA franchise is called?
• As Bill noted in the 08/23/98 Worldwide Report, jobber Mark Guthrie entered to Chris Jericho's old theme music. Fox Sports also runs this music quite often when reviewing baseball highlights. To our knowledge, WCW first used this theme at 1994's Slamboree on 05/24/94 when a returning Tully Blanchard wrestled Terry Funk. Does anyone have further information regarding the use of this song? If you do, let Chan know.
• Jericho's new theme is also being used by another pro athlete. The Atlanta Braves' left fielder Ryan Klesko has Pearl Jam's "Evenflow" played with each at bat. Klesko is a confessed wrestling fan. It is also interesting to note that in the Pearl Jam song "Jeremy," Jeremy is referred to as "King Jeremy the wicked." J.J. Dillon's middle name is Jeremy. Perhaps, this is a way for Jericho to subliminally communicate to his public.
• Another connection between the Turner-owned Braves and Turner-owned WCW came during the fifth inning of Friday night's Braves games with the San Diego Padres. In regards to a muscular fan, Skip Carey commented that he had a "Bill Goldberg-like neck. Is he one of our wrestlers?" Don Sutton replied, "Close enough." Evidently Carey and Sutton are not big fans, though WCW announcer Joe Simpson took his son to the Spring Stampede pay-per-view while the Braves were on a road trip in Colorado (04/19/98).
• This Week In WCW Motor Sports lost all credibility with us when they failed to mention that Bret Hart said, "Gentleman, start your engines" at a Molson Indy Car race in Toronto on 06/17/98.
• We think an addition to the drinking game should include drinking each time WCW is forced to say, "Lance Hooper will try hard again next week to qualify". If he actually qualifies for the race, chug. If he wins the race celebrate because hell has just frozen over.
• Is Nascar an inter-promotional event, with Ted DiBiase and the Pit Crew (Dale Torborg & Chad Fortune) in attendance and Bob Holly racing?
• Ted DiBiase spent too much time around Vincent. Now he too is completely useless in a wrestling setting. If he writes another book it should be titled "Useless by Osmosis."
• Tatsteless report of the week: Evidently, Abdullah the Butcher was not harmed in the U.S. bombing of his "native" Sudan.
• Speaking of tasteless, Raw has promised the Bill Clinton impersonator's return next week on Raw. If the punishment fits the crime and as Republicans speculate President Clinton has a pattern of infidelity, perhaps Yamaguchi-San could castrate him for his own good on Raw. While on the subject, who is a worse Japanese manager Sonny Onoo or Yamaguchi-San?
• Anyone else notice how short-lived morality is in wrestling? WCW has gone to a more harder edge since losing in the ratings. The pious wrestlers also compromise their standards when things do not go there way. Bret Hart has become one of the worst offenders of cursing when he found he could no longer get over as a babyface. Marc Mero and Sable left WCW due to moral issues regarding Kimberly portraying Mero's love interest on television. They said this might have a negative effect on their daughter. Wonder what their daughter is thinking now?
• An example of this came during a commercial break during last week's Nitro. While the cameras were off, Hart said, "I really expected a little more respect in Hartford. 'Stone Cold' Steve Austin never beat me. (Boos) I beat the crap out of Vince McMahon (mega-pop)." Then when a fan berated him, Bret responded with "you cock-sucking faggot, get a life."
• WCW may be the first wrestling company to use the amnesia angle. Last Thursday on Thunder in an interview with Gene Okerlund, Steve McMichael's first comments were "The last thing I remember I was handcuffed to the top of that cage..." This was in reference to last year's War Games and the heinous act committed by Curt Hennig. WCW then proceeded to have a match in which McMichael wrestled Hennig with Horseman wannabe Dean Malenko making the save to avenge this act. Yes, WCW actually set up a match using an angle that happened a year ago! Next thing you know, Konnan will appear claiming to be the Mexican Heavyweight Champion.
• Do you think "British Bulldog" Davey Boy Smith regrets jumping to WCW? Since debuting at the 01/26/98 Nitro from Fort Wayne, Indiana, he has yet to win a championship in WCW. He has one pay-per-view victory in the eight pay-per-views since his debut and it was over Steve McMichael. He has not appeared on the last four pay-per-views. This type of move is particularly damaging at this stage of his career. He will turn 36 on 11/27, which is 252 in dog years.
• Another wrestler whose career is stalling is David "Fit" Finlay. Since losing his television championship to Booker T (06/14/98), his only Nitro appearances have been jobbing to Chris Benoit (06/16/98) and Bret Hart (07/13/98) and he has appeared in no pay-per-views. There is an article on him in the September issue of WCW Magazine titled "My Name Is...Finlay" and discusses the difficulty the WCW production team has had in correctly labeling him on television (pages 24-25). It must have been a slow news month.
• In reviewing old footage, we also obtained a decisive spelling of Eddy Guerrero. We viewed a match taped shortly after Terry Funk's 1989 heel turn (05/07/89). The NWA brought in as many good workers as possible to make Funk look good. One of the wrestlers they brought in was 21-year old Eddy Guerrero. He took numerous bumps for Funk. During this match, Guerrero sported trunks with "Eddy" written across them. Thus, Eddy spells his name with a "y." (Note: We obtained this tape from John McAdam's Wrestling Video Library.)
• Another note from the 1989 wrestling tape: After the 1989 Great American Bash match, after the Ric Flair-Terry Funk match on that tape, one of the men who was beaten was Doug Dellinger, WCW's head of security. In 1989, he still sported brown hair and had yet to grow facial hair. Our question is when did Dellinger begin work with WCW? If you know, e-mail Chan.
• One final observation from our video watching, we watched a 1986 match in which Rick Rude wrestled Wahoo McDaniel in an Indian strap match. Wahoo was introduced as "Truly the best Indian wrestler in the world today." Were there any others? Could he be referred to as "Indian" today? Later the commentator noted "He's the master of the Indian Strap match!" First, we would expect no less of the best Indian wrestler in the world and, second, are there any differences between standard strap matches and Indian strap matches? We were disappointed to find that Wahoo's finisher was not applying Indian rope burns. As an aside the referee for this match was an older gentleman who wore a polo and blue jeans. Any ideas on who this could be? You know the drill.
• Does anyone know what the "E" in James E. Cornette stands for? If you do, e-mail Chan. Charlie thinks it is Earl because that would sound good. It's thinking like this that will make Charlie a valuable addition to the WCW booking committee one day...
• We will conclude our epic guest monologue with a transcript of last week's epic Warrior speech. This 18-minute segment was transcribed for RSPW by EDGEDAR1 and should provide a good intro to this week's Nitro:

  [Hogan makes his way down with Bischoff and the Disciple.]
  [Bischoff holds a 'Bischoff for President' sign.]
  Eric Bischoff: Hey hey hey hey hey. And to my brother down here, I ALREADY AM THE PRESIDENT! I love me!
  Hollywood Hogan: Well, I guess everybody realizes by now, NWO Hollywood don't play no more stinkin' games. You know, as far as JJ Dillon comin' out here, tryin' to put a wrinkle on our plans in War Games, well brother, it would be an honor to get in the ring, take care of the red and black NWO, the WCW all at one time, all of yesterday's garbage like Kevin Nash, and Diamond Dallas Page. But let me tell you somethin', boys. Hollywood's gonna be your champion whether you like it or not. I'm gonna be the man that takes wrestling into the new millennium, with the gold around my waist because it's mine. And Diamond Dallas Page -- you beat-up, ugly-lookin' creep -- well, I guess I'm gonna have to etch the lesson on your forehead, brother, because you don't make no stinkin' rules around here. You don't bring no opponents to the table, brother. Mr. Bischoff is the boss, he's the master, he signs all the documents, and Diamond Dallas Page - you couldn't get it done, you couldn't bring anybody even if you had to, brother. And by the way, who is out there that Hollywood can't handle, brother? [Goldberg chant starts] Who is out there that Hollywood can't put under his thumb, the God of Wrestling or something? Well, sorry you didn't recognize me without my sandals on, Page, but I'm the man, I always will be. There's not a wrestler I can't beat to get my belt back. There's not a war that I can't win to get my belt back. And there's not a warrior in the world that I can't beat to get my belt back. [Lights begin to flicker] Because I've beat....
  Bobby Heenan: Uh-oh.
  Tony Schiavone: We're having a power surge here, or...
  Bobby Heenan: Who knows? I don't like this.
  [Lights go out completely and blue spotlights begin to appear at the entranceway and the ramp.]
  Tony Schiavone: Fans, I...I'm sorry, I don't..
  [Warrior speaks in a muddled voice over that is unintelligible.]
  [Warrior appears at the entranceway and walks down the aisle.]
  Tony Schiavone: What is this?
  Bobby Heenan: I don't know.
  Tony Schiavone: Just a silhouette of man that we see right now...but would you listen to the fans?
  [We see Hogan's face staring at Warrior in disbelief, his lower jaw quivering.]
  Tony Schiavone: And look at the face of a...his..his bottom lip is quivering!
  Bobby Heenan: (realizing who it is) OH MY GOODNESS!
  Mike Tenay: Oh yeah, the fans recognize him and so does Hogan!
  Bobby Heenan: OOOH!
  Tony Schiavone: And so do we! In all my years I never believed I would ever see this!
  Bobby Heenan: I can't believe it!
  [Warrior enters the ring.]
  Tony Schiavone: Unmistakable! It's the Warrior!
  Bobby Heenan There's only one, and that's him!

  Warrior: Talk to me warriors!
  Bobby Heenan: Look at Hogan!
  Warrior: Feel the real power, Hogan!
  Hollywood Hogan: I...I thought you were dead!
  ["Warrior" chant begins.]
  Warrior: Who holds the absolute power now, Hollywood Hogan? [Pop] Unleash that raising voice, warriors! [Pop]
  Tony Schiavone: This is the last thing in the entire universe that Hogan ever expected. And you can see it. I never saw him shake before, but Hogan was shaking.
  Warrior: Seems as if no formal introduction is gonna be necessary! [Pop] Actually, it even seems that there are those who anticipated my arrival! [Pop]
  Bobby Heenan: Well, they're glad he's here!
  Tony Schiavone: Hogan is..Hogan's..I think Hogan is s...I think he's scared to death. I think he wants to make amends.
  [Hogan removes his NWO shirt and offers it to the Warrior.]
  Tony Schiavone: He..he's doing everything...look at this. He took off...he wants him to join him! He wants him to join him!
  Bobby Heenan: There's the act of a coward, right there.
  Warrior: What is that smell? [Hogan drops the shirt.] You might wanna use that [the shirt] to clean up the mess you just made all over yourself. [Pop] You need to open your eyes and ears, take control of the limited ability you have to understand the words I am about to say. For years, I have watched while this industry, with you as it's figurehead, try to recreate what is simply unrecreatable. [Pop] I have heard, listened to all the innuendoes and speculation that something ULTIMATE or WARRIOR may soon re-appear. [Pop] Welcome to the reappearance! Those things, Hogan, which are irreplaceable, whether they be people, places, or things, are never forgotten. You are witnessing that RIGHT NOW!
  Bobby Heenan: Hogan is visibly shaken.
  Tony Schiavone: Hah! I he-d-he-I---speechless. Has no idea where to go, what to say, what to do next. And the fans here are into it!
  Bobby Heenan: He's at a loss for words.
  Tony Schiavone: Bischoff looks sick. [Eric is doubled over at the stomach.]
  Warrior: History tells us, Hogan... [LOUD "Hogan Sucks" chant begins. Warrior signals it to end.] Let's talk about something he doesn't know. [Pop]
  Bobby Heenan: Bingo!
  Warrior: History tells us, Hogan, that a man's legacy is built from the premise that within his life, the moments lived, once lived, become a piece of his history. Somehow, you have conveniently, even eloquently misplaced pieces of your history. In the one time, epical battle between us, Hogan, you were the quintessential influence of what was good, great, and heroic. But different than you may remember, and albeit you may have beaten myths, legends, giants, and other great men, you NEVER, NEVER beat a warrior. [Pop]
  Bobby Heenan: Right up in his face!
  Tony Schiavone: Right in his soul is what he is.
  Warrior: AND, CERTAINLY, NOT THE ULTIMATE ONE! [Pop] As the victor of that one time battle, I defeated what was, until then, undefeatable. I conquered what was then unconquerable. I dominated what was, until then, indomitable. On that day, you were great. I WAS ULTIMATE! [Pop] Let me introduce myself...to those two fools that stand behind you. Let's see, this...dude [Disciple]...must be your barber. [Slow pop] [Tony, Heenan and Tenay chuckle on that one.] And who are you, little man? [Eric] Who are you?
  Tony Schiavone: Introduce yourself, here.
  Eric Bischoff: You know who I am. My name is Eric Bischoff and I run this company and who invited you?
  Warrior: [laughs] Different than you wanna make people believe, I never received an invitation. I showed up on my own accord. And let me tell you, Mr. Eric Bischoff, if you stick your nose in my business, you will only very quickly prepare for your own demise. [Pop] Furthermore, when I get done with my business here, I'm gonna be sending you a bill. I suggest you pay it. I have...waited...patiently. The WARRIORS have waited all too patiently. Now...NOW...the virtue of justice unties my hands so that I can continue to fulfill a destiny set in motion on that memorable day years ago. A destiny at the next level. A destiny beckoning the next superhero. [Pop] There really is no sadder sight than when a grown man fears the challenges in his life so much that he rationalizes adolescent behavior to the point where he carries out heinous and self-indulgent actions. Your evilness, an evilness you embodied and portray, is intolerable. I am the one that has the power to destroy you. [Pop] In sorts, Hogan, the truth is inexhaustible. I come here, not to beat you up tonight, Hogan. [boos] Beating you means nothing anymore, everybody already has. [Pop]
  Bobby Heenan: Now to Hogan, that hurts.
  Warrior: No no no no no no no no no, that's too easy. Because you felt guilty for being who you were. Your mind became weak, and Hulkamania became boring. I come here, Hogan, to tell you -- NEXT WEEK -- I intend to launch a revolution not even you can control. [Pop] I ask you to find the courage -- check it out. Next week. Same Warrior time. Same Warrior place. Same Warrior channel. *snort* [Pop]
  [The lights dim and the ring quickly fills with smoke. The lights flash 4 or 5 times and then turn back on. The smoke quickly dissipates to reveal the Warrior is gone. Very cool effect as it only takes about 6-8 seconds.]
  Tony Schiavone: He has vanished! Ladies and gentlemen, in one of the most mind-boggling and incredible displays that we've ever witnessed on this program, the Warrior has literally vaporized before our very eyes.
  Bobby Heenan: Never seen anything like this in my life.
  Tony Schiavone: There's never been anything like this in our sport!
  [A Batman-like "call signal" is projected to the roof -- a blue circle with a black Warrior logo embedded.]
  Tony Schiavone: Look at the sign...don't you DARE touch that dial. Heenan: Uh-uh.
  [Fade to commercial]

• Now, let the Revolution begin...
• We are live from the United Center in Chicago, Illinois. The last time WCW was in the United Center was for the 03/30/98 Nitro.
• A black limousine containing Hogan, Disciple, Bischoff, and Miss "Ooh Yeah" Elizabeth pulls up. "VooDoo Child" is played as Liz and crew make their way through the backstage area and emerge to the crowd. (I refuse to say "Hogan [or Bischoff for that matter] and crew")
  • What I would give to eat my Chex Mix off Liz's snack trays.....
  • Or her's (reference to gorgeous fan at ringside)
• Good Gawd, this is when I wish RAW went 3 hours also
  • Bischoff, while holding a pen, claims that "this is the most powerful thing in the world other than Hogan."
    • He mentions Vader and Johnny B. Badd in this segment.
    • This is directed towards Eddy Guerrero
  • Hogan wants to beat someone up tonight. He mentions DDP ("a powerless and strokeless puke"). Then mentions that Warrior hid for 8 years after his match with Hogan. Contrary to popular belief, Hogan can't wait for the War Games match. The rumored team for nWo black and white was Hart, Hennig, and Hall.
    • If Hogan shows up as a manager of the team, or either of the forementioned, we would have a new nWo faction....nWo black and white 4H Club.
  • This was pointless
• Now we have the opening......
• Tony says something about Sammy Sosa and Wrigley Field
• Footage of Warrior's return last week
• Mike Enos vs Wrath
  • Something tells me that no credibility whatsoever will be given to the worker tonight.
  • This is Wrath's first TV appearance in months. He did appear at house shows over the weekend.
  • Sign: "This match sucks"
    • My thoughts expressed with such literature......
  • Now we have a brawl outside. It's good to see Wrath again. He looks to be in great shape
  • Wrath wins with an incredible move. Looks like a pumphandle (I prefer to call it "Ball & Chain") into a powerslam.
  • Nope, no credibility whatsoever
  • Joyce Note: "Lots of masturbation alluding: 'Bischoff the stroker' and 'Kevin Nash shooting his wad'"
• Lee Marshall has been demoted to "Starburst On the Road" reports
  • Thank God
• Segment entitled "Feel the Power of the Warrior"
• Larry is acknowledging his hometown, he'll be back
• The TT's discuss the Goldberg and Nash confrontation.
  • Yes, TT is short for Tony & Tenay
• Footage from last week's 3 minute DQ main event. Opposed to RAW's 10-second "confrontation"
• Mmmmm, Nitro Girls. Chae looks like the Asian chick who hit on me at last night's Creed concert.
• Nitro Party pack winners. We have Tony, Tenay and Larry impersonations. If they only said that something had literally.....
• Kaz Hayashi vs "Harry's Burgers" retiree of the year, Dean Malenko
  • Aaaah, finally some discussion of Malenko and the Horseman rather than alluding to how Malenko will never reach the superstar status of Warrior.
  • Charles Robinson will be calling this bout
  • Uh huh huh, Tony said "Wide vertical base"
  • A small "We want Flair!" chant erupts
  • Sign: "Stinko Malenko"
  • Gee, commercial break in the middle of the match. I'll place a $77,777.77 bet that they wouldn't do that to Hogan.
    • Notice that I not only used our 7 reference (see Conspiracy Theory), but I used the number 7 seven times.....
  • We return to the match after approximately 77 seconds.
  • Tony and Larry are talking about how War Games is one of the most dangerous matches ever. I see, disregard every ECW match must be WCW's new policy. Larry mentions being in War Games. This is true. He did so in '92 as a member of the Dangerous Alliance and was directly responsible for his team's loss. He went to hit Sting with a turnbuckle that was loose and hit one of his own partners, Bobby Eaton, instead, separating his shoulder. Bobby Eaton shortly thereafter submitted to an armlock.
  • Hayashi hit a European uppercut. Yes, a Japanese man hit a European uppercut. You don't see that everyday.
  • During this match Malenko attempted a series of three rolling short clotheslines. Hayashi caught him on the last one. Why is everyone doing a series of three moves? Benoit has the three rolling German suplexes and Raven now has the three rolling Russian legsweeps.
  • Hayashi is executing some tremendous dives late in the match including a senton, a missed moonsault and a Mahistral cradle.
  • Malenko slams Hayashi and turns him into the Texas Cloverleaf for the win
  • Schiavone missed another move as Malenko set up the Cloverleaf with a Tiger Bomb, not a power bomb as Schiavone noted. At least it was not a "Sidewalk slam."
• "Special Look" at the Wolfpack
  • I like Nash, but there's just something about a honky (and an aged one at that) saying "Hizouse"
  • Nothing much other than showing a clip of all members of the Pac
• A Stingless Wolfpac approaches the ring.
  • You gotta love Konnan's sarape.
  • For the record, Stephen and Joyce took a cruise which stopped in Mexico where they purchased a sarape for Matt.
  • Luger speaks first. The Wolf Pack's segments always go from worst interview to best as Luger to Konnan to Nash is an excellent combination. In another note on the Wolf Pack hierarchy, Luger stands to Nash's right, while Konnan is on his left as Luger is a bigger star in the States.
  • Ironically, the announcers fail to mention Luger has hailed from Chicago throughout his career. He is actually from Buffalo, New York.
  • Konnan wants to speak on this. Ah Yeah, K-Dawg just sent a sign to the Triple Threat
  • Could Konnan's "Rowdy Rowdy" be a preview of Piper's comeback?
  • Sign: "What about Tommy?"....Very nice
  • Nash claims that Hogan "can't run with us dawg." Says that Hogan's got a war.
    • Reference to his WCW debut...."You wanna war?, You got one"
  • Nash wants to be champion.
  • Nash used to only have the tiger tattoo on his right bicep. What is the new one on his tricep and when did he get it? E-mail Chan.
  • Nash did address some of his grievances. Regarding the small size of the Wolf Pack he used the phrase "Though there's few, we are the proud." As far as having no angle, "my dance card right now is empty." For the record, Nash used the Marine motto when he served in the Army?
  • Time to address Goldberg.....
    • He had a beer to settle his situation with Goldberg after the first spear.
    • Last week, he only had a beer with 2 people. (Note: Sting did not drink with the Pack last week.) Of course, Goldberg and Nash left as friends after the second spear, too, but since it didn't happen on TV, it didn't really count.
    • "The only thing you make things right, tonight you tag up with me, and me and you"....(Goldberg's music plays)
    • Sounds like Tony is having an orgasm as he sees Goldberg pace through the back and into the arena.
    • Anyone wonder why Godberg has security follow him throughout the secluded backstage area, yet when he goes into the ring in front of thousands they do not follow him. Our theory: Goldberg fears Jerry Flynn!
    • Goldberg jumps in the ring, agrees, and leaves. The fans boo Goldberg as he leaves ringside.
    • Nash: "All I got to say, Hogan, Giant, you're next"
• Segment entitled, "No NWO for Warrior"
• Jim "Yeah Baby" Neidhart vs Konnan
  • Neidhart doesn't even make it to the ring before the 'Pac music starts
  • Neidhart is decked out in almost all pink. This is part of a continuing process to remind people that he was once in the Hart Foundation.
  • Why did Konnan return to the dressing room after the last interview since he was in the match immediately following it?
  • Billy Silverman is the ref
  • Neidhart starts the match by yelling "Shut up" at a fan. I guess he is a heel in this match. Jobbers really aren't heels or faces are they?
  • 5 person sign, "O-R-A-L-E"
  • Tenay confirms that "Arriba la Raza" means "Power to the People (Race)"
  • Oh no, Piper is in the building
  • Is it me or is the Nitro logo in the middle of the ring very annoying?
  • Konnan wins via Tequila Sunrise
• Tony's tubby @$$ is out to interview Stevie Ray
  • Pimpin' in his checked pants and silver shirt. Decking sunglasses, and yes, a thick gold chain. The God Father ain't got nothing on Stevie Ray
  • Booker T comes out and says "What up" as Stevie claims to be chasing back "his title"
  • Booker T's black tie with yellow stripes completely clashes with his blue denim shirt and black slacks. We give the fashion edge to Stevie Ray.
  • Booker T attempted to use the word "desecratin'"
  • Oh this is sorry. Booker is claiming that he "left the country" to heal. For the record, "Everybody axe him what's up with Stevie Ray" Ironic that while Booker was healing, Stevie was turning heel.
  • Stevie: "JJ is out here pimpin' you for all these people"
  • Ray makes the claim: "We ain't got a shot at the tag team belts since we started." This is totally false. In the team's first match after Ray's return on the 06/22 Nitro, they earned a championship match.
  • Booker has been booked as the number-one contender for the US Title
  • Booker and Bret are gonna "raise the roof in this mug" one more time tonight.
  • Man, that really sounded like an argument between Fred and Lamont on "Sanford & Son"
• Kimberly in a very slow dance solo
• Schiavone calls out the leader of WCW, Diamond Dallas Page.
  • DDP's entrance time rivaled Glacier.
  • DDP brought out a pen to mock Bischoff. He reveals his desire to put the pen through Bischoff's right ear through his left.
  • He then addresses Hollywood "Scum" Hogan.
  • If there's somebody out there who would like to step up to the plate, then I welcome them...Like I said, I welcome them!" I think Piper missed his cue so DDP had to repeat it twice.
  • I think Tenay would be better if he would just speak when spoken to.
  • Kevin Nash listed Roddy Piper as his "Favorite Fruit" in the latest edition of WCW Magazine.
  • Anyone else hoping for a retirement announcement? It would be Piper's fourth. He can still catch Sugar Ray Leonard.
  • Piper claims to come out as the commissioner. He then congratulates DDP.
  • Piper claims to have been doing a movie with Burt Reynolds. My, how the mighty have fallen.
  • Piper claims to be the only guy Bischoff can't fire. For once I would agree with a Bischoff ego trip to fire him just because he can.
  • He mocks Bischoff by calling him an Eddie Munster look-a-like and claims a topless Bischoff resembles Mick Jagger. Piper's act is as old as those references.
  • Piper invokes the name of Chicago Cubs' slugger Sammy Sosa to draw heat. He does this cheap heat tactic every interview. You would not believe how much I hate Piper.
  • Piper then announces he will join DDP at War Games. Well, I'm surprised. (Read sarcasm).
  • He claims he will form a "Dream Team." In my opinion with DDP and Piper, it will not be much of a "Dream Team."
• Steve McMichael vs. Riggs
  • Wildcat Willie can be seen as McMichael walks to the ring.
  • McMichael returns home to Chicago where he played with the Bears for thirteen seasons.
  • Scotty Riggs received no entrance music.
  • Mark Curtis is the referee.
  • The announcers discuss the Horsemen situation and Riggs mocked the Horsemen hand signal during the match. Riggs drew pretty solid heat in the match with similar antics.
  • Riggs received more offense than normal in this match as well, even scoring a two-count.
  • McMichael hit two horrendous shoulderblock tackles. Riggs sold them anyway.
  • The finish came when Riggs came off the ropes and McMichael set him for the Mongo Spike (tombstone piledriver).
  • Horace hit McMichael with a "thirty-pound" stop sign while accompanied by Sick Boy.
  • Dean Malenko made the save complete with hooking the Cloverleaf on Sick Boy.
  • Schiavone: "Sick Boy's got Malenko." He must have obtained this virus at Harry's Burgers.
  • Saturn interferes to continue one of the most confusing angles in history. Saturn goes on to fly out of the ring into Horace, hitting the stop sign. It looks like Saturn whacked his arm bad on the sign.
  • McMichael is the Horsemen's savior. That in and of itself is enough for this angle to flop.
• The Nitro Girls in black leather. Enough said.
• Bobby Heenan joins the announcing team.
• Rick Fuller vs. Scott Norton with Vincent
  Tenay mentions that Notron has a 650-pound bench press. Heenan: "You mean they have benches that weight 650?"
  • The crowd "whoos" as the big men exchange chops.
  • Fuller is wearing black and red. Maybe this is the Wolf Pack's answer to the Disciple.
  • Charles Robinson is the referee.
  • Norton scored the pin shortly.
  • The announcers began comparing him to Goldberg claiming his winning streak was starting. He was given this gimmick in Japan and that is why his hair is gone. If nothing else, Rick Fuller is the type of competitor Goldberg would defeat.
• Black and white promo.
• Scott Steiner comes out with "Doc."
  • Tony speculates that Warrior will appear tonight. It's insight like this that earned him his announcing position.
  • Schiavone mentions WCW will be in Fairfax, Virginia on 09/26/98. Our guess: Bill will be in the hizouse.
  • Schiavone announces that Scott has signed to wrestle Rick on this program.
  • Scott: "Before you boo me, remember before Michael Jordan got to Chicago, Chicago sucked and since last season was his last season Chicago's gonna suck again."
  • "Doc" claims that there is no way he can give him permission to wrestle "because."
  • Steiner says that although Doc is his best doctor ever, he will disobey him and wreslte. He then cues Rick's music.
  • Think Doc is the gas man's supplier?
  • Buff Bagwell entered mimicking Rick. Schiavone said, "Can you believe it?" Let's see, they've done this angle before, Scott Steiner and Buff Bagwell have been inseparable on camera of late and Buff was not present for this segment, and WCW has done this repeatedly all year with Rey Mysterio Jr. and Bore-US Malenko impersonators. Nope, can't believe it.
  • Scott Dickenson is the "referee."
  • Scott then talk "Rick" into forgoing the match for a doggy treat.
  • He then told Rick to "roll over and play dead." He then pinned "Rick."
  • The segment closed with Buff getting up saying, "I'm Buff and I'm the stuff and all you people are stupid!" This was completely random and is probably the most accurate statement of the night.
• Wolf Pack promo with Nash voice over. Savage is included.
• Replay of Goldberg's acceptance words.
• Brian Adams with Vincent vs. Lex Luger.
  • The second hour has not been exactly full of the great workers
  • Billy Silverman is YOUR referee
  • As Vincent interfered on the outside, Schiavone made the comment, "Vincent one heavy hitter." Wonder why Schiavone has no credibility.
  • Adams scored a two-count after the Vincent interference.
  • Something tells me Raw would win the ratings war regardless of who they out up against this one.
  • Schiavone mentions that Adams is working the back to neutralize the Torture Rack. Tony made a point. By the way, Adams scored a two-count
  • While Luger was working the shoulder, a drunken fan stood up and gave the crotch chop with a beer still in his hand. Sadly, this was the highlight of the match!
  • Adams did have an impressive back breaker from the press slam position.
  • Luger regained the advantage and a two-count with a forearm.
  • He followed with the power slam. Vincent interfered, but was unsuccessful from the top rope. Though this was in front of Silverman, he did nothing.
  • Luger won shortly after with the Rack.
  • The finish was a bit altered as Luger attempted a cover out of the forearm and Vincent's interference did not lead to the disqualification, but the finish was still very predictable.
  • Besides, Vincent has never gone two consecutive matches without being manhandled.
• The Warrior entered.
  He wore orange and black with "oWn" written across the back of his trench coat.
  • Despite not running to the ring, I swear Warrior is winded after his second phrase "Talk to me Warriors!"
  • A fan holds up an oWn t-shirt.
  • Warrior claims he patterned his career after Hogan. He then claimed that Hogan was not as he remembered.
  • He claims that if there is good left in Hogan, it is difficult to see. This is somewhat reminiscent of Darth Vader/Anican Skywalker.
  • He claims Hogan "sold out to mediocrity and when that became difficult to mindless self-pity. He traded being one in a million to one of the millions." Any clues as to what this means? Unintelligible nonsense. The Warrior is definitely back.
  • He claims "Patience is a great virtue." He then completely switched gears and when nowhere with that phrase. He has a little Chan and Charlie randomness in him.
  • After a tirade of nothingness, he announces the formation of the "One Warrior Nation!", and presumably a line of t-shirts. This was the only understandable comment for quite awhile.
  • I think there will be a revolution but that is about all I could make out of this. The fans aren't responding as they are sitting on their hands.
  • Warrior: "Next week Hogan, the Revolution continues!" I guess that means it started. Must have missed it.
  • He got virtually no heat at the end of this horrid segment.
  • At least when WCW programmed its entire broadcast around Goldberg, he did something of note. No such luck with Warrior.
• I still think oWn should be short for One Warrior Nugget
• Tony is still waiting for the unveiling of the One Warrior Nation
  • What about the nuggets?
• nWo music for the 200,000th time tonight
• Curt Hennig w/o Ric Rude vs WCW World Television Champion Chris Jericho
  • Chris is blowing kisses to all Jerichoholics.
  • Jericho slipped and fell on his rump while kicking around a fan's sign
  • Jericho is wearing a shirt which appears to be from the MooGooGai Island of Mahimahi
  • Heenan: "Jericho's hair looks like a blooming onion"
  • Mark Curtis is the ref
    • Two of WCW's funniest employees in the ring at the same time
  • Jericho desperately holds on to Hennig as he is being thrown around the ring
  • There's something you don't see that often nowadays.......a couple of headbutts by Hennig
  • Hennig chops down Jericho and the "Paragon of Virtue" chops his way back
  • Hennig hits his rolling headsnap thingy
  • Hennig takes Jericho down with a dragon legscrew
  • Tenay mentions that Hennig is trying to teach Jericho a wrestling lesson. Another attempt by WCW to put down one of their most talented stars because he hasn't signed a contract extension.
  • Hennig reaches the ropes as Jericho locks him in the Liontamer
  • Hennig goes for the Hennigplex and Jericho reverses it into an inside cradle for a 2 count
  • The 10 minute TV time limit expires and the 2 battle it out anyway after throwing Curtis out of the ring.
  • Giant paces the ring and shoves Hennig off Jericho. In the midst of a staredown between Giant and Hennig, Jericho rolls out of the ring and takes off with his beloved belt
  • Hennig and Giant jaw it out before Hennig rolls out of the ring.
  • Giant follows Hennig to the back as they continue their argument.
• Fyre, AC, and Chae doing their own Triple Threat
  • Hey baby, want some fries with that shake?
• Nitro Party Video plug presented by Mug root beer
• Fade to back as Booker and Stevie Ray jive it out
  • Booker T: "Just do what I axe you to, OK?"
  • Notice that Booker T and Stevie Ray are featured after a promo presented by Mug Root Beer. Coincidence, I think not.
• WCW US Heavyweight Champion Bret Hart vs Booker T
  • Why is a foreigner holding the US Title?
  • Booker's music stops so Bret can cuss a little bit
    • Bret says that the fans corrupted the world of heroes.
    • Claims that the only person he can trust and respect is Hogan
      • Liar, liar, pants of fire.......
    • "Sting we act alike, we almost look alike......"
    • Bret says that the fans are what's wrong with wrestling today. Says he will not act as a "Hitman."
  • Still no Booker so we go to break.
  • Cameras in the back showing Stevie Ray standing over and yelling at a fallen Booker T holding his knee.
  • The announcers are speculating that Stevie "did this to his brother." Ya think?
  • Stevie Ray approaches Bret Hart
    • Bret denies knowing anything about what happened to Booker T. Bret says he has no problem with Stevie Ray. While this is going on Giant, Hennig, Pumpalicious, Norton, Vincent, and Adams approach the ring with an nWo shirt.
    • Stevie Ray takes his shirt off. Bret says that they respect Stevie. They throw out an invitation to Stevie Ray. "Be a buddy." If Bret only said "Be a homey". Stevie Ray accepts the shirt and kisses fingers with the others.
    • Chad is curious: "Does this make Stevie, Big Poppa Pimp?"
• Sign: "Hitman tosses Hogan's salad"
• Sign: "Bobby fears Pepe"
• Hogan and Giant w/Disciple vs Kevin Nash and Goldberg
  • 20 minutes early, huh. I feel some mic work coming shortly
  • Mickey J is the ref. Heh, no Michael Buffer tonight.
  • We've got a fan with the new Hollywood Hogan wrestling buddy. I refuse to spend two cents on something with Hogan's name on it.
  • Surprisingly there were only eight minutes of introductions.
  • I smell a DQ coming along. Not just because this is WCW, but how often do you see either of these four men do a job?
  • Nash and Giant start off tonight's main event
  • Nash cracks up as a "Hogan sux" chant erupts
  • Nash bumps chests with Giant and gets a headbutt. Nash then eats the big boot, but Giant misses the elbow drop
  • Nash knees Giant into the corner and then measures him up for an elbow. Sends Giant into the opposite corner and follows him with a clothesline.
  • Nash and Giant with a weak double clothesline, and both eat a big boot. Man, this is awful.
  • Goldberg answers the chant by tagging in. Giant tags in Hogan. Hogan wants to redeem himself, but it's not gonna work.
  • Goldberg tosses Hogan to the mat twice. Hogan knees Goldberg and takes a pathetic advantage. You know, rake his eyes, pull at his mouth, slam his head in the turnbuckle, same'ol same'ol.
  • Goldberg makes a comeback and takes Hogan down with a shoulderblock 3 times. Disciple hit Goldberg with the title belt and Hogan drives a knee in the corner. Hennig and Giant beat on Nash after he goes for Disciple.
  • Hogan gives Goldberg a belly-to-back suplex, but Goldberg gets up. nWo Hollywood is clocking Goldberg and Luger runs in. K-Dawg runs in to even up the score. As Hennig is clocking Goldberg, Bill no-sells and makes a comback. Everyone fights outside the ring and Goldberg takes Hennig out with the spear, then the jackhammer.
  • OK, the ref just gave Goldberg and Nash the win even though Hennig wasn't even in the match.
  • Hogan clocks Goldberg. Nash goes to kick Hogan, but nails Goldberg instead. Giant clotheslines Goldberg over the top rope.
  • Piper, DDP and Warrior come out together. Although Piper is 30 yards behind. The ring is cleared and the three forementioned wrestlers are the only ones remaining in the ring. This is WCW's dream team? Oh dear God
  • Goldberg and Nash jaw it off yelling "Come on!" as they fade to black.
• Chad noted that there is something familiar about a muscle-bound face painted man in a trench coat annihilating the entire nWo. We couldn't have said it better ourselves.
• Trivia Answer #1: Raven entered to Offspring's "Come Out And Play (Keep 'Em Separated)" during his stint in ECW. Both titles to Raven's themes are comprised of four words and the first word in each is "Come." Coincidence? We think not. If you can tell us the band that performs Raven's current theme, please e-mail Chan.
• Trivia Answer #2: Chase Tatum, like the Warrior, is a former Mr. Georgia.
• Since we watched Nitro so you didn't have to, use the time you saved to check out Pro Wrestling's Unsolved Mysteries!
• It will probably be awhile until our next cameo as Chan returns to the University of Tennessee on Wednesday and Charlie goes back to Pellissippi State Technical Community College the next day so until next time, may the (Cecil) Schwartz be with you! (Reference- Space Balls (1987).)

Here's a brief report of my attendance at Nitro....there wasn't much you didn't see on TV, so I'll make it brief.

Before Nitro, not much really happened. David Penzer came out at about 6:45 to give Warrior t-shirts to the crowd. Not surprisingly, only people in the first row of seats got them. He then told those people to wear the shirts and they would be on TV.

The first hour was one of the most worthless series of matches I've ever seen on a live TV program. I did note that a big white light goes on over the announcers' position to signal a commercial when a match is still going on. Both the ref and Malenko kept looking towards the podium until the light went back off. Also, as what happened last time Nitro was in Chicago, just about everyone gets booed except the Wolfpac. Goldberg, the Warrior, Hogan, you name it - everyone got booed.

Also similar to last time, it's terribly hard to hear the interviews in the arena. The music for the entrances is loud and clear, but you really have to look at the monitors and read lips to make sense of the interviews. Especially with Tony - everytime Tony attemepted to conduct a interview the guy next to me yelled "Speak up, fatass!"

As you saw on TV, the Warrior was booed, Goldberg was booed, and the main event, although cheered when it was announced was also booed. Especially when Goldberg pinned a guy not even involved in the match! After the show ended the WCW dream team continued to draw heat from the crowd.

Finally, the commercial breaks were mostly uneventful. There was, of course, the obligatory, flashing contest between two girls. Also, Bret Hart called the fans a bunch of shits during the break in his "match." And Hogan/Giant basically sat in the corner talking to each other during the break, as the Giant attempted to shield Hogan from all of the debris flying into the ring. Speaking of debris, there was definitely less crap tossed in the ring then the last Nitro, when everyone in the entire arena tossed their beer at Hogan at the end of the show. And, only five people that I could count were ejected, as opposed to at least 25 during the last show.

Well, that's all from here - I'm going to the Saturday Night taping tonight, I'll have a report from there up tomorrow!